Unable to ejaculate

[GaryRN]

On June 5, I was cleared by the surgeon for sex. She inflated and deflated the pump and said it was a go. The next day, my wife and I tried to have intercourse, but her vagina has atrophied over 4 years, and it was too painful for her to have sex.

OK, the next day I tried to masturbate and at least once daily since. I am unable to ejaculate. I get going and almost make it, then it is like a switch is flipped to OFF.
I called my surgeon the other day and her was replies were: "Sometimes this happens." "Sometimes it takes longer to get things working."
Personally , I am dissatisfied with those answers. I am not sure what to do next. I wrote an email to the surgeon who actually did the surgery, and have not heard back yet.

In the meantime I have been reading about prostate massage. Maybe that would get the juices flowing again. I did some research on the net. I can get my middle finger up the anus and feel the prostate, but am unable to do the deed. I even looked on AMazon and ordered a prostate massager with a built in vibrator. It got here in 2 days. I was shocked at the size of it-abut the size of an erect penis. I was unable to return it (even unsused) because their return policy these kind of orders can't be returned.
So, since I am part Scot, I tried it. I lubed it up well with KY and the thing actually fit. The anus expands fairly well. I tried it for 5 minutes and nothing. I removed it. I told my wife, and she said she would help me the next day. I got on my knees and bent over and the thing was inserted and she flipped the switch. We stayed for 15 minutes without success. No prostate orgasm. So this was a dead end as well.

I did call my endocrine doc and spoke with her Nurse Practitioner. She consulted another urologist and he thinks I may have micro-abcesses in the prostate which need treated. Also prostate massage might help done by a physician. I will run all of this past my urological surgeon when he answers my email back. Also I do have an appt with him in Sept. I do have an appt with my endocrine doc on July 14. I am sure we will talk about this, but I am not sure she would want to do the prostate massage.
SO I am trying to cover all of my bases here.

SO far, since my implant, I have had 3 adverse outcomes:
(1) Grapefruit sized edema x 3 weeks
(2) 2 bad UTI's
(3) Inability to ejaculate

Any ideas or similar experiences bro's ?

Thanks, Gary

[Steven1111]

Hi Gary,

I'm so sorry to hear of your difficulties in achieving an orgasm. I'm in the same boat, tho I know my issue is caused by the huge dose of morphine I take every day for a chronic pain condition and it lessens my sensitivity. You must have something else going on and I don't know what it is. But I empathize with you over the lack of being able to cum. It usually takes me a couple of weeks to "recharge" but this time it's taking longer and I'm frustrated, as you are.

I'm sorry the vibrator didn't work, especially as I'm the one who suggested you try a dildo in one of your posts on this awhile back. I'm glad you had the balls to try it. Good for you. I'll ask a stupid question, but I'm wondering if you were masturbating while you had the vibrator in? I've only had pure prostate-only orgasms a few times in my life when I've been receiving anal sex. Usually it's been necessary to also masturbate myself in order to cum. Did you do that? I assume you did but just in case you didn't then try it again and do that too. And it might also help if your wife actually moves the vibrator in and out of you so it stimulates the prostate more strongly by rubbing against it. It may help you. Also, you may need more than 15 minutes to do it. I dunno but it's worth a try. Just a couple of tips for you in the art of anal massage from a gay supporter..

Good luck to you and I hope you find out what's going on with you soon.
All the best,
Steve

[nuguy2]

I had not been able to ejaculate from intercourse prior to surgery but got my hopes up now. At 13 days after surgery I am gushing pre cum if I watch a little porn ..... think it has something to do with
walking around all this time with a magnificent hard on ... haw

[GaryRN]

I have not tried to masturbate with the vibrator on the prostate. The next time I will try that.
That for the info.
Gary

[GaryRN]

OK-success today with masturbation and orgasm.
My wife and I can't have intercourse at this time due to the fact that her vagina is not is shape yet.
We tried once after I was cleared for sex on June 5. We tried the next day, but she was too sore.
So since then I have been trying to masturbate and have an orgasm without success until today.
Thank God for that. Now I am hopeful that when my wife's vagina is up to par, we can resume a somewhat
normal sex life.

I guess things take time.

[Steven1111]

Hey Gary,

Congratulations! I know this means a lot to you and I'm happy for you. I was also lucky one day last week finally. I wish us both better luck in the future.

Yes these things do take time it seems...

best to you,
Steve

[ditchman]

Gary,

I had the same problem you are having at right about the same time post-op. Hang in there. Be patient, ask your wife to work through it with you. Based on my experience, things will gradually get better and you will regain sensation and ejaculation as normal. The nerves around the implant incision are still numb many weeks after the operation. Even when your doc gives the go-ahead on intercourse, that does not mean your incision is fully healed, and it won't be for several months.

Look up some of my posts back in April 2013 and you will see the panic I was in at the 6-7 weeks post-op mark. But, my wife and I worked through it, kept trying, and as I reached the 7-9 weeks mark, things were rapidly getting back to normal, and I was able to ejaculate regularly.

At 4 months post-op this week, I am as normal as clockwork.

I am wishing you all the best. Hang in there. It will improve with time. Lots of guys on here for support.

Ditch

[GaryRN]

Things are better I have had 6 orgasms since June 6. I have had 2 massive great wonderful superb orgasms this past week, My length is better. My wife is undergoing vaginal rehab, so we hope for sex together soon.'Thanks, Gary