Stuck in a massive rut

[Tomtomtom28]

Tough time of year again

Sucks to be me

Mates sent me a picture taking the mick but hits home real hard

Saying:
Single
Talking
Dating

With a picture of me under single which is basically right

He only means it as a joke but it’s like I’m locked away scared to date due to Ed/performance anxiety takes over
Nearly gives me a panic attack and makes me feel really down

I’m nearly 37 and my penis has always let me down since 16 years old which takes a massive toll on mental health

The zest for dating has diminished
Libido has taken a massive dip (nearly nothing) as scared to date/have sex

I’ve somehow got to try and go on a date with Cialis 5mg in my system but I don’t have much hope

Would you recommend an escort every 2 weeks to see if I can build some confidence in that department ?

It just really makes me think about getting an implant and finally be free of the depression from all of this.
My life shouldn’t be like this at my age

All my friends are in ping relationships, have kids, I’m worried my mum will pass away and I’ll still be in the rut and with a strong person in my life gone will be so tough on my mental health

I have hobbies and great family and friends it’s just this that’s killing me silently

In January should I go to see dr Ralph in London and get a private consultation

Urologist
Which person do I go to see ?

Have a Doppler done and see from the results which step to take next

If they find a leak could the implant be done through the nhs ? I don’t know

I just want to move on it’s been 20 years of hurt basically so it’s getting a bit daft now

Hope you understand where I am coming from

I read a number of stories on here who just make the decision and get an implant as they are fed up with the unreliability of it all and it’s changed their lives for the better


They can start dating without worry

Cheers

[Martin6469]

Sounds like you need to get some new mates! I wouldn't put up with that merde!

Cialis maximum dose is 20mg. I would use that. That's the dose I used for some years, with good results.

You should see a urologist with experience in mens' sexual health, and get testosterone measured immediately, since low T causes depression. Then get a complete workup. I know NHS takes forever, so maybe you can afford a private doctor.

If your problem proves to be entirely psychological, escorts sound like a good idea. You received a post last summer from Lost Sheep who observed that women are usually sympathetic to guys with ED, and usually wish to be helpful. I thinks he's right.

I'm glad you looked into the sex surrogate idea - I think it's made for you, if you can somehow come up with the fee. (Ten thousand pounds seems to be about twice the fee here in US.)

[Hunchback]

I guess you have kinda made up your mind already mate - if it's killing you, go for the implant way and hope it all works out well!

Just some food for thought tho - i am not an expert, i've only been with three women in my life, including my wife... but i do believe pure sex is not what most women are looking for on their first dates, even second or more. You don't HAVE to fuck them asap. You can take a bit of time dating, getting close and explaining the situation. Any decent woman will understand it and try to work around it, help you with it and be nice. If she doesn't, she is not a decent woman and is not worth your time in the first place.
So, if the exact cause of your ED is not clear yet, there's a possibility it's mental-related or just "mild" ED that can be fixed with pills or injections, you might wonna take your time and look for a good partner to explore this with. Don't go on a date thinking only about sex and how you are gonna perform. You are not in highschool

First night i spent with my wife when we first started dating, it was a bit weird since i hadn't had the time to tell her about all my problems, it's a very complicated story we have... doesn't matter, point is i didn't say anything and didn't feel like bothering with injections since i wasn't sure at the time if she really wanted me or not. We ended up fooling around all night and in the end i ate her pussy to put her to sleep.
The next day we talked about it, she said she noticed i wasn't getting hard and she instantly knew i had a problem since any "normal" man would be hard AF fooling around, eating pussy all night... but she didn't say anything because she wanted to take a bit of time and see what's going on, what can be done etc. So we talked about it and all my other problems, i wanted to tell her everything there's to know so that there's no surprises down the road and she knows what she's getting into. She didn't flinch, not with ED nor with any of the rest... and believe me, i have some serious problems going on.
We've been together for 15 years now, have two kids and a very successful life.

So... not easy to find a nice person, but hell don't literally COCK block yourself just because of fear that you won't satisfy your partner. You might be missing out the chance of your life!

Good luck mate!

[Old Guy]

Hey don't be so down on yourself. ED is nothing to hide. If your knee stopped working you would go get it fixed, right?
Definitely go see a Men's sexual health urologist. They can run tests to see if there is a physical issue and offer you solutions to fix any problems. Life is too short to not be happy and fulfilled.