Another mid-30’s implant journal
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2022 7:33 pm
I’m 35 and have been suffering ED since becoming sexually active. I had some trauma to my penis from a motorcycle accident at 19, but I healed and my diagnosis was psychological origin, though Cialis definitely helped. Effectiveness for me has diminished in recent years, and now all it does is give me a headache.
Regardless of cause, the end result is the same: my dick doesn’t work, and with my last 5 or more hookups I had no serviceable erection, or one that lasted only minutes, or only with my partner on top. You’re all familiar with the embarrassment, and that fear of whether I’ll be able to get it up and keep it up has colored every sexual encounter I’ve had my entire life.
I looked into an implant 5 years ago, but was hesitant to go down an irreversible surgical path, especially because I had read accounts of losing size. So in addition to the pharmaceuticals I tried everything else: getting in shape to deal with body insecurity, lots of cardio to help with blood flow, hypnosis, testosterone replacement therapy to go from low-average to high-average.
Well, none of it worked, and in December I finally had that moment of clarity: despite all efforts, my ED has only gotten worse and will not improve with age. I’m faced with 3 possible paths forward:
1. No implant, dick doesn’t work
2. Implant fails, dick doesn’t work
3. Implant succeeds, dick works
The only path with a positive outcome is the implant, so my decision was easy. I did a video consult with Dr. Clavell in December, and a month later I’m in Houston for surgery tomorrow. I’ll stay here for a few days to rest and ice before flying home on Saturday.
I know the recovery can be long and uncomfortable. I know that if I’m lucky enough to live an average lifespan I’ll have this surgery another half-dozen times or more. But I have no doubt that I’m making the right choice, and I hope to be in the 95% of patients who are satisfied with their implant. I feel confident in my decision, eager to put my dating anxieties behind me, and nervous about complications — all simultaneously, somehow.
I greatly appreciate the information shared on FT by members of all ages, and I found the journals from members in my age range to be particularly helpful at giving me the reassurance to finally pursue an implant at a younger age than most. I don’t have the writing stamina to match Merrix’s wealth of journaling, but I will try to keep a log of the meaningful milestones for the next few months as another resource for those young(ish) men doing research like I was.
Regardless of cause, the end result is the same: my dick doesn’t work, and with my last 5 or more hookups I had no serviceable erection, or one that lasted only minutes, or only with my partner on top. You’re all familiar with the embarrassment, and that fear of whether I’ll be able to get it up and keep it up has colored every sexual encounter I’ve had my entire life.
I looked into an implant 5 years ago, but was hesitant to go down an irreversible surgical path, especially because I had read accounts of losing size. So in addition to the pharmaceuticals I tried everything else: getting in shape to deal with body insecurity, lots of cardio to help with blood flow, hypnosis, testosterone replacement therapy to go from low-average to high-average.
Well, none of it worked, and in December I finally had that moment of clarity: despite all efforts, my ED has only gotten worse and will not improve with age. I’m faced with 3 possible paths forward:
1. No implant, dick doesn’t work
2. Implant fails, dick doesn’t work
3. Implant succeeds, dick works
The only path with a positive outcome is the implant, so my decision was easy. I did a video consult with Dr. Clavell in December, and a month later I’m in Houston for surgery tomorrow. I’ll stay here for a few days to rest and ice before flying home on Saturday.
I know the recovery can be long and uncomfortable. I know that if I’m lucky enough to live an average lifespan I’ll have this surgery another half-dozen times or more. But I have no doubt that I’m making the right choice, and I hope to be in the 95% of patients who are satisfied with their implant. I feel confident in my decision, eager to put my dating anxieties behind me, and nervous about complications — all simultaneously, somehow.
I greatly appreciate the information shared on FT by members of all ages, and I found the journals from members in my age range to be particularly helpful at giving me the reassurance to finally pursue an implant at a younger age than most. I don’t have the writing stamina to match Merrix’s wealth of journaling, but I will try to keep a log of the meaningful milestones for the next few months as another resource for those young(ish) men doing research like I was.