A CANCER STORY

[bromeman]

I found myself in the living room of some friends surrounded by men. One of the men was off work and someone asked why. He replied, “I have prostate cancer”. The words were no sooner spoken when three other men began to share their stories about prostate cancer.
I recall making the observation that there was a time when none of us would dare mention anything about anything below the belt and here we were, I included, sharing the details of our journeys with a cancer that appears in 1 out of every 7 men. Prostate Cancer Canada estimates that 25,500 new cases would be diagnosed in 2011 and that there would be 4100 deaths.
All of us in that room were affected by one man with whom we all had a connection. He had just taken his retirement and was very happy that he had the 85 factor which meant that he was well under 65 years of age. However, he was experiencing times of un-well-ness....nothing specific except that he stood longer at urinals than most men and had the urge “to go” quite often. A friend called in a couple favors from an urologist and an examination quickly took place. The diagnosis was the dreadful words prostate cancer, too far advanced for any treatment. As a result of this one man’s death a growing number of men began to seek PSA testing. PSA is considered to be unrealiable and useless by some medical personnel because it reports too many false-positive results. A new test is being developed which is much simpler and hopefully totally reliable. Unlike mammograms, PSA is not always free of cost and I have heard men complain of being victims of discrimination. No man would decry the money raised for breast cancer; however, the Movember and Yellow Wrist Bands fund raising efforts for prostate cancer are overdue recognition of a cancer that affects men and for which they are now able to discuss and take action to address.
My physician was following my PSA results since I turned 40 because of my family history. I recalled the PSA test that made me be the same as the men visiting in the living room. The doctor failed to mark the box that indicated “a family history”. The clerk at the testing laboratory informed me that I would have to pay for the test. I indicated that I considered her request as unacceptable and asked to speak with her manager. The manager was a very pleasant woman who after some discussion and a review of previous tests granted me a free PSA. I soon learned that this was the one which made the doctor anxious. A biopsy was ordered which was not as bad as some had described it; in fact, I thanked the doctor for conducting a good biopsy but the results were alarming.
I was given 15 months of hormone therapy which made me to be at-one-with-menopausal-women – hot flashes, the sweats, hair loss, sleeplessness, and decreased libido. Further treatment was considered – some form of radiation. Not willing to be in Calgary for 8 weeks, it was determined that I was a suitable candidate for brachytherapy – the insertion of 47 bits of radioactive material into the prostate which would deplete in 22 months. I had to avoid holding babies, had inform health care workers (even the hairdresser/barber) about the radiation, and to be careful if flying.
Treatment of prostate cancer is constantly changing. There are numerous options depending on the stage of the cancer. Surgery or removal of the prostate with nerves being spared is still performed; radiation, hormone, chemo, and biologic therapies are available. Some men are treated with cryonic (freezing), highly intense ultrasound, proton beams, and some men elect to do nothing than follow a period watchful waiting. At my last check up I shared with the doctor some aches and pains wondering if the cancer was galloping through me. He listened, examined, and said, “Be thankful...you are alive!”
The diagnosed of prostate cancer calls for support, grieving, and to re-invest in life. While in hospital I made several attempts to find a social worker or chaplain but they were all invisible. I approached the local cancer society about a support group and a young lady told me that she did not know what I was talking about even though I recall giving a presentation to such a group that was known as Us Too. I did find an online men’s support group and a very helpful book Assume the Position by Richard K. Bercuson. (A local group is in the process of being formed.)
There are gains and losses with prostate cancer. The gains include a more normal lifestyle sometimes with the help of medication to relax the bladder (I am no longer the last man standing at a urinal). I can now go through the whole night without a night-time wandering to a washroom. However, there is a down side and I think William Shakespeare expressed it well: Is it not strange that desire should so many years outlive performance? (Henry IV, Part II) .
The use of erectile dysfunction medication is not always successful with prostate cancer. However, what is successful was well expressed to me by a doctor at the Tom Baker Cancer Clinic when he addressed my fears by stating you are alive. Being alive grants the prostate cancer patient the opportunity to re-invest in life. The experience of our friend whose life was cut short is poignantly expressed in the words of Michael Jackson.
Born to amuse, to inspire, to delight
Like a sunset
Gone too soon
Gone too soon…

[buckster]

You are right. The "male" stubborn silence has left us far behind the women and their breast cancer fight. It is very frustrating to me that the US wants to stop requiring insurance companies to pay for PSA screening. Seems like we're loosing ground. I am here today because I had a great family doctor that ordered PSA test on me at age 50. We are going to my wife's cousin's celebration of life today because his doctor didn't order test eventhough he had a high rate of cancer in his family history. Jimmy was only 52 years old. It is time we all stand up and join the prostate cancer fight.
Buck