FrankTalk.org

Hey guys, this is my first post on FT. I’ve been a member for a couple of years now just absorbing all the information I can and pretty much trying to accept my own situation and decide how to move forward with it.

So just a quick rundown of my situation. I’m 28 years old and have had ED for years now. Pretty much ever since I started being sexually active at the start of my 20s. I’m pretty sure I have a venous leak, and also mild Peyronie’s disease, which has led to some scar tissue at the base and middle of the penis (although I haven’t officially been diagnosed yet). I’m not sure why this happened, as I genuinely haven’t had an incident that could’ve caused/sparked it, and for this to happen at such a young age when your erections are meant to be at their best still puzzles me, but it is what it is at this point and I’ve accepted it.

On some very rare occasions, I could have OK sex, but for the majority of times when I’ve been intimate with a girl, the erection is just too weak, and after not long I lose it completely, even when I’m completely mentally stimulated and turned on. This happened to me with a few different girls in my early/mid 20s, and after the last time when I was around 24/25, I just completely retreated within myself and stopped meeting new girls. Since then I haven’t tried to be intimate with anybody as I’ve been too scared to get in that situation with a girl and not be able to have sex with them. It’s just a horrible experience to go through again for me and for the girl, and is pretty emasculating.

To be honest, I’ve been too embarrassed to deal with this situation and have just ignored it and avoided dealing with it for years, but I’m getting older now and am realising that I can’t waste much more time and live like this. I’m almost 29 and my quality of life because of this issue has drastically gone down hill and has led me to live a pretty depressive lifestyle where I avoid interactions with the opposite sex and any potential relationships, which I obviously want. I’ve pretty much wasted my entire 20s when it comes to having a sex life, and I know that I need to get a move on and finally address the dick issues that I’m having.

I have a stag-do next week and it’s pretty much definitely going to involve having sex. I’ve tried viagra before and it didn’t have much of an effect - it kept me semi-erect but the erection is still too weak to have enjoyable sex for me and the girl. And any time any real pressure is applied to the penis, like even wearing a condom, the erection feels like it’s even weaker.

This is an issue that I know I’m going to have to deal with properly once I’m back from the stag-do. I’m going to stop being weak and just bite the bullet and deal with the embarrassment. I’ve made a promise to myself to book in with a specialist by the start of June and deal with this properly.

But for now, in the extreme short term, I was wondering if anybody on here can recommend me a VED device that I could order online that could potentially help me for next week and hopefully moving forward. I know this is not a long-term fix, but I believe trying a VED device could help me in the short term to have at least a few minutes of enjoyable penetration. I don’t mind the price or the website, I’d just love to try a pump that could help me to get at least a semi-decent erection for a few minutes.

I’ve listened to podcasts, read up on different forums and looked into loads of different devices, and have found what look like some good ones that I’ve shortlisted, but I was wondering if any kind FT user who perhaps has or has had similar issues to my own could recommend me a device that worked best for them. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but maybe it gave you a firm enough erection to engage in enjoyable sex again, even if it wasn’t for too long.

It would be much much appreciated to get a solid recommendation from the horses mouth before I make my order, which I need to do super soon. I just want to give the device a try and just feel more comfortable ordering one that worked for another guy who’s in or been in a similar situation to me. If it works for a few minutes - great. If it doesn’t, at least I tried.

Thanks so much for reading a pretty long-winded post, and for any potential replies. This is a great community and it’s great that this site prevents so many men like myself from suffering in silence.

i reccomend u go to ur urologist if you do decide to go the ved route.

he will show u how to use it safely

i tried ved but i stil dont know how it works properly

I am not in anyway an expert but I use a soma erect pump it's a medical grade VED as I get it on prescription it work well after a lot of trial and error it works for me and gets me hard enough for sex it is not cheap to buy any cheap pump will get you hard in the cylinder but if you do have a venous leak you will need to use tension rings

I should also say be very careful not to put too much pressure on your penis and tension rings can only be used for a maximum of 30 minutes

Unhappy60 wrote:I am not in anyway an expert but I use a soma erect pump it's a medical grade VED as I get it on prescription it work well after a lot of trial and error it works for me and gets me hard enough for sex it is not cheap to buy any cheap pump will get you hard in the cylinder but if you do have a venous leak you will need to use tension rings

Thanks - the SOMA pump was the one I was looking at because of the positive reviews and the rings for the venous leak. Thanks for the recommendation man

hankthefrank wrote:i reccomend u go to ur urologist if you do decide to go the ved route.

he will show u how to use it safely

i tried ved but i stil dont know how it works properly

I am going to see a urologist at the start of next month

I've tried several different brands of VEDs and Rings - for me the Osbon ErecAid system works best. I particularly like the shape of the rings (pressure point locations) and the ring loader. However, whatever system you decide to use you need to experiment with the ring sizes. Assuming that you plan o n using rings. From the description of you problem you should probably use ring/s - using the pump only will probably not provide an erection to last long enough for PIV> The size of the ErecAid rings will probably scare you as then appear pretty small. But with plenty of lube and flaccid they will come off when finished. With any VED System, pay close attention to the time (30 minutes) max) that the ring/s are in place and do not over pump. I pump until it fells a little uncomfortable and then back of a tad. If your pump has a gauge pay attention to the pressure. I place the rings on the pump, and lubricate the inside, in advance so I'm ready when needed. I then quickly lubricate myself and then pump up. When erection is about right, I place the ring/s and remove the pump. Lose maybe a minute so the feeling is not lost. I also suggest, as difficult or embarrassing as it might be, that you discuss the use of the pump with your partner. That was you'll be more relaxed and enjoy it more. Good luck....