FrankTalk.org

bio: 30 years old, ED entire life, still a virgin cuz of it. pills/ved/injections didnt work. Finally did a doppler and revealed ive had a venous leak this whole time.

Im scheduled for my implant AMS 700 LGX next month and IM SO EXCITED!!!! I've fallen into heavy depression and avoided talking to people because of the severe ED. I finally see the light at the end of this fucking tunnel!

1) Is there any pre-op / post-op advice yall have?
For pre-op my doctor told me to use a VED daily before the surgery to stretch out my tissue so he can get a better fit.
For post-op from what ive read here, is rest/ice ur nuts haha
2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.
3) I live about 6 hours away from the urologist. Can I expect to drive back within a week or should I buy a train ticket or should I plan to stay there for 2-3 weeks??

johndoe365 wrote:bio: 30 years old, ED entire life, still a virgin cuz of it. pills/ved/injections didnt work. Finally did a doppler and revealed ive had a venous leak this whole time.

Im scheduled for my implant AMS 700 LGX next month and IM SO EXCITED!!!! I've fallen into heavy depression and avoided talking to people because of the severe ED. I finally see the light at the end of this fucking tunnel!

1) Is there any pre-op / post-op advice yall have?
For pre-op my doctor told me to use a VED daily before the surgery to stretch out my tissue so he can get a better fit.
For post-op from what ive read here, is rest/ice ur nuts haha
2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.
3) I live about 6 hours away from the urologist. Can I expect to drive back within a week or should I buy a train ticket or should I plan to stay there for 2-3 weeks??

I can attest to the advantage of pre-op VED use. If nothing else, it gives one something to think about while waiting for surgery. Twice a day, vacuum to erection for 30 seconds or so and release to flaccid and repeat that cycle for 30 minutes is what I recommend. Do not overdo it. Flushes blood through your penile tissues, maintains elasticity, MIGHT restore some lost size and MIGHT make it easier for the surgeon to insert the implant tubes and reportedly makes patient recovery a little easier.

Whether telling anyone what you are doing is wise is up to you and the nature of your relationships. The fact that you have remained silent until now (when your surgery is set) suggests keeping quiet. On the other hand, those close to you might feel kindly about being included in your circle of confidence, even at this late date. And once the surgery is done and eventually the "secret" is out, there might be a feeling of betrayal that the information was NOT shared earlier. It depends on the nature of your relationships.

One consideration about the secretive nature of the operation if you do choose not to tell. Staying away during your convalescence would make it easier to keep the secret. If you are laid up for a few days or couiple of weeks walking around tenderly might require explanation (or a lie).

I stayed away from work for three weeks because 1) I had the leave time and 2) I just felt like taking it easy. I could have returned to work half-days after one week easily. But (and this is a big but) stayng horizontal does reduce swelling and discomfort. So, stay in bed with your genitals as elevated as is comfortable will pay dividends the next day. I know of one FrankTalk member who felt so good he mowed his lawn soon after surgery. He felt the sore after-effects for several days afterwards.

Icing. Most recommend a bag of frozen green peas wrapped in a towel (the bag of peas can be shaped to conform to your shape and thetowel keeps you from getting frostbitten) or dried beans kept in the freezer. Multiple bags can be rotated in and out of the freezer. When I had shoulder surgery, I had an ice machine for this purpose. It is a cooler just about the size that would hold a picnic, but with a water pump and hoses in it. Put ice and water in the cooler and the pump circulates cooled water through the tubes and a bladder shaped like a shoulder (or a knee, or whatever body part needs to be cooled). A valve monitors the return water temperature and keeps a desired temperature constant. Ain't technology grand? Probably not worth the trouble for a convalescence of such a short time as implant surgery requires icing.

johndoe365 wrote:bio: 30 years old, ED entire life, still a virgin cuz of it. pills/ved/injections didnt work. Finally did a doppler and revealed ive had a venous leak this whole time.

Im scheduled for my implant AMS 700 LGX next month and IM SO EXCITED!!!! I've fallen into heavy depression and avoided talking to people because of the severe ED. I finally see the light at the end of this fucking tunnel!

1) Is there any pre-op / post-op advice yall have?
For pre-op my doctor told me to use a VED daily before the surgery to stretch out my tissue so he can get a better fit.
For post-op from what ive read here, is rest/ice ur nuts haha
2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.
3) I live about 6 hours away from the urologist. Can I expect to drive back within a week or should I buy a train ticket or should I plan to stay there for 2-3 weeks??

To tell or not to tell? Aside from the advice I posted a minute ago, there is my experience I will share with the forum.

I advertised my impotence. After decades of being so embarrassed about my slowly increasing erectile dysfunction (so much so that I hesitated a long time before revealing it to my primary care physician) I finally got oral medications for many years. Even before I revealed my ED to my doctor, I would warn potential sexual partners that "My penis does not work as well as I would like, but I will make every effort to ensure you are satisfied." And I followed through on the promise with fingers, tongue or toys as best I could. I had many years of successful relationships with that approach, but no marriages. So maybe that is not a 100% endorsement. Still it worked quite a while. When oral medications lost effectiveness, I started investigating more invasive remedies and settled on an implant.

When it became clear I would eventually get an implant, I advertised on a dating site of my functional impotence and my desire for a "lab partner" to accompany me on that journey. The ad stated that sex (the aforementioned "lab work"), both before and after implant would be involved. I got several volunteers, had sex with a few of those and finally found a lab partner with whom to experiment.

My point is that you CAN date without an erection. You CAN have sex (of sorts) without an erection. You CAN have a lover, no matter your erectile capacity.

My mantra is that women are incredibly supportive if they feel trusted, respected and safe. Even more if they feel loved. I got lots of congratulatory messages (even those who did not volunteer to participate in my lab work) about my courage in facing my difficulties with erections. Women apparently respect a man who does not hide from his difficulties, but confronts them head-on with a plan to overcome them. So, if you have a girlfriend (platonic, perhaps) you trust and with whom you could share your secret, you might find yourself pleasantly surprised by her support. Maybe even someone who would like to offer herself for a "test drive" after your recovery. Now THAT would be an ice cream sundae with a CHERRY on top! Eh?

johndoe365 wrote:bio: 30 years old, ED entire life, still a virgin cuz of it. pills/ved/injections didnt work. Finally did a doppler and revealed ive had a venous leak this whole time.

Im scheduled for my implant AMS 700 LGX next month and IM SO EXCITED!!!! I've fallen into heavy depression and avoided talking to people because of the severe ED. I finally see the light at the end of this fucking tunnel!

1) Is there any pre-op / post-op advice yall have?
For pre-op my doctor told me to use a VED daily before the surgery to stretch out my tissue so he can get a better fit.
For post-op from what ive read here, is rest/ice ur nuts haha
2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.
3) I live about 6 hours away from the urologist. Can I expect to drive back within a week or should I buy a train ticket or should I plan to stay there for 2-3 weeks??

2) Don’t tell anyone. It’s not anyone’s business but your own. I didn’t tell anyone and it worked out just fine. No one still knows to this day.
The only thing that sucks is lying to your friends and family, but again this is your personal business.

3) You could drive back the next day if you needed to. I drove 4 hours from Houston and just iced my dick while driving and popped ibuprofen.

Good luck brother. It will be all worth in the end

Franklin22 wrote:3) You could drive back the next day if you needed to. I drove 4 hours from Houston and just iced my dick while driving and popped ibuprofen.

Just don't hit any bumps or potholes and God forbid you need to do any emergency braking.

johndoe365 wrote:bio: 30 years old, ED entire life, still a virgin cuz of it. pills/ved/injections didnt work. Finally did a doppler and revealed ive had a venous leak this whole time.

Im scheduled for my implant AMS 700 LGX next month and IM SO EXCITED!!!! I've fallen into heavy depression and avoided talking to people because of the severe ED. I finally see the light at the end of this fucking tunnel!

1) Is there any pre-op / post-op advice yall have?
For pre-op my doctor told me to use a VED daily before the surgery to stretch out my tissue so he can get a better fit.
For post-op from what ive read here, is rest/ice ur nuts haha
2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.
3) I live about 6 hours away from the urologist. Can I expect to drive back within a week or should I buy a train ticket or should I plan to stay there for 2-3 weeks??

I will put in a bit of information. First get in the best shape you can. Exercise and watch your diet. Control any medical conditions you have the best you can. This will help you with recovery and aid in healing post op. Get a copy of the discharge instructions if you can. This will help you have everything you need after surgery before surgery. As you will be alone you should have everything you need ready to stay in bed for at least 48 hours. I was alone and had meals prepared and beverages ahead of time. I am a big fan of dry beans for ice packs. There is no moisture in the dry beans like there is in frozen veggies and they can clump up after you freeze them again for next time. Breaking up the clumps can cause breaks in the bag and result in leaks. I had an extra clean jock strap for after I took my first shower after surgery. My doctor was set on Motrin to reduce swelling and Bacitracin ointment for wound care of the incision. I do not do well on narcotic pain meds and just used the Motrin and Acetaminophen. We are all different so med choice will be up to you. I just used pain meds for the flight home and made the mistake of taking one before I left for the airport and another at a long layover. They finally started to work as I walked up to my front door. That was not a fun flight. That was 5 days after surgery and I was cleared to fly home 3 days after surgery. I think it was a bit more uncomfortable waiting the extra 2 days. Again we and our doctors are different. Driving can be a problem taking pain meds. State laws differ also but some may have laws against driving while taking pain meds. You might want to check. Ask you doctor when you will be cleared to drive. Ask about special soaps to wash with or prep before surgery. I used Hibicleans for my body with a lot of washing belly button to mid thigh. I had a 10 lb weight lifting restriction also. So you may need help loading your luggage. Reading material or computer games or binge watching will give you something to do. Ice packs and laying flat is important for the first 48 hours then you can start moving around more. The cold packs help reduce swelling but also slows down healing and you need to reduce and then stop that at some point. As far as VED use pre op there is a very good article in the general section in the documents worth reading thread called penis exercise that has some really good information on VED use. That is in the VED section. In the implant section there is a PDF pamphlet made up by a member of the site about implants and surgery. The members name is Tangerine and it has a lot of really good information in it and is worth the read as is the penis exercise documents that is below it in the VED section.

I had a friend that used the train a lot and he said the really nice chairs can be difficult to get at times. And then he had to use bench type not as comfortable ones. Train or flight would be my choice but I would check to make sure you could get one of the good seats on the train. Airports also have carts to transport people that need them and it was an option for me. Might check with the train people on that also. I would opt to use one of those and get back home as soon as possible. As we and our doctors are different the difficulty of recovery will vary. If you really want to drive I was making short driving trips around home when I came back. You could just wait until you no longer needed prescription pain meds and felt well enough to drive.

People heal differently. You don't know how yours will be. I hope it will be a smooth one. However, I am with the opinion to not drive for 6 hours only one week after surgery, even if you are making some stops every now and then. Instead, you can save on your hotel stay and take a flight home. You can do that at 3 days after your surgery, to be on the safe side. Some people do it sooner.

Glad you got things figured out. Life isn't good when things don't work like they should, especially at your age.
Pre-surgery the VED use is good advice. Buy several bags of frozen peas for icing afterwards. Get several days' worth of food, snacks, games, TV shows, etc. lined up. Might want to look into some underwear that is constrictive without being tight like a jock strap. Schedule at least 2 weeks of nothing.
Post-surgery the big thing will be resting the first few days and icing to reduce swelling and pain. Take any pain meds doc orders as needed, do not let the pain get out of control. Once you feel better around day 2 or 3 short walks will help.
As far as telling anyone my story was a cyst on a testicle that needed to be removed. That's enough of a cringe to most guys that they ask no more questions.
Best of luck as you go through this. It will change your life.

Ice, rest and baby socks for your glands are my top 3 recommendations. I went back to work 6 days post op without issue, if you dont have a desk job at least 2 weeks would have been needed.

I told most my friends about the surgery, i thought if any of them were going through the same issues my experience could help them some day. I also dont feel weird about getting it done, more the opposite , i could ware out multiple chicks in the same session, have better orgasms, outperform anyone with an oem dick. Cant think of any reason to be ashamed.

johndoe365 wrote:2) I'm planning on not telling anyone about this (friends or family) is this a wise idea? I'm close with my parents but I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally.

Old Guy wrote:As far as telling anyone my story was a cyst on a testicle that needed to be removed. That's enough of a cringe to most guys that they ask no more questions.

Except for maybe some guy, perhaps with a testicle issue himself and wondering if he just might have a cyst, starts asking for details. Of course, you could dismiss his questions by referring him to your urologist, but make sure your urologist actually does cystectomies.

There is no easy way to lie to one's friends and family. (Please do not take this as judgemental; I just feel it is hard to manage this tactic.)

Probably the best way to deal with it is what the OP (johndoe365) hinted at. "I feel like this sort of issue is something I need to deal with personally". If you can pull it off, just insist "I would rather not talk about it, please, so please respect my privacy."