What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

The final frontier. Deciding when, if and how.
drayan123
Posts: 88
Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2022 2:50 pm

What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby drayan123 » Tue Sep 19, 2023 9:30 am

Hey guys I’m gonna be going to a different state if I get the procedure done but I live with my parents and my little siblings so there’s no way I’ll be coming back to my state inflated until my doctor deflates me . What should I tell them ? And also do I have to be book a hotel for a whole month untill my doctor deflates me ?

Musson
Posts: 414
Joined: Wed Nov 17, 2021 12:59 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby Musson » Tue Sep 19, 2023 11:41 am

Why can’t you tell your parents? The truth is usually the best policy but I’m not judging at all as I understand the right to medical privacy. I certainly will not be telling friends and colleagues as there is no need for them to know anything about an intimate medical procedure be it hemorrhoids or an implant
63yr old. PDwith 40% dor. Curve. Pre-PD 7”x6”.lost 2 in. due to PD. ED prior to PD. Switched from Sildalifil to Trimix Nov 2023 . Currently titrating Trimix for optimization.

strunza501
Posts: 45
Joined: Mon Sep 19, 2022 12:10 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby strunza501 » Tue Sep 19, 2023 1:02 pm

When I was young , I didn’t tell anyone. Now 34 yrs later , I’m having problems with it, now everyone knows cause the word got out. Tell your parents. As for me, cousins, family, friends etc all found out from being in a small community. Look down the road when u will need a revision. Don’t do like I did.

Bent Ben
Posts: 151
Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2023 4:21 am

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby Bent Ben » Tue Sep 19, 2023 1:21 pm

Tell your dad, start with “Pop thanks for the great genetics”! :P

Id tell my folks if they were with us. I told my older sister who I am close to. My younger sister is a flake and a sociopath so I didnt tell her… lol

I stayed the week at a VRBO near the hospital which was a good decision in my mind. I am inflated, Im having some complications so I cant deflate although some doctors leave their patients inflated for weeks after, I guess it depends on multiple factors. If you are not in pain you might ask your doctor if you can position your erection in a manner that it doesnt show. Like straight up against the belly.
51yo, ED 5 years, 45-50° curve/PD. 22cm Titan, IP with no RTE by Dr Hakky on 9/12/2023.
My comments, suggestions, ideas or routines are for entertainment and satirical purposes only. Do not use any of my ideas, suggestions, routines or advice.

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str84wd
Posts: 73
Joined: Thu Aug 10, 2023 5:05 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby str84wd » Tue Sep 19, 2023 1:27 pm

drayan123 wrote:Hey guys I’m gonna be going to a different state if I get the procedure done but I live with my parents and my little siblings so there’s no way I’ll be coming back to my state inflated until my doctor deflates me . What should I tell them ? And also do I have to be book a hotel for a whole month untill my doctor deflates me ?


I'm five weeks post op and still Inflated! So it's not always guaranteed your bulge can be hidden if you are not wearing tight pants
Last edited by str84wd on Tue Sep 19, 2023 6:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
45y/o, Implanted 19 August 2023, Titan 19cm, +1 RTE & 125ml reservoir

Gt1956
Posts: 3043
Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2019 2:47 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby Gt1956 » Tue Sep 19, 2023 4:52 pm

In my case. I've been retired for a few years. We keep a condo out of state. On day 2 my catheter was removed & my wife drove us to the condo. My appointment with the nurse that does all of the inflation/deflation help was actually on day 10. That is just how they have their work week divided up. Drove home on day 9 to be on time for the day 10 appointment. "Class" was ok. I had already been nudging the pump down. Nurse was a pro at finding the release button. I had a little more trouble cause there was just enough swelling to disguise the button. But I did get it to release by just sliding my finger over it. No need to actually press it if your in a hurry. My instruction paper gave me a weekly timeline as to inflation. I did go back to the nurse two more times to get progress tips & make sure everything was going well. Those 2 extra trips weren't really needed but helped my confidence. I stayed home & wife went back to the condo. I drove to her for the 6 week celebration.
No family knew. My daughter did comment when she saw me wearing sweat pants cause I never did. Just told her that I thought I'd give them a try. Then later said I wasn't happy with them & went back to jeans.
Living with family adds some potential complications. Can you cover your surgery by saying that you want to visit or hike somewhere? That way if you have a rougher recovery than planned you can say that the hike wore you out or maybe you tripped & fell/sprained a leg.
Honestly, my daughter saw me at less than the 2 week point. She only noticed the sweatpants. Might of said I got out of a chair slowly. I just said that I'm not getting any younger. A jock strap with a wash cloth rolled up under my penis kept me upright even deflated. I was very dedicated to staying as vertical as possible. Baggy sweat pants covered it fine. My dr's plan is to be deflated, only inflating for increasing times during the recovery.
The dynamics in your blended home might be different & you're younger.
My best advice is to gather up what you think you might need. Save the receipts to return what you don't use. I never used the portable urinal. Traveling, the gas station urinals were good enough. At the condo I could bend forward & point my ass backwards well enough to hit the toilet. Just watch the first stream & quickly adjust if its too close to the bowls rim. I always do lift the seat to pee.
Do a few dress rehersals in your room at home to decide what wardrobe combinations work the best. Adjust what you wear before the surgery. Planning is better before than after.
Long post, I hope that you can pick a few good tips out of it. It really isn't very hard to blend into friends & family. You can hide in your bedroom & tell your family that you're binge watching a series online. The excuses are almost endless.
68yo, HBP at 40, high triglycerides at 45. Phimosis at 57. Type 2 at 60. Dr. William Brant May 1, 2023 CX 21cm w/no rte's penoscrotal 6" girth @ 6 months

Alex258
Posts: 198
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2023 8:17 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby Alex258 » Tue Sep 19, 2023 7:57 pm

I shared about mine. Nothing to be ashamed of etc. If anyone had an opinion I could care less. Everyone should be happy for you. You know How it goes with judgmental peeps if thats who and what they are. GL to ya and enjoy!!!

portageriver
Posts: 118
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2022 1:50 pm

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby portageriver » Tue Sep 19, 2023 8:56 pm

drayan123 wrote:Hey guys I’m gonna be going to a different state if I get the procedure done but I live with my parents and my little siblings so there’s no way I’ll be coming back to my state inflated until my doctor deflates me . What should I tell them ? And also do I have to be book a hotel for a whole month untill my doctor deflates me ?



I trust you have your reasons for keeping it quiet, as I had mine. Only my wife and kids know about my cancer and subsequent implant - no one outside that circle other than a few close buddies.

I told my extended family I had hernia surgery and needed to lay low following the procedure. I was blessed in that I had my wife to look after me for a couple of days and we lived in our own home. My kids knew, but they were both out of the house when I had my surgery.

I was up and about after just a couple of days but I understand your dilemma living at home with your family. I don't know what to tell you about the hotel situation. If you search this forum for "what should I tell my employer" or something similar you will find threads answering this question. Hernia surgery is a common one but there are others. Good luck brother!
Age 55, Ohio - Implant AMS 700 LGX, 21+ 3 following RAP for prostate cancer (Gleason 6). Implanted June 2021 and loving it!

Txagq8
Posts: 885
Joined: Tue Oct 01, 2019 4:41 pm
Location: Texas Hill Country

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby Txagq8 » Tue Sep 19, 2023 10:06 pm

This is going to sound weird, but I’m not sure my wife knows that I have an implant.

She knew about the ED. Actually, she was in the urologists office with me with them trying to say it was “all in my head” until she gave them a step-by-step account of what happened during sex, almost every time, and they scheduled me for a full work up.

Back then there was no viagra, so it wasn’t as simple as a prescription and out the door.

She listened after the negative results from my University of Kansas med school work up around 1999-2000 when they gave me the bad news that i had a future of injections to look forward to….venous ligations and surgeries to improve arterial flow weren’t proving very effective.


She knew I wasn’t thrilled with the situation by 2015 but was supportive and sympathetic. So when I started talking to doctors about an implant I just told her that they might be able to intervene surgically.

So I scheduled the surgery when I knew she was going to be out of town after the Christmas holidays visiting some relatives from her side of family. I called her the day before and said I had a surgery appointment. She wanted to come home but I shut it down, told her it was too minor a procedure to mess up her trip, that they might even do it under local anesthesia.

I survived on my own at the house just fine, although a 6 month border collie pup was not much help. By the time she got back I was well on my way to healing.

So….she knows the ED got fixed. Does she know it’s an implant instead of vascular? I have no idea. We are both much happier I don’t have to mess with injections. I’m pretty discrete but am willing to walk around with an erection for an hour or two when I’m planning on getting lucky. I’ve even got it down to where I can pee and pump at same time.

So I dunno. I’m not hiding anything. I just haven’t told everything I know. I suspect she is less interested in how it got fixed and more interested in the fact that it is fixed.

A revision is s bridge I’ll burn when I get there.
Age 68. Physically fit educated red neck in Texas. Very married. 23 cm (18+5) of LGX installed by Dr. Bryan Kansas 12/31/2019. I fought the ED and my wife & I won. I’m either full of shit or sound advice. You decide which.

oldbeek
Posts: 2547
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:46 pm
Location: Los Angeles area

Re: What should I tell my family ? And should I stay in a hotel ?

Postby oldbeek » Wed Sep 20, 2023 1:16 am

drayan123 wrote:Hey guys I’m gonna be going to a different state if I get the procedure done but I live with my parents and my little siblings so there’s no way I’ll be coming back to my state inflated until my doctor deflates me . What should I tell them ? And also do I have to be book a hotel for a whole month untill my doctor deflates me ?
.
How young are your little siblings? They are teaching them about anal sex in the 5th grade now. A dick that is broken and needs fixed should not be out of bounds. My grand sons needed a chaperone for a basketball tournament in Las Vegas. Grandpa took them with a 80% erection. To be comfortable I wore silky basket ball shorts that hide nothing. The batchorlette party group in the next suite over from us had fun giggling about the old man with the everlasting boner when we would cross paths in the hallway. My grandsons just had fun with the whole affair.
82, good health, RP 7-2017, all nerves taken , PSA 0.05, 4-18,, .07 1/19,.05 4/19, .03 11-21, .04 11-23, implanted 4-1-18, Infra-pubic, AMS lgx 15 cm with 5cm rte. Implant at USC Keck. Dr Boyd and Dr Loh Doyle 6.5 x 5, 800 AUS 7-21-20


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