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Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2023 12:45 am
by Shueswim
So…here’s my story in a nutshell. I was diagnosed with aggressive prostate cancer in 2016 and had a prostatectomy later that year. No natural erections since then. Vacuum, bimix, trimix all used with limited success for about three years and then I just gave up. It didn’t help that the cancer has returned twice since then necessitating radiation treatments and worst of all, androgen deprivation therapy - also known as chemical castration. The bad news was that I couldn’t have sex with my wife, the “good” news was that I really didn’t care because I had no testosterone and no libido. But, I know that my wife of 44 years, with whom I always had a great sex life up until 2016, did care. So I decided to finally do something about it.
Monday morning I’ll have the implant procedure with Dr Carrion in Tampa FL. I’ll admit to being a little nervous but this site has helped prepare me for what’s ahead. I am concerned that this is a lot to go through without the desire for sex and with unknown future as a stage 4 cancer patient. But the truth is none of us know our future - worst case it restores some intimacy to the marriage and brings joy to my wife.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2023 2:25 am
by ThailandBound
Welcome to the forum Sir.
Thank you for sharing your story. You’ve been through a lot and I wish you the best as you deal with your issues.
You are to be commended for your desire to get the implant out of concern for re-establishing intimacy with your wife. You are in good company here as many of us have had the implant and it has been a life changer. I am 10 1/2 months postop and it has been great.
Regarding your concerns about what sex will be like with low libido, all i can say is that you WILL indeed be able to have penetrative sex with your missus again. Don’t worry about that. Your implanted dick will be ready, even if you’re not.
I am reminded of a story the elderly father of my best friend told me. He was about 83 and hadn’t had sex with his wife due to ED for a long time. He was able to tolerate testosterone therapy which he said allowed him an erection. Not a strong erection. More of a chubby.
But, he said it was hard enough to penetrate her. He said the simple act of doing this, with a weak erection and only marginal libido was very worthwhile because he realized penetrating her was something that restored the unique intimacy only penetrative sex provides. He was unable to orgasm, but was delighted that she was enjoying sex, and him, again.
Perhaps your story will have some parallels. Each of us is on his own unique journey. I sincerely wish you the best on yours.
Please keep us posted and feel free to ask anything.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2023 8:14 am
by Old Guy
Welcome. You've been through a lot. Hope your future only gets better.
Yes, the implant is a big step. That is so wonderful that you are doing it for your wife. Best of luck, let us know how things go.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2023 10:08 pm
by HikerMan
Shueswim wrote:So…here’s my story in a nutshell. I was diagnosed with aggressive prostate cancer in 2016 and had a prostatectomy later that year. No natural erections since then. Vacuum, bimix, trimix all used with limited success for about three years and then I just gave up. It didn’t help that the cancer has returned twice since then necessitating radiation treatments and worst of all, androgen deprivation therapy - also known as chemical castration. The bad news was that I couldn’t have sex with my wife, the “good” news was that I really didn’t care because I had no testosterone and no libido. But, I know that my wife of 44 years, with whom I always had a great sex life up until 2016, did care. So I decided to finally do something about it.
Monday morning I’ll have the implant procedure with Dr Carrion in Tampa FL. I’ll admit to being a little nervous but this site has helped prepare me for what’s ahead. I am concerned that this is a lot to go through without the desire for sex and with unknown future as a stage 4 cancer patient. But the truth is none of us know our future - worst case it restores some intimacy to the marriage and brings joy to my wife.
I've walked in your shoes, brother.
It's something only us RP guys can relate to.
Looking back now, I realize it WAS the best possible move for me and my wife.
I went through a period of self doubt and depression when I realized my "little friend" wasn't going to cooperate anymore.
Now, almost at the one year mark I'm functioning at a level that is probably as good or better than I was in college.
One thing I would encourage you to do is cardio.
Not only will your "new" penis get quite a workout, so will your heart and lungs.
The wife and I get into some intense and lengthy sessions and I'm glad I've stayed in some degree of shape rolling into my 50's..
If you have any questions you can either ask me here or PM me.
Do NOT be afraid to ask
We're here for you.
Best to you on your journey.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2023 12:20 am
by Gt1956
I can't relate to your cancer but I'll give some info that might help you put some of this into perspective. Yes, testosterone does provide part of the desire side of the equation. But I've yet to read anyone say that testosterone is needed for the pleasure side of sex. Honestly, a good part of my enjoyment is that my wife is enjoying the sex.
My drs nurse related a story to me about an elderly man that they had implanted recently. She said he was in very good health & was getting married. Him & his bride both wanted at least some facet of an intimate life. Here is the key. She was in her late 90's & he was 101!
I think you'll be ok. It will take some time to get it all sorted out. Please don't get frustrated & give up. The end is worth the trip.
Best of luck to you.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2023 11:05 pm
by jwitten567
good luck my friend.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2023 7:25 am
by CuzznClark
Shueswim wrote:So…here’s my story in a nutshell. I was diagnosed with aggressive prostate cancer in 2016 and had a prostatectomy later that year. No natural erections since then. Vacuum, bimix, trimix all used with limited success for about three years and then I just gave up. It didn’t help that the cancer has returned twice since then necessitating radiation treatments and worst of all, androgen deprivation therapy - also known as chemical castration. The bad news was that I couldn’t have sex with my wife, the “good” news was that I really didn’t care because I had no testosterone and no libido. But, I know that my wife of 44 years, with whom I always had a great sex life up until 2016, did care. So I decided to finally do something about it.
Monday morning I’ll have the implant procedure with Dr Carrion in Tampa FL. I’ll admit to being a little nervous but this site has helped prepare me for what’s ahead. I am concerned that this is a lot to go through without the desire for sex and with unknown future as a stage 4 cancer patient. But the truth is none of us know our future - worst case it restores some intimacy to the marriage and brings joy to my wife.
@Shueswim I can relate to your story as I also had the radical RP 2 years ago, and have had a recent recurrence. Have recently finished 38 radiation treatments and have one more month of ADT. I truly understand and share the pain and ups/downs that go with PC. I have an appointment to go bionic in March of '24. Please keep us posted and wishing you only the best for the days and weeks ahead - Take Care!
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2023 12:22 pm
by Shueswim
[/quote]
I've walked in your shoes, brother.
It's something only us RP guys can relate to.
Looking back now, I realize it WAS the best possible move for me and my wife.
I went through a period of self doubt and depression when I realized my "little friend" wasn't going to cooperate anymore.
Now, almost at the one year mark I'm functioning at a level that is probably as good or better than I was in college.
One thing I would encourage you to do is cardio.
Not only will your "new" penis get quite a workout, so will your heart and lungs.
The wife and I get into some intense and lengthy sessions and I'm glad I've stayed in some degree of shape rolling into my 50's..
If you have any questions you can either ask me here or PM me.
Do NOT be afraid to ask
We're here for you.
Best to you on your journey.[/quote]
Thanks for the encouragement. Working out has been a passion of mine for 50 years. It's been more challenging in recent years with no testosterone but I manage to hold my own. Yesterday's surgery went well thankfully. I've been told no working out for a month. I haven't gone more than two weeks in 50 years and I am concerned that missing that much time in the absence of testosterone will cause atrophy that will be very difficult to reverse. I'll be very tempted to start some light workouts in two weeks...but I don't want to do anything that could cause problems with the implant.
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2023 12:42 pm
by Shueswim
Thanks to all for your encouragement and support. Surgery went very well. Pain is minimal and managed with tylenol. Of course it's uncomfortable, but I expected much worse. There was very little discussion presurgery with the doctor about what expect. My fault really, he was open to all questions...but frankly I didn't know what to ask. Most of what I knew came from this discussion board, so thanks again.
A couple questions as I enter the post surgery phase:
- I went in expecting a "chubby" and I certainly have one. What percentage of the implant fluid is in the implant at this phase of the process? I've seen some references to 60%, is that accurate?
- Once I go back for my follow up in a month I assume that's when the cycling begins and full capacity of the implant is reached in time. How long does that take and is that an uncomfortable process?
Re: Monday is the day I restore what prostate cancer took from me
Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2023 7:53 pm
by cth524
Shueswim let me know how it works out. I am planning for next year with him or Parker. Carrion is the leading one though