How do I explain this?

[Gordon]

I not only tell if the subject comes up which it doesn’t very often but I’ll show it if needed. Nothing to worry about hiding. Has never been a problem.

[Gt1956]

Why worry about a "story"? Look at all of the women that have breast implants. Are they expected to explain them the first time they get with a new guy?? The intimate details about your life come later. If asked, then tell. Until it's important enough to them to inquire. I don't think an explanation is required. Just be honest if asked.

[merrix]

I was implanted on Oct 18. So far the pain has been manageable (with the help of some lovely little pills) and other than a few moments of panic that I’ve ruined my penis beyond the damaged that had naturally occurred through 20+ years of ED all has been great. I’ve actually enjoyed the time off from work and in a busy house with three school age children it’s nice to be the one getting taken care of for a few days (unlike my new robo-erection I’m aware this will never last).

My question is about explaining my new addition to my anatomy. Specifically I ‘enjoy’ male grooming and get waxed ‘down there’ every 8-10 weeks. The time will soon come when my lovely esthetician Amanda will be waxing my balls and will discover I’ve grown a third. What do I tell her? I’m pretty sure she will notice and I’m not sure given the unicorn aspect of our fellowship that she’s ever encountered this before.

I have a similar but less anxious question about how and if I tell my close friends. We gather in a few weeks for our annual Vegas weekend which includes an afternoon at the hotel spa. I’ve told one of them I had the procedure. I’m guessing as discreet as I’ve asked him to be it might come up. I’m warming to the idea of telling them but I still feel some shame and embarrassment. I know its unfounded and that many if not all of them are on some form of hydraulic enhancement but still how did you discuss your new ‘abilities’ with your buddies (if at all)?

Thanks for reading. This is my first post and it’s therapeutic just to be able to express these fears and questions; looking forward to your answers.

This is a very fair question. I had exactly the same question before my implant. And if you are anything like me, basically all the "answers" below won't do you any good at all.
Simply becayse what is answered below is not your question. What is answered is the question "Is this something to be embarassed about?".
Your queston is how do you explain this. And you're telling us that you think there would be some embarassment when telling friends and your waxing lady. So would most people I think. Some don't, we see that in the replies to your post. Some people are not embarassed at all, and that's great for them. But you are, and many are. To some degree.

Comparing it to an arm prosthesis is in my opinion completely irrelevant. There is a reason people feel ED is a more embarassing issue than an arm problem.
Also, saying that nobody asks a woman about her breast implants is wrong of course. (Some) women go through a lot of stress when having breast implants. Just the same questions as you have. What will their friends say when they see me in bikini next time? What will my kids' teacher think, neighbours, colleagues - will they think I am just a stupid, beauty-focused blonde with no brains? So it is a fair comparison, but I think (as a man) that a dick implant is another step on that scale, because for us it is not only aesthetics, it is about function. On the other hand, our dicks are not nearly as often on display as women's tits.


I have written about this in the past. My story, when needing one when someone has felt the pump in my scrotum: "Don't worry, I had an injury in the past and needed surgery. Everything works fine, don't worry about it, just keep going". Or something similar. Has never resulted in further questions. If so, you could always just answer "Sorry, I really don't want to talk about it, ok?" and that would most likely shut the most curious person up as well.

As for buddies, I never told anybody. Some have seen my dick before and after, and it is a pretty big difference. It is about 50% longer now when flaccid than before. On the other hand, my Titan hangs as straight down as any dick, so nobody will ever mistake it for a semi.
I don't spend much time naked with buddies though, so I doubt somebody reflected about the size change. Maybe, maby not. But nobody said anything and neither did I. If someone would say something, I'd just joke it off. "Yeah, I can give you a few tips on supplements and exercises if you want. You seem to need it", or whatever.

I think there are two ways to go with the telling your friends issue, and maybe in general as well.
Either you are just totally open with the whole thing. You just tell them "Hey guys, I got something to tell you. My crap dick stopped working a few XXX ago due to XXX. I got sick and tired of it and got implanted. It's the best F-ing thing I ever did. I can fuck for hours whenenver I want and no girl can feel the difference between my original dick and this one.".
There could of course be some banter, but so what. In the "tell the world" strategy, that's part of the game.
I haven't gone this route myself, but could easily do so actually. Maybe some time in the future.

The other way is to be discrete about it and just respond as needed. As my example above with the "I had an injury..." comment.

The third, worst way, which I think should be avoided, is the embarassed, hide it at any cost, strategy. That is the guy who puts all his efforts in hiding his implant, to the level where it prevents him from enjoying it to the fullest.
Let's say a guy hooks up with a woman for the night. They end up at her place, he discretely pumps up in the shower before sex, tells her he doesn't like oral sex (to avoid her feeling the pump), fucks her once (not twice because he wants to look "normal" as in having his dick go down after orgasm), and then excuses himself and goes home. He would have loved to stay the night, fuck her again before going to sleep, and then another round when waking up.
But because he is afraid she might jump him when she wakes up, or wake him up touching his dick/balls, he doesn't want to take the risk and goes home.
Or the guy who is in for a great weekend in Vegas, but stays home with a lame excuse because he is afraid his buddies will see his changed dick.
That's sort of counters the purpose of the implant. Which was to enjoy life, be proud of one's dick again, have as much good sex as possible, and enjoy the fact that as implanted, there are actually things we can do that "normal" dicks can't. So make use of it.

I hope this was worth reading and that it contributed to your thought process around this.
Good luck.

[Bumble]

I've shared with a number of friends and family and they have been supportive and ask questions about their own ED issues.
overall great experience. As we age things happen, breast, prostate, knees, hips, shoulders, ca. my dick doesn't work, and i fixed it. next question. like i said overall great experience.

[zandro]

My question is about explaining my new addition to my anatomy. Specifically I ‘enjoy’ male grooming and get waxed ‘down there’ every 8-10 weeks. The time will soon come when my lovely esthetician Amanda will be waxing my balls and will discover I’ve grown a third. What do I tell her? I’m pretty sure she will notice and I’m not sure given the unicorn aspect of our fellowship that she’s ever encountered this before.

I have a similar but less anxious question about how and if I tell my close friends. We gather in a few weeks for our annual Vegas weekend which includes an afternoon at the hotel spa.

Indirect solution for the esthetician, Amazon sells a few wax pots and tons of types of wax beads, I've been waxing myself for years and honestly prefer it to someone else doing it, in all probability you and your wife will end up giving each other pamper time in this regard eventually, it definitely beats the price of going out for a wax too

As for the friends, they will really only notice if they fondle you there, and I can totally see the fun in that so if that's the case I guess tell them, but if there's not going to be any physical contact there's no reason to tell them anything

Regardless I'd expect them to be more interested / curios than somehow put off

[zandro]

I was thinking along these lines as fessing up. I am recently divorced and found I had PCa gleason 8 during. Treated in May and divorced in August. It's been 5months since treatment and no defined erections. It seems I'll need an implant. Doing this alone is difficult. So I was wondering do you tell a new partner or someone your dating upfront?

A female partner is unlikely to notice, women (in general) don't like to play with a man's scrotum, male partners like to fondle and you may want to fess up, it can be as easy as "it's just from a medical procedure I had "

[Greg1956]

Greg1956, I would suggest that a penis implant is different than a missing limb. To me it is more like the literally thousands of people that you see wearing a wrist/knee/ankle brace. You have your limb, it just needs a little something to help it be useful.

I was just trying to make the point that you do what you can to correct any adversity and there is no shame in doing what you can to become the best version of yourself.

[David_R]

I never talk about the details of my penis (or how it works or doesn't work) with my friends. Maybe I'm just a little uncomfortable being that open about private stuff.

[gene308]

What a great question. I am workingi at changing my attitude about tbe IPP. For the longest time my ED made me feel like I was defective, a malfunction, broken, impotent. I felt tbe implant was a fix for my problem

I now see the implant as a wonderful enhancement I am better than i was before.

The thing I love most about my implant is it allows me to be guiltlessly selfish . For many years i would struggle to ensure that my wife would get happy ending first. I no longer need to worry about that. In our lovemaking I can now be free of that concern knowing I can satisfy her no matter what. I call that an enhancement

[Lost Sheep]

I disclosed on a dating site that I was very close to impotent (let's call severe terminal E.D. what it is) even before I got an implant.

Women responded positively to me as courageous (their word, not mine). They seemed to respond VERY positively to a man who intends to address a problem head-on. Even more so to a man who did so successfully.

Being in denial seems not to be an attractant. Being confidently forward-moving seems as if it is.

I think a man with the line, "Yeah, I used to be impotent, but I am all better now!" (A line inspired by "The Addams Family" tv show from '64-'66, John Astin, as Gomez Adams).

Such a line is bound to intrigue an approachable woman, I think. But I would not OPEN with it.