FrankTalk.org

Had my appt with my urologist today about not being able to ejaculate about every third time of having sex. He said he sees over 100 men a week about my age with the same problem. He said that my wife and I wouldn't like his recommendation, which was to not have sex for two weeks to let my "refractory period" reset some. He reminded me that in my youth I could ejaculate 2 or 3 times a day if I wanted because my refractory period was very much shorter. But, due to age, my refractory period is now much longer. He said, after two weeks have sex and see if you can ejaculate. If so, start back slowly by having sex, only twice a week for a while, and if still ejaculating each time, stay at that level of sexual activity. Every so often try having sex another time a week to see if I still can ejaculate that additional time, too. If that doesn't work as well as expected, he will try cabergoline, but it's only about 30% effective, itself. Wife's not too happy about it, but I can still give her some manual or oral attention to help her needs.

We have made our peace with me not ejaculating vaginaly, now after 2 years after ramping down for a year. No refractory period seems to work. At first she was concerned and thought it was her but I assured her it was just me. We've altered refractory period, tried oxytocin, used nerve stimulator creams, am not taking any indicted and drugs, and tried welbutrin. I work it off later by hand with occasional increasing difficulty to keep the prostate cleaned out. And because of DE, we can now go until she is fully satisfied, usually 45-90 minutes when I get the white flag of sweet surrender. She half jokingly asks now, "where was this the last 50 years . . . " There is a big upside.