FrankTalk.org

hey all,

I’ve been lurking and reading posts on this forum for several months now but never posted or commented my story. I have never been able to get a full erection, and never been able to maintain a 70-80% erection for more than a few seconds since hitting puberty. I barely get morning wood, if I do it isn’t fully hard and lasts a few seconds. I never got random boners you’re supposed to get as a teenager. When I was a teenager I didn’t think much of it and thought maybe I jerked off too much or that it would work properly when I had sex but that was not the case. I didn’t know then but it’s apparent I was born with severe venous leakage. And I guess I was in denial.

I’m fit and healthy, I play sport and workout regularly, I’ve never smoked or done drugs, I’m not depressed (unless being miserable about this), no medical conditions or problems, and I’ve never had any injuries or sexual trauma. It took some convincing a urologist that my GP referred and he caved and got me a Doppler test where the injection did not give me an erection whatsoever.

The effect this has had on me all my life can’t be surmised in sentences. To be born essentially impotent has taken an extreme metal toll on me. It’s hard to not feel like a ‘man’ and to not feel worthless or inferior at times. It’s hard not be wrought with jealously and anger at every mention of sex, especially as a teenager/young adult.

As you can imagine I avoided sexual experiences for most of my life out of embarrassment and anxiousness - how can you make a girl understand a 20 year old has severe ED? I remained a virgin until after getting prescriptions for viagra and Cialis I decided to pay escorts between 2021-2022 to test the pills efficacy with the addition of a cock ring, to test if i could have sex.

To sum it up, even with the combination of a tight cock ring and 20mg Cialis I couldn’t. While 20mg cialis improves my erection and makes it last a little longer, it’s still not hard enough for proper sex, and only lasts several seconds. My dick would just not be hard enough to penetrate, it would shrink/deflate upon being pressed against the girl’s vagina, no matter how turned on I was. Sometimes it could be forced in and I could thrust for a little but this was not at a full erection. It was quite pathetic and after wasting thousands from several failed sessions I stopped and started the process of getting an implant.

After a consult with Dr Malone and go ahead to get the implant this year I’ve also put myself out there and started dating, and having ‘real’ sex. I have been seeing a girl for about a month that I really like, and we’ve had sex a few times. Outside the awkwardness of putting on a cock ring and the headaches/red face/runny nose cialis gives me I can actually somewhat have sex. I can do doggy (easiest when standing) and sometimes missionary but any other position just can’t get it in. While it is limiting I enjoy it and so does she. I also had a fwb a couple months ago where the sex was the same and she enjoyed it as well.

As aforementioned, I’ve been scheduled to get my implant by Dr Malone in brisbane, Australia. He was kind and empathetic to my situation, and is a very respected high volume surgeon, one of the best in the country. From what I’ve heard his other patients seem to be happy with him. I’m not worried about my choice of surgeon.

I guess I’m just getting increasingly more scared as the date grows closer. I struggle with my own thoughts, when I consulted with Dr Malone I was under the impression sex was a near impossibility and now that I’ve discovered I can have it, albeit limited, maybe I’ve misrepresented the situation to him. And could it be worth just having the limited sex I can have now instead of the complications and risks that may arise from the implant?

Being only 23, the amount of revisions I need will be way over what is generally needed, and the risk of infection. But is it worth accepting those risks in the face of no real other alternative? Is it better to focus on enjoying my sex life now in my youth at risk of comprising my future years peace, health and comfort ability? I guess I’m just looking for reassurance that I’m making the right choice, I’m terrified of removing the ability to get natural blood flow/erections for the rest of my life, even if mine are stunted. I’m afraid of the implant breaking, or it causing me discomfort or pain that eventually outweigh the pros of getting it. I thought it was expected to last 10 years but finding out it can be faulty much quicker is distressing. Im also worried about loss of length but from what I understand that is largely from men who lost erectile length due to not having erections for a period of time, with me getting erections this shouldn’t be a problem Im hoping.

But then I see all the positive stories and experiences that are posted on this forum and I am reminded of why I chose to get this done in the first place.

After learning all the info would you recommend I still go through with the implant at my age? Should I be content with the sex I can currently have? Is it worth getting just so the absolute misery and mental anguish and sexual frustration I’ve experienced all my life will disappear?

Thank you for reading, it was good to write everything down and I hope if any younger guys in my boat are reading they can feel heard, because I’ve always felt so alone with my struggle in this.

Although I'm no young guy, the intimate relations with a partner should not cause anxiety. Sex is a beautiful thing, having to struggle when there is a solution just doesn't make sense.
Since you've been lurking FT you have obviously seen all the good comments guys have about their implant. Yes there are many posts complaining about failures, infections, etc. Just remember it is human nature to complain rather than give compliments. FT is full of posts with guys who have had issues. There are probably a hundred thousand men out there who are implanted and never said anything about it. Once you have a working dick you're more likely to be using it than talking about it.
Best of luck finding the answer you are seeking.

Hi Geralt1305
I am also scheduled for surgery with DR Malone next month on September 13 and I am getting the Coloplast Titan Implanted. As mentioned, Dr Malone is a brilliant surgeon and his bedside manner is top-notch, he took the time to listen to me and what was going on with me. I’m way older than you are, but sex is an essential part of my life, and I am guessing it is the same with most of us males. I underwent radical prostatectomy for cancer in March of this year and have had zero erections since the surgery. For my own peace of mind and mental health, I have decided to head down the path of being implanted. Not worrying about if I am going to get an erection or maintain it will be a thing of the past, as I know I will be able to get an erection and maintaining said erection is no longer going to be a problem. No more planning sex and worrying bout sticking a needle into my dick or waiting for pills and the injections to work or if they work. I will feel like a man again. Yes, there are some horror stories out there but, as Old Guy mentioned there are thousands of men out there who are more than happy with their implants, and younger blokes such as yourself who are happy, they went down this path. I personally think the positives more than outweigh the negatives, but the decision to get an implant is only yours to make and what you want from life and what you feel comfortable with.
I wish you all the best mate, feel free to PM me if you want to chat and let us know how you went.

Before finding FT, I talked to a friend of my nephew who had your exact problem. He was married at 24 and managed to have 2 children. His marriage was having problems created by his ED. To make a long story short, he said he wished he had done it at 20. He got his implant at 34.

Old Guy wrote:Although I'm no young guy, the intimate relations with a partner should not cause anxiety. Sex is a beautiful thing, having to struggle when there is a solution just doesn't make sense.
Since you've been lurking FT you have obviously seen all the good comments guys have about their implant. Yes there are many posts complaining about failures, infections, etc. Just remember it is human nature to complain rather than give compliments. FT is full of posts with guys who have had issues. There are probably a hundred thousand men out there who are implanted and never said anything about it. Once you have a working dick you're more likely to be using it than talking about it.
Best of luck finding the answer you are seeking.

Thank you for your comment and your insight

BundyBear wrote:Hi Geralt1305
I am also scheduled for surgery with DR Malone next month on September 13 and I am getting the Coloplast Titan Implanted. As mentioned, Dr Malone is a brilliant surgeon and his bedside manner is top-notch, he took the time to listen to me and what was going on with me. I’m way older than you are, but sex is an essential part of my life, and I am guessing it is the same with most of us males. I underwent radical prostatectomy for cancer in March of this year and have had zero erections since the surgery. For my own peace of mind and mental health, I have decided to head down the path of being implanted. Not worrying about if I am going to get an erection or maintain it will be a thing of the past, as I know I will be able to get an erection and maintaining said erection is no longer going to be a problem. No more planning sex and worrying bout sticking a needle into my dick or waiting for pills and the injections to work or if they work. I will feel like a man again. Yes, there are some horror stories out there but, as Old Guy mentioned there are thousands of men out there who are more than happy with their implants, and younger blokes such as yourself who are happy, they went down this path. I personally think the positives more than outweigh the negatives, but the decision to get an implant is only yours to make and what you want from life and what you feel comfortable with.
I wish you all the best mate, feel free to PM me if you want to chat and let us know how you went.

Thank you so much for your comment, and best of luck for your journey. Im surprised you’re doing a coloplast as I thought dr Malone only did AMS, did you ask for that specifically?

oldbeek wrote:Before finding FT, I talked to a friend of my nephew who had your exact problem. He was married at 24 and managed to have 2 children. His marriage was having problems created by his ED. To make a long story short, he said he wished he had done it at 20. He got his implant at 34.

Thank you for sharing its very comforting and reassuring to learn there have been others in my position out there, hope he’s doing well

Thank you so much for your comment, and best of luck for your journey. Im surprised you’re doing a coloplast as I thought dr Malone only did AMS, did you ask for that specifically?[/quote]

When I visited DR Malone for my appointment I asked does he use AMS or Coloplast, he said that he uses both. The reason why I asked him is that I am very thick in girth, more than the average bloke. Dr Malone said the Colosplast Titan would be best for me as the Titan has more girth than the AMS and the Titan has more rigidity than the AMS. I am going to have a bulge in my pants when flaccid more than the AMS due to the firmer cylinders of the Titan, but I guess that is a bonus as I have always been a grower, after the implant I am going to be show-er.

Geralt1305 wrote:hey all,

I’ve been lurking and reading posts on this forum for several months now but never posted or commented my story. I have never been able to get a full erection, and never been able to maintain a 70-80% erection for more than a few seconds since hitting puberty. I barely get morning wood, if I do it isn’t fully hard and lasts a few seconds. I never got random boners you’re supposed to get as a teenager. When I was a teenager I didn’t think much of it and thought maybe I jerked off too much or that it would work properly when I had sex but that was not the case. I didn’t know then but it’s apparent I was born with severe venous leakage. And I guess I was in denial.

I’m fit and healthy, I play sport and workout regularly, I’ve never smoked or done drugs, I’m not depressed (unless being miserable about this), no medical conditions or problems, and I’ve never had any injuries or sexual trauma. It took some convincing a urologist that my GP referred and he caved and got me a Doppler test where the injection did not give me an erection whatsoever.

The effect this has had on me all my life can’t be surmised in sentences. To be born essentially impotent has taken an extreme metal toll on me. It’s hard to not feel like a ‘man’ and to not feel worthless or inferior at times. It’s hard not be wrought with jealously and anger at every mention of sex, especially as a teenager/young adult.

As you can imagine I avoided sexual experiences for most of my life out of embarrassment and anxiousness - how can you make a girl understand a 20 year old has severe ED? I remained a virgin until after getting prescriptions for viagra and Cialis I decided to pay escorts between 2021-2022 to test the pills efficacy with the addition of a cock ring, to test if i could have sex.

To sum it up, even with the combination of a tight cock ring and 20mg Cialis I couldn’t. While 20mg cialis improves my erection and makes it last a little longer, it’s still not hard enough for proper sex, and only lasts several seconds. My dick would just not be hard enough to penetrate, it would shrink/deflate upon being pressed against the girl’s vagina, no matter how turned on I was. Sometimes it could be forced in and I could thrust for a little but this was not at a full erection. It was quite pathetic and after wasting thousands from several failed sessions I stopped and started the process of getting an implant.

After a consult with Dr Malone and go ahead to get the implant this year I’ve also put myself out there and started dating, and having ‘real’ sex. I have been seeing a girl for about a month that I really like, and we’ve had sex a few times. Outside the awkwardness of putting on a cock ring and the headaches/red face/runny nose cialis gives me I can actually somewhat have sex. I can do doggy (easiest when standing) and sometimes missionary but any other position just can’t get it in. While it is limiting I enjoy it and so does she. I also had a fwb a couple months ago where the sex was the same and she enjoyed it as well.

As aforementioned, I’ve been scheduled to get my implant by Dr Malone in brisbane, Australia. He was kind and empathetic to my situation, and is a very respected high volume surgeon, one of the best in the country. From what I’ve heard his other patients seem to be happy with him. I’m not worried about my choice of surgeon.

I guess I’m just getting increasingly more scared as the date grows closer. I struggle with my own thoughts, when I consulted with Dr Malone I was under the impression sex was a near impossibility and now that I’ve discovered I can have it, albeit limited, maybe I’ve misrepresented the situation to him. And could it be worth just having the limited sex I can have now instead of the complications and risks that may arise from the implant?

Being only 23, the amount of revisions I need will be way over what is generally needed, and the risk of infection. But is it worth accepting those risks in the face of no real other alternative? Is it better to focus on enjoying my sex life now in my youth at risk of comprising my future years peace, health and comfort ability? I guess I’m just looking for reassurance that I’m making the right choice, I’m terrified of removing the ability to get natural blood flow/erections for the rest of my life, even if mine are stunted. I’m afraid of the implant breaking, or it causing me discomfort or pain that eventually outweigh the pros of getting it. I thought it was expected to last 10 years but finding out it can be faulty much quicker is distressing. Im also worried about loss of length but from what I understand that is largely from men who lost erectile length due to not having erections for a period of time, with me getting erections this shouldn’t be a problem Im hoping.

But then I see all the positive stories and experiences that are posted on this forum and I am reminded of why I chose to get this done in the first place.

After learning all the info would you recommend I still go through with the implant at my age? Should I be content with the sex I can currently have? Is it worth getting just so the absolute misery and mental anguish and sexual frustration I’ve experienced all my life will disappear?

Thank you for reading, it was good to write everything down and I hope if any younger guys in my boat are reading they can feel heard, because I’ve always felt so alone with my struggle in this.

Hey man,

You’re definitely not alone. I’m also in my 20s and dealing with this. An implant is probably also in the cards for me in the not too distant future.

It is a very difficult decision to make. But it seems like you’re sure your current erections don’t cut it. It doesn’t seem like you have that much to lose. Good luck man.

Geralt1305 wrote:

oldbeek wrote:Before finding FT, I talked to a friend of my nephew who had your exact problem. He was married at 24 and managed to have 2 children. His marriage was having problems created by his ED. To make a long story short, he said he wished he had done it at 20. He got his implant at 34.

Thank you for sharing its very comforting and reassuring to learn there have been others in my position out there, hope he’s doing well

He actually started a podcast called "broken boner radio"(google it)"because he knew there were young guys like you out there looking for info. He was associated with Dr Goldstein sexual medicine in San Diego . His name is Danial Canfield You can find old copies of his program on you tube. I dont think he does the podcast anymore. I just listened to episode 503 on utube. It was discussion between him and his son who. also has the same problem. Hope this helps.