Why Some Men Won't Consider An Implant

[RickRed40]

Here's a copy of blog I wrote about my decision to get an implant, and my thoughts about what others have shared with me about their journey.

Even though I've been a Medical Social Worker I had no clue I'd been suffering from PTSD, short for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

How and why would I experience PTSD when I made a choice which would put an end to my suffering with erectile dysfunction? To say I was confused would be the understatement of the year.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can affect those who personally experience the catastrophe, those who witness it, and those who pick up the pieces afterwards. Receiving a dx of prostate cancer, coping with the loss of urinary control, & erectile dysfunction are catastrophic changes in the life of a man and in the life of a couple.

What are some of the symptoms?
* Re-experiencing the traumatic event
*Intrusive, upsetting memories of the event
*Flashbacks (acting or feeling like the event is happening again)
*Nightmares (either of the event or of other frightening things)
*Feelings of intense distress when reminded of the trauma
*Intense physical reactions to reminders of the event (e.g. pounding heart, rapid breathing, nausea, muscle tension, sweating)

Symptoms of PTSD: Avoidance and numbing
*Avoiding activities, places, thoughts, or feelings that remind you of the trauma
*Inability to remember important aspects of the trauma
*Loss of interest in activities and life in general
*Feeling detached from others and emotionally numb
*Sense of a limited future (you don’t expect to live a normal life span, get married, have a career)

Symptoms of PTSD: Increased anxiety and emotional arousal
*Difficulty falling or staying asleep
*Irritability or outbursts of anger
*Difficulty concentrating
*Hypervigilance (on constant “red alert”)
*Feeling jumpy and easily startled

After I scheduled myself for implant surgery I began to experience many of these symptoms. Especially trouble sleeping and a high level of anxiety. In addition, my wife and I saw a dramatic rise in irritability and fighting. We didn't understand what was happening in our marriage. We saw a counselor who confirmed both of us were suffering from PTSD. That took me by surprise. I was expecting to be restored by surgery, It was a choice I made and I was expecting a positive outcome. I didn't understand why these circumstances would bring about symptoms of PTSD.

For the last four years, there's only one thing that brought my wife and I into San Francisco, Every trip involved something to do with the diagnosis and treatment of prostate cancer. Pre surgery & post surgery visits as well as my unsuccessful penile rehab all took place in the city San Francisco. Receiving the news I'd be impotent for the rest of my life took place in San Francisco. Even though I was cured from cancer in San Francisco, my life was unalterably changed for the worst in that city as well. Now I was returning to UCSF in San Francisco once again, hoping for a positive life changing experience.

Our minds were locked into all the negative life changing events that happened as a result of our visits to San Francisco. Though we wanted to feel positive about the reasons why we were returning to San Francisco once again, we got stuck re-living the trauma of all that happened there in the last four years.

For many men it's not the return to a city that triggers PTSD, it's a return to ANY surgeon that triggers PTSD. That's the reason why I hear the following comments when I discuss the amazing restoration brought about by the implant procedure. Here's a sample of those comments:

"I"ll never go within a mile of another surgeon."
"There's no way I'll have another surgery."
"I won't let a surgeon touch me ever again."

The comments above are all expressions of a powerful desire to avoid any further surgery that's now associated with the devastating effects of erectile dysfunction. This avoidance that comes from PTSD is powerful and resistant to any form surgical treatment no matter how successful.

It's often worse for the men who've had double nerve sparing surgery, yet failed to re-gain their erectile dysfunction, In this situation issues of trust are involved. Many men with double nerve sparing surgery believe they've been lied to or betrayed, As a result, they've made a life long decision they'll never trust a surgeon again. That decision effectively sentences a man to a life time of misery coping with erectile dysfunction.

My point here is this, while penile implant surgery isn't for everyone, it's important to make this life altering decision based on the merits and risks involved in surgery rather than have the power of fear, the loss of trust,or avoidance that comes from PSTD make your decision for you. All too frequently, the resistance to penile implant surgery comes from PTSD, fear, or the lack of trust, rather than an objective analysis of whether this surgery could benefit you.

Penile Implant surgery has the highest success rate in treating ED. There's no other treatment of ED that has a higher user and partner satisfaction rate. I can say from personal experience that my implant restored what prostate cancer and surgery took away from me.

So don't let PTSD, fear, or the lack of knowledge determine your choice whether or not have implant surgery. Base your decision on the facts about penile implants.

[tomas1]

I suppose I'd go for it if my wife wanted it to happen. Otherwise, I'd probably have em up.

[maxkohn]

My girlfriend and I agree that I'm not going for an implant anytime soon. With my luck, I'll wake up a woman. LOL My last two surgeries (unrelated to ED) were nightmares filled with complications. So surgery is not an option at this time.

[ventura]

I had my Prostate removed 4 years ago. Have had several dates but no steady girlfriend. So I have not considered having the surgery unless I meet someone

[maxkohn]

I had my Prostate removed 4 years ago. Have had several dates but no steady girlfriend. So I have not considered having the surgery unless I meet someone

First, how old were you when you had your prostate removed? Secondly, unless you have a good reason, I would avoid implant surgery too. It's been three and a half years for me and I was 50 at the time.

[ventura]

Max, I was 54 when I had surgery. Now I just turned 58. Had a lot of dates. Easy now with the Internet. But have not met anybody that I wanted to go to the next level with . So I have not thought of surgery. As of now I am trying to get into a clinical trial for stem cell surgery for ED. New frontier for ED recovery. Will see what happens.

[spanzo]

I have heard they hurt like a M.F. for a month! no thanks.

If I were single and dating, I might endure the pain

[dg_moore]

I have heard they hurt like a M.F. for a month!

If it's on the internet it's bound to be true, right? Don't believe everything you read.

[DP5689]

I don't know, for young people it can be rough. Especially if you don't have much positive sexual experience before getting ED.

[maxkohn]

[quote="Iluvatar"]I don't know, for young people it can be rough. Especially if you don't have much positive sexual experience before getting ED.[/quote

Speaking as someone who had prostate cancer shortly after my 50th birthday and months later, had surgery to remove my prostate, it was VERY rough for me. In fact, so much went wrong, that they recorded my surgery on DVD to educate future surgeons for years to come. This surgery is part of the reason I'm in no rush for an implant surgery. You really have to be ready for it, you have to have a certain purpose for it and you have to be educated on what life will be like afterwards -- all before going for the implant. I'm nowhere near ready. Just sharing my experience.