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Hi my wife is still fairly young 47.
I havnt been able to give her penetrative sex for 3 yrs now.
Saving up for a implant.
We use toys oral etc but I know she misses intercourse.
Has anyone brought in someone just for sex for her?
It would only be say twice a yr maybe on vacation and I would be there .
Or is this a recipes for disaster . My wife has not asked for this , but when we go on nudist beaches , she gets really horny seeing all the young endowed men.

I wish I could help...

Ask your wife. I thought of that when my ED was at it's worse, just before my implant. Oral, fingers and toys just didn't satisfy her, and I knew it. One night she refused any action with the words I just can't do it that way any more. That's when I asked her if I needed a sub. Think that shocked her that I would allow that, but she totally refused. That's when I knew it was time for the implant. Yes it cost me quite a bit but it has helped our relationship a million times more.

Once Covid is over you might want to consider a spot like Hedonism Resort, in Jamaica. It's a noted swinger's resort and you'll have no problem finding the husband of another couple who's willing to satisfy your wife. Meanwhile, maybe you'll at least be able to enjoy some oral from the other couple's wife. The question is whether you could handle all of that from an emotional standpoint. Whatever you do always be in the same room with your wife all the time when there is sex going on.

Good luck.

No I wouldn’t be interested in having any type of sex with another.
This would be just for my wife until I had the implant.
Don’t want a regular thing either , just maybe on a vacation , that sounds ok.
Anyone done this? Or am I mad for thinking it.
Don’t want to ruin my marriage but know my wife is missing intercourse.

Pau1pau1 wrote:No I wouldn’t be interested in having any type of sex with another.
This would be just for my wife until I had the implant.
Don’t want a regular thing either , just maybe on a vacation , that sounds ok.
Anyone done this? Or am I mad for thinking it.
Don’t want to ruin my marriage but know my wife is missing intercourse.

In general, most women (which leaves a LOT of exceptions to the general rule) women make love to the MAN, not to the PENIS. The penis just happens to be part of the package.

Sure, she misses penetration by your penis. But any other man's penis would not be attached to YOU, so it would not be the same, or as satisfying.

Oldguy's wife is a case in point, though her refusing the alternative ways of having sex seems contradictory.

So we talked about this last night, At the rate we are saving it’s gunna be 12 months or more before we can afford it. She says she enjoys using toys with me but it’s just not the same.
I have noticed she’s a lot more snappy with me , I’m putting this down to sexual frustrations .
I hope we make it to the implant and it works ok.

Pau1pau1 wrote:So we talked about this last night, At the rate we are saving it’s gunna be 12 months or more before we can afford it. She says she enjoys using toys with me but it’s just not the same.
I have noticed she’s a lot more snappy with me , I’m putting this down to sexual frustrations .
I hope we make it to the implant and it works ok.

Insurance doesn’t cover it in your case?

Lost Sheep wrote:
Oldguy's wife is a case in point, though her refusing the alternative ways of having sex seems contradictory.

The wife has become quite reserved regarding sex since her hysterectomy. She takes replacement hormones daily but that doesn't seem to change anything.
Our relationship has evolved over the years. At the beginning she was mostly the instigator of sex. We worked together and after work was always a bath together. We had a huge clawfoot tub. As soon as we washed up she would be stroking my dick, sometimes before finishing bathing. That always led to dry off and hop in bed. Many nights we would have sex again before going to sleep. Then we went through a couple of years of drugs and wild sex, including all sorts of toys. We never included any other people, just the two of us. When we got off the drugs and cleaned up it kind of became my job to start sex. Then she had the hysterectomy, and no sex for 6 weeks. After that I was always the one to ask (beg?) for sex. When ED hit it got to the point she didn't want anything to do with sex. Nothing.
After a long discussion about getting implanted she kind of took a don't care approach to it. But the day of surgery she was there, very concerned. She took care of me for weeks, doing all the stuff I normally do.
Once I healed she was ready to test the waters. Yes she still wanted sex, but with ME, not a toy, not a finger, but with my dick. But to this day I am still the one who has to start anything.

Hmmm....In another marriage we had experimented with the swinging lifestyle, didn't work as jealousy became a factor on her part. In some relationships, bringing in another or swing works. Many pros and cons to consider! Personally for me and my current wife, we would not consider.

Suggestion....there are a few member on this site have invested in a sybian type machine, or putting it bluntly....look into a "fucking machine". One member here said his wife wore out 2-3 motors on a machine.

With my ED, long story, and not having any kind of sex with my precious wife for almost 2.5 years, she had thought about having sex with another. I know she couldn't actually get involved in that, but was sort of a suggestion to me, that I needed to do something about my ED.

Best of luck to you in your journey!