LBC2020 wrote:So guys
If your wife gave you an ultimatum
Basically saying I’m not sure I’ll be able
To accept the implant
And I’m not sure how I’ll feel
Would you still get it?
My mental health isn’t good at all and I’ve started some Meds but the cause is my ED
and I’m hoping with it gone forever that part of me returns
That confident sexual part
I think I know what you are all going to say but just wondering...
Do we do this for ourselves or our partners?
As I read your rendition of what your wife told you
I’m not sure I’ll be able
To accept the implant
And I’m not sure how I’ll feel
I hear, loud and clear, on her part, fear.
What she is afraid of, I don't know.
A: As wunhunglo posted, the chance you will cheat on her might be her concern.
B: Some women fear that the implanted penis will not feel "real" - essentially a dildo installed in her man.
C: Some women might have gotten accustomed to the sexual situation as it is, and fear a sudden change in the relationship dynamics or the nature of sexual activities
D: Some women might fear resuming sex - perhaps never enjoyed sex in the first place but put up with it (even pretending to enjoy it). I note that when Viagra first came out, some women lamented, "Oh no, I thought we were all done with that stuff."
E: She is concerned about the cost.
F: Some other cause I have not thought of.
All the above, to some extent, should be (must be) addressed in frank conversation as Waynetho suggested and wunhunglo stated explicitly. I do not suggest just showing her the inflation process or inflated penises unless she is the rare woman who is aroused visually.
Assurance that you find her desirable and want to resume sex with her as an expression of that desire might go a long way to getting her on board. Assuring her that it is only her that you desire, but that your lack of erectile function has weighed on your self-image and diminished your happiness with yourself is likely to get her nurturing side to support you.
What sorts of things did you do to seduce your wife in the years you were "functional"? What sorts of things did you do to seduce your wife as you lost erectile function? (These are rhetorical question which you should not feel compelled to answer here, but simply ask yourself so you remine yourself what sort of things give your wife incentive to restore your penis to its normal function.)
Remind your wife (or tell her) that an implanted penis is still a penis,
YOUR penis. And very likely to be indistinguishable from the penis of your youth.