My uro said I can't get an implant until my fiance comes into the office.. is this right??

[macoza]

Hi guys..I'm thinking of getting an implant. But something is stopping me from getting one. My uro said that during sex, a woman can tell if I have an implant. But I've read that most women can't tell at all. My uro said that in order for me to get an implant that I'd have to bring in my fiance to the office to tell her. Is this right?

[Wooody]

That's ridiculous. An implant is for yourself, not anyone else. And so what if she was could tell (mine can't)? That shouldn't be any of your Dr's business. If your Dr doesn't drop this requirement, I'd find another Dr!

[ElbowRoom]

Your medical conditions are confidential, and doctors cannot legally disclose or force disclosure to third parties without your consent.

Run far from this urologist, and report them to the state medical board. This is borderline malpractice.

[LetoMan]

Before we all jump to reporting this doc to the medical board:

I think it’s reasonable for a doc to say that if a man is in a committed relationship, their partner should be part of the discussions. Why? Because that is the best way to make sure that it is a good outcome for the patient. If macoza is having sex with his fiancée, she is absolutely going to know something is different after he gets implanted. It’s not good for him, her, anyone to spring this on her as a surprise. He’s not saying that her consent is required or that she will be informed if he goes ahead with it, he’s saying that the best course of treatment is for both parties in the relationship to understand what is going on and what the implications are prior to getting implanted.

It’s not medical malpractice to say that the course of treatment involves discussion with the partner. If he refuses to bring her in, that’s fine, but the doc using their judgement might refuse to implant as a result if they see that as a red flag for a positive outcome. Whether the doc can do that or not is a technical question in the jurisdiction where the doc is located, but generally speaking docs are not obligated to provide elective treatments particularly if they feel that has the potential to affect the patient in negative ways.

Macoza, if your fiancée has had sex with you previously, it is virtually impossible that she won’t notice afterwards that something has changed dramatically. That is different than the idea that women who have sex with a man for the first time after implantation will largely just assume he is just super hard all the time. That may be the source of your confusion.

My advice is that you discuss implantation with your fiancée and help her get comfortable with the issue, including discussion with the doc.

Be well,
Leto

[Gt1956]

My dr didn't even visually see my wife until the day of sugery. I think he introduced himself & said hi.

[LetoMan]

GT, if your doc is like most, he probably asked you about your relationship. If you said something like “my wife and I discussed it and she is on board, we’ve been married 30 years”, maybe the doc leaves it at that. I don’t know what the OP said to his doc, but if he said “I haven’t told my fiancée and I wasn’t planning on it because I read on FrankTalk that she won’t be able to tell” the doc is probably gonna take a different approach.

[HikerMan]

Dude...I would be finding a new surgeon Immediately.

I fired the first guy they gave me and never looked back.
The person you choose to have this procedure with HAS to be world class and well reviewed.

And from what you are telling me-I don't think he's either.
Buyer Beware.

Proceed with extreme caution.
My Doctor told me horror stories of some of the revisions he 's had to deal with
from sub-par surgeons.

Best of luck.

[ready2go]

Hi guys..I'm thinking of getting an implant. But something is stopping me from getting one. My uro said that during sex, a woman can tell if I have an implant. But I've read that most women can't tell at all. My uro said that in order for me to get an implant that I'd have to bring in my fiance to the office to tell her. Is this right?

What the hell ? Where does he get off telling you how to conduct your personal life ?
that is way out of line . Who you tell of if you tell anyone is none of anyone's business but your own .
I would call him out on that and or find another doctor .
I myself have a malleable and have told no one. Including my wife .when she left for a year, i found other sex partners and again now when she once more left for 6 months . ..and will not tell any sex partners. my only concern for them is that i satisfy them sexually . they have zero need to know i have an implant .
thats my choice ,other guys do share they have an implant . The decision to or not to share you have an implant ,is up to the person with the implant .
That dork has some nerve . He sounds like a pussy whipped feminist simp .

[UpNorth]

Another Stressor to deal with.

My doctor wanted my wife to come in but wasn’t necessary. I live 400 miles away with no one else to care for my puppies, so that wasn’t happening. Besides that NYC traffic would have given her a heart attack.

[GoodWood]

I will add my name to the chorus.

This is a good opportunity to reevaluate your choice in surgeon. I would switch.

Does your fiancé WANT to come in? I’m assuming she is aware and supportive. If she isn’t, take a moment to reevaluate that choice as well.

Go to the best high volume surgeon you can reach.