My Journal

[strongagain]

Me too

[merrix]

Hardness... I thought I would elaborate a bit on this subject, here goes...

In the beginning, I never inflated fully for sex. It felt uncomfortable both for myself and for my wife. For me, it was about blood flow mostly I think. I just felt that my glans did not get properly filled with blood, and neither did my shaft. My whole penis just felt unnatural when inflating too hard.
For my wife, it was roughly the same story. She thought it felt too hard and unnatural. She also noticed the shaft was more oval when pumped to a higher degree. For her it was to some degree position dependant. Imagine a cylinder and a rod. As long as the rod entered at the perfect angle and always moved in and out at the right angle, the hardness was no issue.
But if the rod entered at an angle compared to the cylinder, so that the rod would press against one side at the entrance of the cylinder and then touch the other side of the bottom of the cylinder - then she thought it was uncomfortable. But even at the perfect angle, rod and cylinder aligned, she still thought it was preferable with a lower degree of inflation/hardness.
This was 4-5 years ago. About 2-3 years ago, I started to gradually increase the level of inflation for sex. I did this mostly as an experiment to start with. And it went well. I still got the same great blood flow to my glans, and still same for the shaft. Sex felt better for me. Hard to describe why, but partly I think it is just a mental thing. It just feels great to fuck with a super hard dick. I asked my wife now and then if it was too hard, but she said no. So I kept increasing the hardness. Still got even better for me, and she did not think anything got worse.
She thought my glans was still hard, which serves as a "cushion" and she thought my shaft was rounder than when fully inflated in the earlier days. So all ok for her.
I kept increasing the level, and for the last 6-12 months or so, I have been inflating to the maximum for sex. This is about 60-70 pumps, of course with a decreasing amount of fluid for each pump. The last few pumps barely push any saline into my dick and eventually I cannot pump anymore. I need 2 hands and full force to get to this level.
The only downside I found with this level was oral. Definitely preferred a much lower degree of pumping for that.
What I normally did was to inflate to the "oral level" first, and then when time came for penetration, I'd inflate more.
Then a couple of times I never bothered to inflate much more before penetration. And realized I kind of liked intercourse at the lower level as well.

So I took the time to discuss this issue thoroughly with my wife. And here is what she has to say.
First of all, she notices no real difference in blood level between the two. My glans and shaft fills up nicely at both inflation levels.
Her preference... well she can't say. It depends.
First of all, she says that the most natural hardness is definitely the "oral level". In short, what that means that when I inflate my dick to what I refer to as “oral level”, it feels like the dicks of the guys she had sex with before she met me. That’s what hides behind her saying that it feels natural.
When I inflate to the maximum, my dick is much harder than a natural dick she says. So if I translate that, it means my fully inflated dick is much harder than the dicks of the guys she had sex with before she met me. That was 25 years ago, and we are talking about half a dozen guys in their twenties.

And what is my “oral level”? Basically it is the level I can reach with one hand. If I keep pumping with one hand till I just can’t do anymore, that is the oral level. If I switch to two hands and keep pumping till I can’t pump anymore, I can do at least 20 more. Of course, the last ones of those 20 add barely anything, and then I just cannot get any more fluid in to my dick.
The difference between the maximum hardness and the oral level is mostly in the flex level at the base of the dick, and only slightly in the hardness of the shaft. That is also what my wife claims is the major factor in what makes my hardness natural or not – the level of base flex. My oral level dick has some flex at the base. It can be “redirected” up, down and sideways to some extent. Up to my belly, and some way down below 90 degrees, but not much. My fully inflated dick cannot. It cannot be bent up to touch my belly. And it cannot be bent down below 90 degrees (or 3 o’clock to use the clock analogy).

What’s her preference?
It depends. It depends on what kind of sex she is up for. Ideally, she wants me to inflate to the maximum. She says she loves the hardness, it just makes her feel more. I can use the hardness and lack of base flex to exert pressure inside her vagina. And to the walls just at the entrance. It means she feels like she is being filled up to a larger extent. She can simply feel my dick inside her to a higher degree. Basically the same as the rod and cylinder thing above. Only then it was uncomfortable, now she thinks it feels great. Why? My only 2 cents: I have better blood flow at full inflation now than in the beginning. Theory supported by her not thinking my fully inflated dick feels oval anymore either.
But – this increased feeling of being filled up (or well fucked perhaps) comes at a price. If we go on for long, the price is discomfort and if it keeps going for a very long time, the price is pain. I guess it goes hand in hand with the unnatural hardness. Her vagina is not designed for being fucked by a dick with no flex. No woman’s vagina is I suppose.
So her preference is basically a short, intense, hard fuck with maximum inflation. That lets her enjoy the feeling of a super hard dick filling her up and just lets her feel more. But it cannot go on for too long.
The other option is a somewhat softer dick, the natural oral level, and keep going for longer. Then she sacrifices the supernatural hardness (and supernatural pleasure) for longer duration. Swapping quality for quantity so to say…
Her preference is the former, but since variation is key for a good sex life, she prefers a mix of both. Sometimes short and intense - being rough fucked with a super hard dick for a shorter time. And sometimes being fucked with a “normal dick” for longer time in several different positions etc.

For myself, what do I prefer? Well, I basically agree with my wife. I love the super hard dick, the fully inflated ridiculously unnaturally hard dick. It gives me some cave-man pleasure in knowing that my wife feels like she is being run over by a train. Sort of. At least being fucked by dick which is harder than anything she ever felt before. Which makes her feel more filled up than ever before. But just like for her, this hardness is made for short intense fucking. Not for an hour-long grinding. That will cause some kind of discomfort as time goes by for me as well.
The oral level, or the natural level, is better made for longer sessions. Swapping positions, even swapping between vaginal and oral. The natural level works for everything and for as long as we want to go on. No limits. I lose the feeling of ramming her with something she has never experienced before, but I gain the keys to another implant advantage – the ability to keep going on forever. And to be super creative. Swapping positions, swapping rooms, taking breaks to go and get massage oil, drinks, whatever the fuck you need. My dick will keep standing and never surrender.
Two great options provided by my Titan, and I enjoy both. So does my wife.

And finally, I will post a pic below of my wife and myself. Only for the reason of making it easier for those interested to make a choice whether me and my story is something to identify with. And to get an understanding for who my wife is. An old hag at 200 pounds or a twenty year old? Judge for yourself. First pic is 2-3 years old. Beach in Malaysia. Last two pics are about one year old, taken at a holiday in Vietnam. She is my age.

Take care boys.

We.jpg (193.19 KiB) Viewed 2444 times

Me&She.jpg (908.94 KiB) Viewed 2444 times

[Lost Sheep]

haha merrix is probably the most useful member of this blog. I mean, who in this world can understand german...
thanks dude

Another German can.

True enough, but Merrix took the time and trouble to translate and transcribe. For that, my hat is off to him. (Of course, maybe the time he took was just an excuse to watch the video )

[thereishope]

Merrix... i was never expecting you posting such pictures... it's been quite the time since you updated the thread from those pictures you took on "bending your penis all the way backwards". It really shows no bulge at all. That's so cool.

Hat's off to you man.....

[LeRoastBeef]

You're an inspiration Merrix. Thanks for all you do here.
You're doing bloody well for 41.... she's doing better though!

[merrix]

Another question worth answering here instead of in PM

Hi, I just saw your latest post and I was wondering how long your penis is and what is the flaccid state like?
Dr. XX recommends Titan for me but I prefer LGX because of good flaccid state. I have just a 5.5" long penis and 4.5" girth. Don't you think it's too average for Titan? I was thinking that perhaps Titan is more suitable for those who have greater length or girth.
The thing that bothers me is the semi-erect flaccid state of the Titan. How will I hide it when wearing jeans pants? How do you hide it well? Also is it not uncomfortable when sitting on a small airplane seat?

First of all, I think I have described my flaccid state, my current and previous length in detail in this thread several times.
Seriously, I think good advice to anybody considering an implant is reading this thread from the first page till the last. That will take an hour or two maybe, but if you are going to put in some plastic tubes in your dick, I think it could be worth spending a few hours doing research.
Why should you read this thread: Firstly because I expose myself completely. This is a complete, thorough, honest account of my experience of getting implanted. Covering the decision process, the physical healing, the mental aspects, my sex life and how it changed, and so on. I think I describe most if not all aspects of getting implanted. Of course, it is all from my point of view, but that's all I can do. I think I dare to say that this journal is like nothing else out there on the web.

Secondly, I think I have gained some knowledge about this whole thing during the years. As a person I am the type of guy who goes all in to what I have at hand. Not that anybody should take my words for the one and only truth, but at least as a base which can be double checked if not trusted.

Thirdly, as many people have commented on my posts, there are not only my experience and knowledge in this thread. I agree with some and disagree with some of all the comments, but that doesn't mean that I would like some of the comments to not be there. The whole point for anyone reading is to see different views and the debate that sometimes occur as a result thereof.

So read this journal, if you spend time here on FT to learn about implants, and don't read this journal from start to finish, I seriously don't think you are even trying to inform yourself well enough to make a good decision.

But I will answer your question anyway.

I always thought my dick was average. Before surgery I had a 10 cm (4") long flaccid and a 16-16.5 cm (6.3-6.5#) long erection. My girth was about 14 cm (5.5").
Now my dick is about 15 cm (6") flaccid and 17.5 cm (6.9") erect. Girth is about 14.3 cm (5.6").

My flaccid has several pictures in this thread. Look for yourself.
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=600
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=570
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=440. The post I did on April 16 2018 with the pics is by the way directed to young men. Worth reading maybe.
I would say my flaccid hangs very naturally. It is very pliable and can be tucked anyway I want in my underwear. Sideways, straight down or whatever. I don't have any issues with any bulge in my pants, even though I wear tight clothes most of the time. Suit pants, jeans, shorts, etc.
My flaccid never causes me any problems in daily life. Flights? I do about 100 flights per year (yes, insane, I know). Or at least I did before Corona shut all travelling down. It was a bit uncomfortable for the first few months. But after that, no issue whatsoever.
I do all activities I want. Which is lifting weights (pretty heavy basic barbell exercises), playing tennis, and doing some boxing.
I did play football (soccer for you americans) as young. I was a least to say a combative central defender who went furiously into every challenge and ran over people as often as I got a chance. I must say that I think I would not have been 100% comfortable of doing that with my implant. I think I would just be afraid to get a blow to my crotch and hurt something. But maybe that is the 40+ version of me talking... When I was 25 I might have had a different risk management style...

Are you too average? I don't know. I think there are general and logically motivated advantages of the Titan vs AMS as I wrote in the post you refer to.
This one: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=15717&p=140425#p140425
But of course, I have no way of knowing what your outcome would be.
Again, just using logic, the shorter the penis is, the more of a problem it gets with sturdier cylinders. The shorter the penis, the less length and weight to overcome the stiffness of the cylinders and weigh it down, make it hang.
But I don't think this is the one and only issue deciding a Titan flaccid. As I wrote in that post, the doc has to do his part. E.g. making sure the reservoir does not lose its full capacity due to scar tissue if he leaves the dick partly inflated for too long after surgery.
So I have no way of saying what your flaccid will be like. And hence I am not going to recommend you anything.
All I say is that it is utter BS that all Titans will have poor flaccid look. See my pics.
Getting an AMS is no guarantee for a perfect flaccid either. There are plenty of posts on FT with descriptions of semi-erect deflated AMS as well.
Confirming what I say that the flaccid look is not only determined by the implant type, but also by the doctor installing the implant.
But the smaller the penis is, I think it is fair to say that the more speaks in favour of AMS if a natural hang of your flaccid is important.

I think a lot of the bad rep of the Titan's flaccid here on FT is just created by bitter people who just find it easier to vent their frustration on the implant model itself than on the shitty doc who should have made sure they got a good result. Either he fucked up installing the Titan and controlling the whole process afterwards (including avoiding losing reservoir capacity), or he installed the wrong implant in the wrong dick. But blame that loser instead of the implant brand. Because obviously and evidently a Titan can give people a great flaccid when installed, managed and chosen competently.
The implant is easier to blame because then they blame something that was out of their control. They didn't chose the implant, but they did choose the doctor...
A good doctor would be able to say what the flaccid will look like. A good doc would have informed about that and discussed with his patient what implant to choose. A good doc wouldn't just put someone to sleep and let him wake up with a shitty flaccid. A good doc would not say "your flaccid will be fine" and then it turns out it isn't.
If he did, blame him, not the implant.

[indusvalley]

I am almost 7 weeks out an not happy with my flacid state either. I decided on the titan because my surgeon said it was what I needed given the presurgical length he measured (24 cm). I was enthusiastic about it also because I was told of the likelihood of gaining between 1 to 2 cm in girth over a year or more and was told the cylinders soften up over time- I had already read on FT that by 6 months they soften up and people have reported 2 cm gains in girth. I got 2 other opinions before committing, both centers of excellence listed, one in manhattan and another in upstate NY. Both only used titans. One, who came across as really sharp and does some pretty involved surgery (modified sliding technique for lengthening) said the AMS was too floppy. Only after I got home post surgery, with a lot of time on my hands, did I read of others 16 months and 3+ years out still complaining of the rigid titan cylinders. This put me in a really bad place thinking I made a bad choice and should have insisted on the cx or lgx. Right now I know it is too early to tell if the pain with sitting, sleeping and walking will go away and if I will be ever be able to resume my normal activities of biking, exercising, tying shoes etc.

Let me put forth another possibility about the varying degree of flaccid hang and softness among titan implantees. This is not so much a theory, but a worry with some common sense to back it up. Aside from absorption of fats by the cylinders, what if the girth of the tunica is another factor in softening up of the titan cylinders. It may be necessary for the titan's bioflex material stretch and relax in order for it to become flexible enough for a soft, natural hang. If a persons tunica is more than 21 mm(for the titan 22 cm) then each cycle will allow the bioflex material to stretch and relax. If ,however, the tunica is under 21mm, the tunica will limit the inflation of the cylinders before the bioflex material has a chance to stretch. So with each cycle you are inflating, but not stretching the cylinders. Use this comparison: imagine one of those long balloons used to make animal sculptures but without the ability to grow in length. Lets say the balloon uninflated is 10mm in circumference with the ability to inflate to over 30mm(titan is tunica dependent and should inflate until it bursts if unconfined). Now if you inflate and deflate the balloon to 20 mm, stretching the balloon material (whatever it is, latex, rubber) 500+ times (say 3 times a day for 6 months), guaranteed the deflated balloon is going to be much softer and pliable then when you first began. If, however, the same balloon was inflated and deflated within the confines of a 8mm pvc pipe the balloon material would never be stretched and would it remain basically as stiff as if you had never inflated it? My girth is 4.5 midshaft fully inflated and I can tell the cylinders are not stretched. BTW I had a beautiful install, completely straight,tips in perfect position, scar not visible and no bruising. My only issue is with the device and I realize I cant make final judgment on that at this time. Any feedback? Any guys with girth that cycled and dont have an acceptable flacid; any thin guys that that have a great flaccid.?

This is by far the best theory related to Titan flaccid hang. Not sure how it got missed out. Hey iRide, how is your implant’s flaccid hang now? Did it get better? Did your girth increase over time?

[indusvalley]

Another question worth answering here instead of in PM

Hi, I just saw your latest post and I was wondering how long your penis is and what is the flaccid state like?
Dr. XX recommends Titan for me but I prefer LGX because of good flaccid state. I have just a 5.5" long penis and 4.5" girth. Don't you think it's too average for Titan? I was thinking that perhaps Titan is more suitable for those who have greater length or girth.
The thing that bothers me is the semi-erect flaccid state of the Titan. How will I hide it when wearing jeans pants? How do you hide it well? Also is it not uncomfortable when sitting on a small airplane seat?

First of all, I think I have described my flaccid state, my current and previous length in detail in this thread several times.
Seriously, I think good advice to anybody considering an implant is reading this thread from the first page till the last. That will take an hour or two maybe, but if you are going to put in some plastic tubes in your dick, I think it could be worth spending a few hours doing research.
Why should you read this thread: Firstly because I expose myself completely. This is a complete, thorough, honest account of my experience of getting implanted. Covering the decision process, the physical healing, the mental aspects, my sex life and how it changed, and so on. I think I describe most if not all aspects of getting implanted. Of course, it is all from my point of view, but that's all I can do. I think I dare to say that this journal is like nothing else out there on the web.

Secondly, I think I have gained some knowledge about this whole thing during the years. As a person I am the type of guy who goes all in to what I have at hand. Not that anybody should take my words for the one and only truth, but at least as a base which can be double checked if not trusted.

Thirdly, as many people have commented on my posts, there are not only my experience and knowledge in this thread. I agree with some and disagree with some of all the comments, but that doesn't mean that I would like some of the comments to not be there. The whole point for anyone reading is to see different views and the debate that sometimes occur as a result thereof.

So read this journal, if you spend time here on FT to learn about implants, and don't read this journal from start to finish, I seriously don't think you are even trying to inform yourself well enough to make a good decision.

But I will answer your question anyway.

I always thought my dick was average. Before surgery I had a 10 cm (4") long flaccid and a 16-16.5 cm (6.3-6.5#) long erection. My girth was about 14 cm (5.5").
Now my dick is about 15 cm (6") flaccid and 17.5 cm (6.9") erect. Girth is about 14.3 cm (5.6").

My flaccid has several pictures in this thread. Look for yourself.
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=600
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=570
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010&start=440. The post I did on April 16 2018 with the pics is by the way directed to young men. Worth reading maybe.
I would say my flaccid hangs very naturally. It is very pliable and can be tucked anyway I want in my underwear. Sideways, straight down or whatever. I don't have any issues with any bulge in my pants, even though I wear tight clothes most of the time. Suit pants, jeans, shorts, etc.
My flaccid never causes me any problems in daily life. Flights? I do about 100 flights per year (yes, insane, I know). Or at least I did before Corona shut all travelling down. It was a bit uncomfortable for the first few months. But after that, no issue whatsoever.
I do all activities I want. Which is lifting weights (pretty heavy basic barbell exercises), playing tennis, and doing some boxing.
I did play football (soccer for you americans) as young. I was a least to say a combative central defender who went furiously into every challenge and ran over people as often as I got a chance. I must say that I think I would not have been 100% comfortable of doing that with my implant. I think I would just be afraid to get a blow to my crotch and hurt something. But maybe that is the 40+ version of me talking... When I was 25 I might have had a different risk management style...

Are you too average? I don't know. I think there are general and logically motivated advantages of the Titan vs AMS as I wrote in the post you refer to.
This one: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=15717&p=140425#p140425
But of course, I have no way of knowing what your outcome would be.
Again, just using logic, the shorter the penis is, the more of a problem it gets with sturdier cylinders. The shorter the penis, the less length and weight to overcome the stiffness of the cylinders and weigh it down, make it hang.
But I don't think this is the one and only issue deciding a Titan flaccid. As I wrote in that post, the doc has to do his part. E.g. making sure the reservoir does not lose its full capacity due to scar tissue if he leaves the dick partly inflated for too long after surgery.
So I have no way of saying what your flaccid will be like. And hence I am not going to recommend you anything.
All I say is that it is utter BS that all Titans will have poor flaccid look. See my pics.
Getting an AMS is no guarantee for a perfect flaccid either. There are plenty of posts on FT with descriptions of semi-erect deflated AMS as well.
Confirming what I say that the flaccid look is not only determined by the implant type, but also by the doctor installing the implant.
But the smaller the penis is, I think it is fair to say that the more speaks in favour of AMS if a natural hang of your flaccid is important.

I think a lot of the bad rep of the Titan's flaccid here on FT is just created by bitter people who just find it easier to vent their frustration on the implant model itself than on the shitty doc who should have made sure they got a good result. Either he fucked up installing the Titan and controlling the whole process afterwards (including avoiding losing reservoir capacity), or he installed the wrong implant in the wrong dick. But blame that loser instead of the implant brand. Because obviously and evidently a Titan can give people a great flaccid when installed, managed and chosen competently.
The implant is easier to blame because then they blame something that was out of their control. They didn't chose the implant, but they did choose the doctor...
A good doctor would be able to say what the flaccid will look like. A good doc would have informed about that and discussed with his patient what implant to choose. A good doc wouldn't just put someone to sleep and let him wake up with a shitty flaccid. A good doc would not say "your flaccid will be fine" and then it turns out it isn't.
If he did, blame him, not the implant.

Thank you! I really appreciate this in-depth response. I actually just finished reading the whole thread and it took me 2 days but it was totally worth it. You did a fantastic job sharing your experience. I juggled between the decision of getting either AMS or Coloplast but two different doctors, both experienced, recommended Coloplast so I am going to go with that. I am only 32 years old, what do I have to lose? If I don’t like it, I can always use a different brand 10 years from now when it is time for revision. But it would be stupid to not go with Doctors recommendation. The important thing is to have a rock solid erection and a happy wife. Everything else can be adjusted and one can get used to it.

[LookingUp]

"The important thing is to have a rock solid erection and a happy wife. Everything else can be adjusted and one can get used to it."

Straight forward, Honest observation.

Maybe age has a lot to do with this decision. More experiences. Some worked out great, some halfway and some disappointing. Concern of the last 2 outcomes with my favorite Toy.

Thank to all for the honesty on this forum.

LUp

[pilot74]

Hey merrix,

I am having an implant scheduled in December with Dr. Eid

Just spent close to 4 hours going through this thread. I can't even begin to describe how useful this information is to me. Just wanted to say thank you for posting all this.

Cheers