27M. Do I need an implant? Feeling defeated
Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2023 12:39 pm
Whats up guys. Recently stumbled upon this community because of my current issue. Made a throwaway account for anonymity. Im a 27M who has a venous leak and it's ruining my life. I've become very depressed and have suicidal thoughts quite often. The only thing stopping me is that I'm not a selfish person and I realize the traumatic impact that would have on my family. Not here to look for pity or sympathy but hoping at least one person in here has experience with a similar situation.
I was very sexually active since my teens and had many partners, never had an issue with erections. Then around 25 I had multiple tragic events happen in my life and felt like I needed help. I spoke to a psychiatrist who got me on anti depressants. Like most people I experienced some sexual sides and difficulty maintaining an erection. I quit the anti depressants and got prescribed viagra which led me down a slippery slope. I'm not sure if I actually needed the viagra at a certain point or if i developed a mental dependency.
Anyway, I took viagra way more than I should for around a year and then it no longer worked. I saw multiple urologists and no solution. I tried everything, daily cialis and viagra. Overtime my erection strength kept dropping 70% -> 50% -> 25% until I could no longer maintain an erection. My urologist was convinced it was mostly mental but after me swearing up and down he had me do a doppler exam. Then came probably the worst day of my life, the doctor confirming I had a venous leak and that I would need a penile implant at just age 26!
My gf of 2 years ended up cheating on me (I'm guessing for sexual satisfaction) and I truly can't blame her but still had to break up with her. BTW I'm located in a big city known for modeling (NYC/LA) and a few months after my breakup I met a famous european super model. We hit it off and started dating but I could never get the job done. I even tried trimix injections. I used to be in my bathroom injecting my dick with a needle as I had naked supermodel in my bed. It got so bad I even said "fuck it" and doubled and tripled the recommended dose for the trimix to only get a 25% erection and fail after a few minutes. I had to break things off with the supermodel on my own because I could not keep going through the failures. Funny enough she begged me not to break up with her and somehow was convinced that I was not attracted to her. So yeah as if this hasn't been enough of a mind fuck, I'm now beginning to SHRINK. I was never large to begin with but now my life has become a joke.
Originally 6"x4.5". Now I'm about half the size of that. I never measured my dick flaccid because I was always more of a grower but my flaccid dick is a joke now, like 2.5" and a pencil. This is making me extremely depressed and I don't know what to do.
Its gotten so bad that I finally gave in and considered going forward with the surgery but I can't find any reputable surgeons that take my insurance. All reputable surgeons are private or only take blue cross blue shield (which I don't have)
I'm very tight on money and going through some difficult financial times right now so I need to know where to best allocate my funds.
Questions.
I recently got laid off and lost my insurance through my employer
I'm located in NYC. Which "unemploment" health insurance should I apply for?
What should I do? Purchase a vacuum/bathmate type thing? Will PE help?
Has anyone here tried shockwave therapy for blood flow? PRP?
I don't want to lose anymore size before I find a surgeon so Id appreciate any insight you could provide as possible shockwave therapy, vacuums, or PE exercises
Much appreciated
I was very sexually active since my teens and had many partners, never had an issue with erections. Then around 25 I had multiple tragic events happen in my life and felt like I needed help. I spoke to a psychiatrist who got me on anti depressants. Like most people I experienced some sexual sides and difficulty maintaining an erection. I quit the anti depressants and got prescribed viagra which led me down a slippery slope. I'm not sure if I actually needed the viagra at a certain point or if i developed a mental dependency.
Anyway, I took viagra way more than I should for around a year and then it no longer worked. I saw multiple urologists and no solution. I tried everything, daily cialis and viagra. Overtime my erection strength kept dropping 70% -> 50% -> 25% until I could no longer maintain an erection. My urologist was convinced it was mostly mental but after me swearing up and down he had me do a doppler exam. Then came probably the worst day of my life, the doctor confirming I had a venous leak and that I would need a penile implant at just age 26!
My gf of 2 years ended up cheating on me (I'm guessing for sexual satisfaction) and I truly can't blame her but still had to break up with her. BTW I'm located in a big city known for modeling (NYC/LA) and a few months after my breakup I met a famous european super model. We hit it off and started dating but I could never get the job done. I even tried trimix injections. I used to be in my bathroom injecting my dick with a needle as I had naked supermodel in my bed. It got so bad I even said "fuck it" and doubled and tripled the recommended dose for the trimix to only get a 25% erection and fail after a few minutes. I had to break things off with the supermodel on my own because I could not keep going through the failures. Funny enough she begged me not to break up with her and somehow was convinced that I was not attracted to her. So yeah as if this hasn't been enough of a mind fuck, I'm now beginning to SHRINK. I was never large to begin with but now my life has become a joke.
Originally 6"x4.5". Now I'm about half the size of that. I never measured my dick flaccid because I was always more of a grower but my flaccid dick is a joke now, like 2.5" and a pencil. This is making me extremely depressed and I don't know what to do.
Its gotten so bad that I finally gave in and considered going forward with the surgery but I can't find any reputable surgeons that take my insurance. All reputable surgeons are private or only take blue cross blue shield (which I don't have)
I'm very tight on money and going through some difficult financial times right now so I need to know where to best allocate my funds.
Questions.
I recently got laid off and lost my insurance through my employer
I'm located in NYC. Which "unemploment" health insurance should I apply for?
What should I do? Purchase a vacuum/bathmate type thing? Will PE help?
Has anyone here tried shockwave therapy for blood flow? PRP?
I don't want to lose anymore size before I find a surgeon so Id appreciate any insight you could provide as possible shockwave therapy, vacuums, or PE exercises
Much appreciated