FrankTalk.org

Jeff

This should be an interesting subject for us E D guys. I think that after E D hits, it become incumbent on any guy to learn (1) the art of relaxing and (2) that being highly aroused is the best way to produce erections that will get the job done.

As men, we are our penises and if our penis is happy, we are happy men. We all want throbbing erections maxed out to steel like qualities and dimensions. Getting them like that in solo or in sex with our wives as we age and especially after E D, is a matter of stimulation, relaxation, and arousal. A wife who understands what we are experiencing in both heads is a great boon to our sexuality. That can only happen if we share our burdens with her and teach her how to help us. A problem shared in that department goes a long way to remaining sexually active. Our wives knowing what we are experiencing is a healing factor in lesser erections becoming stronger erections.

I am eager to see what other guys say in this area and hope that we will share transparently as nothing makes us feel more like men than a strong, steel like, throbbing erection.

Thanks Jeff and Paul for adding this to our index boards

Well said.

My thought when I saw the subject line: "That's what she said." Ha Ha

Greg
Baton Rouge

Hope this helps, Had ED and in recovery but I think it fools us, as I still have the odd bad week, but then this could just me, as we all have swings in our biorhythms, but these weeks I still get the most throbbing nocturnal erections that wake me up, and still get morning woods, so its a puzzle and a puzzling way to be.
But do love your part on the happy penis and can vouch for it, happy penis= happy man= an even happier wife, and with us being in our mid sixties its still nice to have a sex life and being a 3 to 4 times a week couple, ED was a big shock, so just read my post HERBS VERSUS DRUGS, HERBS MY CHOICE, its my way back to THROBBING ERECTION.
Good Luck

Ah, the zen of a throbbing hard on. So inscrutable. You hit the nail on the head when you spoke about learning how to relax. I am almost 2 years post prostatectomy and to tell the truth, I was having performance problems prior to surgery. Prior to my 50th birthday, performance was a non issue because it was guaranteed. Then, a few misses happened. The guarantee was broken, never to return. Doubt now ruled the roost. If a love making session could get to the climax without doubt entering the picture, all was well. However, doubt was intruding into my mind more and more as time went by. Then prostate cancer reared its ugly head. Forget about doubt, how about a limp dick with no inclination to get hard?

I have tried the pump, the pill, the shot (where does that needle go???!!!) and nothing felt like the real thing. Drugs induced a zombie penis that gets sorta hard but then lasts longer than its welcome, also without head involvement. Thigh banging, which I started on my own shortly after surgery showed me that orgasms were still possible. As time has gone by, semi erections grew out of thigh banging in conjunction with an orgasm. Now, thigh banging produces a fairly hard erection as a prelude and run up to orgasm. Now, the Viberect has been thrown into the mix. I have only used it two times so far and it has blown my mind each time. So far no erections until the runup to the climax.

So, I am hopeful for the future. It is teaching the body new tricks to try to bring a dead thing back to life. It has expanded our marital sex life to bring toys into the bedroom and focus more on her. Too bad we did not learn about toys much earlier.

Never in my life i've had one of those, so i can't really relate...
But i agree our general happiness depends a lot on the sexual health. With ED, it's hard to not feel bad, annoyed, sad etc.
And yes, having an understanding and compassionate partner who helps you out and stimulates you to keep going, even tho you are pissed with yourself, is very important. I don't think living would be possible otherwise, really.