Psychological ed

[Rawness1111]

Hello friends, about 1 year ago I experienced what I believe to be psychological ed. I was depressed, just gotten a divorce and my wife had moved on. About three months ago I took my first viagra and had very successful intercourse. Three or 4 times after that I didn't take any pill at all and still had very successful intercourse but the last two times in a row was short lived. I'm 32 years old and with no problem that I am aware of. Tell me, is this normal or am I still suffering fromed?

[Flavio]

Welcome to the forum!

Yes, depression is a major cause of ED and most antidepressants, esp SSRIs, will only worsen the condition.

No, I don't think you are suffering from ED, which is a persistent or recurrent inability to achieve and maintain an erection. It's perfectly normal to fail every now and then, that's not ED.

If you have any doubts or questions, go see a doctor (urologist). It's always a good idea to seek professional help, even if this is just psychological.

Doing a lot of research on this subject is also a good idea. The more you know about ED, the less stressful it will be.

I suffered from coital anxiety for many years, check out my threads on FT.

[verytempted1992]

Wrong forum to ask this question imo.

I've found most people on here (but not all) can't grasp that psychological ED is a thing. I had one member around my age try to convince me over the phone how I was physically suffering and I should start taking pde5 inhibitors etc.

In my case, I have mild ED due to a tight pelvic floor (manifesting as something called hard flaccid, not sure if people here have heard of it) but generally if my mind is in the right place I can still perform sexually on my own or with my partner, without drugs. So yes my cause is physical but worsened mentally.

That said, there is great support and advice for people here with physical ED.

[jump.ship]

Wrong forum to ask this question imo.

I've found most people on here (but not all) can't grasp that psychological ED is a thing. I had one member around my age try to convince me over the phone how I was physically suffering and I should start taking pde5 inhibitors etc.

In my case, I have mild ED due to a tight pelvic floor (manifesting as something called hard flaccid, not sure if people here have heard of it) but generally if my mind is in the right place I can still perform sexually on my own or with my partner, without drugs. So yes my cause is physical but worsened mentally.

That said, there is great support and advice for people here with physical ED.

I agree with this. There is a curious lack of interest in the psychological dimension on this forum. Like a repressed trauma complete with creative defense mechanisms to keep it in the dark. Haha.

In society to say "it's all in your head" is a synonym for "you have the control to sort this out". I am not a psychologist, but I do have a psychology degree, and I can tell you that the biological sciences are MUCH better at fixing issues than the psychological ones.

Moreover, if you have a physical issue, this will create a psychological layer on top in no time. You cannot totally separate the two.

For the original poster, it is all in your head most likely, that DOES NOT MEAN it will be easy to fix. BUT you are very lucky in that you are seeking help so early. I would say a psychologist would rub their hands together knowing that you are a candidate they can help.

When I see a psychologist after 20 years of this, they say they can help, but internally they are going "this guy is fucked".

PLEASE seek help NOW or you will be fucked and getting an implant in 20 years time as I am.

[Frank Talk Admin]

I have to strongly disagree - This is exactly the right forum for asking questions like this.
I am a sex therapist. I deal with all kinds of causes of ED. First, no one should ever, ever declare that they know the cause of ED. Unless they have had a complete physical and mental health workup, we don't know. It would be foolish to assume anything.
I fight against the typical doctor response to a young man that "It's all in your head." This is a stupid statement.
As most men realize, there is almost no space between a physical event and the mental impact. To assume a young man cannot have a physical issue with the symptom of ED is foolish. And to assume all ED is caused by a physical problem is equally foolish.
When it comes to ED, the entire patient has to be treated - not just his penis. Urologists are generally terrible at this (as are most doctors in western medicine).
I would definitely encourage the OP to go to his doctor to make sure everything is OK. And once physical causes are ruled out, we look for anxiety-based causes. We still treat the symptoms of ED while at the same time treating the primary cause - anxiety. Situational anxiety can come from lack of education and understanding, relationship issues, normal social insecurity, and a million other things. Ideally, a good team treats the symptoms AND the underlying cause. In many cases, we give the guy meds to help with erections to get him out of the death spiral. Once panic is over, we work on therapeutic issues (education, etc) to get him in a better place and then we taper off the meds.

Franktalk is for EVERY kind of ED and treatment - that's why I started it.
Paul

[jump.ship]

I do agree Paul. It's well known there has been widespread tendency to label any and all ED as psychological. Your mission, and this forums mission, to act as a corrective to this should happen and I support it.

This focus has, however, swung the vibe of the forum in a certain direction.

[Lost Sheep]

(edited for focus)

I would definitely encourage the OP to go to his doctor to make sure everything is OK. And once physical causes are ruled out, we look for anxiety-based causes. ...


Franktalk is for EVERY kind of ED and treatment - that's why I started it.
Paul

I feel compelled to point out that many general practitioners are not as qualified to evaluate physical causes of E.D. as they might be if they specialized in the study.

My own primary care physician remarked to me that I knew more about E.D. and its treatments than he did (this, as he was authorizing me to see a specialist/urologist).

It is incumbent on the patient to be the first medical care provider for oneself. From nutrition and exercise to fist aid to compiling and reporting of symptoms and assistance to the medical professionals in any way they can. I advise anyone, who has the capacity, to make themselves an integral part of their medical care team at all levels.

Also, I would like to point out that this is definitely NOT the wrong forum for any discussion on E.D. or even peripherally related subjects, so I heartily agree with Paul in disagreeing with verytempted1992's post . (When I first read it, I thought he MUST have misspoken.)

[jump.ship]

Also, I would like to point out that this is definitely NOT the wrong forum for any discussion on E.D. or even peripherally related subjects, so I heartily agree with Paul in disagreeing with verytempted1992's post . (When I first read it, I thought he MUST have misspoken.)

The point is being missed here. Two members are just pointing out they feel a cold reception to discussions of psychological ED on this forum, that is all.

[jump.ship]

It is incumbent on the patient to be the first medical care provider for oneself. From nutrition and exercise to fist aid to compiling and reporting of symptoms and assistance to the medical professionals in any way they can. I advise anyone, who has the capacity, to make themselves an integral part of their medical care team at all levels.

There is a catch 22 issue here though, if that is the right phrase. For the small subset of ED sufferers that have primary ED, that is, ED from day one, we are completely skewed how we are able to think and talk about our ED.

When Drs asked me "can you get an erection on some occasions" I always responded: "Yes" - which is true. And that is the end of the conversation. If I had, say, 10 years of my dick working correctly and then it started acting like it does now, then when the Dr asked me "Can you get an erection on some occasions", I would no doubt respond: "My erection is shit, help me!!!"

It's like a fish in water... they don't know they are in water. People with ED their whole life don't really know how their dick is supposed to work. They therefore need the objectivity of a well trained Dr in the field.

[verytempted1992]

Also, I would like to point out that this is definitely NOT the wrong forum for any discussion on E.D. or even peripherally related subjects, so I heartily agree with Paul in disagreeing with verytempted1992's post . (When I first read it, I thought he MUST have misspoken.)

The point is being missed here. Two members are just pointing out they feel a cold reception to discussions of psychological ED on this forum, that is all.

Exactly this.

Apologies for any offence I caused, but I stand by what I said although I could have worded it differently.

I still resent the fact I was asked for my phone number to be told how I need to take drugs when I don't even need them now (yet). How can you call that a positive response to minor physical/psychological ED?

Because hard flaccid isn't even known about on here, nobody will understand pelvic floor tightness is worsened by stress/anxiety. Paul, I do believe you made a reference to HF once to a member here but otherwise it's not discussed.

Anyway I don't want to hijack the post from the OP but hopefully my point can be appreciated