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Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2022 3:52 pm
by sogwap
Any good online sex therapist, for couples recovering from ED?

In my case I've struggled with mild to moderate ED/PE for most of my life. A couple months ago I started taking Trimix with good results.
I can get erection in 10-15 minutes and last as long as needed or desired.

The problem is neither my wife nor I (both 60+) know how to handle my new powers in bed.
Three time since starting Trimix, sex ended badly and my wife wont talk to me.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2022 4:12 pm
by frank66665
sogwap wrote:Any good online sex therapist, for couples recovering from ED?

In my case I've struggled with mild to moderate ED/PE for most of my life. A couple months ago I started taking Trimix with good results.
I can get erection in 10-15 minutes and last as long as needed or desired.

The problem is neither my wife nor I (both 60+) know how to handle my new powers in bed.
Three time since starting Trimix, sex ended badly and my wife wont talk to me.

in what sense did it end badly ...

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2022 7:11 pm
by sogwap
frank66665 wrote:in what sense did it end badly ...

On my second injection, I missed the injection spot. Didn't even get a chubby. At that point 50% success.
Several weeks later we tried sex again, I made the mistake of stopping thrusting, not sure what would happen after ejaculation. She got upset.
We had sex several more times, things seemed ok.
Last week we had sex again, I tried several positions which were previously impossible due to my ED. They worked but my wife was not impressed. She stopped the sex and said that since I came rather quickly, that I lost my sexual energy. I said that we never talk about sex, until after things dont work. She said what's there to talk about since what we do (sexually) doesn't work. She hasn't talked to me since. :shock:

I feel like I'm learning how to have sex with a functioning Penis, where previously I struggled with various forms of ED/PE.
I feel like she wants sex without anything getting in the way or fear that it is not going to work.

Prior to using the injections earlier this year she stopped wanting sex, she couldn't deal things not working.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2022 7:33 pm
by Old Guy
Wow, sorry sogwap. If the wife ain't happy, well.... you know.

When I was using Trimix injections at first it worked well. Then failures either from a miss or not a strong enough dose. Very frustrating after getting all worked up. For both partners. Have to say I never tried anything out of the norm while using injections, just tried to pleasure the wife. We don't talk much about sex except while we're busy doing it.

Guess I have to say don't try to be a superman in bed. Take care of the wife first.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 12:08 am
by sogwap
Old Guy wrote:Have to say I never tried anything out of the norm while using injections, just tried to pleasure the wife. We don't talk much about sex except while we're busy doing it.

Guess I have to say don't try to be a superman in bed. Take care of the wife first.

I was simply trying to do things we did 5-10 years ago. But because of ED, couldn't do.

For the past 3 years with Viagra, I could usually have sex that was limited. We often started with me going down on her. Then using slow sex (limited thrusting) and a sideways position which was only position I could keep erection and we usually both could finish with her using vibrator. Problem is she found it boring and unconnected.

Recently I asked why she has not offered oral sex, she said it was because of my ED. I was either not hard, or I would come too quickly.

In the past we had trouble doing Woman on Top, her favorite position. However we havent tried it in over three years, again because of my ED. We tried it several week ago. I was hard enough because Trimix but unfortunately it felt quite uncomfortable like, it was being stuffed in her Vagina. I suspect she was not fully turned on or not wet enough. But because I know she loves that position I didnt dare try to talk about it. However she mentioned it up the other night and blamed me for not being turn on since I already came.

PS She gets very distraught when sex doesnt work, Before Trimix it was usually my ED,that kept things from working. But now with Trimix its like ED is still there, even though I'm fully hard. But anything that doesnt go as expected, shes let down and often gets upset.
The other night when she got upset, After 20+ minutes of no sex and stressful talking I said its still working and gently took her hand on my hard penis. Which would never have been possible even when I was 20. I dont know that may have contributed to her upsetness, since the sex is admittedly still awkward.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 6:35 am
by vajim1
Have you asked her if she would go to a sex therapist with you?
There is a forum for issues about cumming to quick.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 7:45 am
by FreddyFree
Maybe she was more happy when you had ED. She may be just having sex to please you and doesn’t really want to have sex anymore.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 8:11 am
by AnotherOldMan
Age: 66
trying to do things we did 5-10 years ago.


In our case, the ten years from 56 years to 66 years brought many changes to both of us. Those changes included physical changes. We have had to adapt in order to continue having sex.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 12:37 pm
by Martin6469
Couple of classic books which you might find useful:
For her: "The Joy of Sex," Alex Comfort, now in third edition (2009)
For you: "She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman," Ian Kerner. All about cunnilingus.
These are for all ages, but I'm sure there are many books about improving middle-age and older sex; look on Amazon.

I could give orgasms to almost all of my girlfriends by licking their clits. Whatever a penis can do, a tongue can do better.

Re: Sex Therapy for couples recovering from ED

Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2022 1:37 pm
by Old Guy
Oral is a great starter. Have to admit we don't do it much, but when we do it's great. And sex afterwards is awesome.

sogwap, it really sounds like you're on the way to an implant. If the wife likes to ride you, she can ride all night long if she wants. Wish my wife liked that position more, but age has changed that. Bad knees on her, bad back for me, so finding new ways to manage without making us hurt later has been a challenge.

I'd be more than willing to share some of our adjustments if you PM me.