Will an Implant Increase Libido?
Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2015 12:20 pm
I wrote a blog sometime after my prostate surgery to help me understand why my desire for sex disappeared. The odd thing was this happened when I received the diagnosis, NOT after surgery. I've had my T levels checked and nothing is wrong. My interest in sex dropped from a 10 to a 0 and hasn't returned. These are issues men face after prostate surgery and do effect desire:
1. Coping with cancer-the emotions of fear and/or anxiety can impact sexual desire.
2. Depression- men often experience post-surgical depression. When men are depressed they don't typically experience depression the same way women do. Women typically become sad. Depressed men are frequently agitated, irritable, and easily angered. They could experience a loss energy and interest in previously enjoyed hobbies and activities. Depression often leads to a noticeable reduction in desire and/or interest in sex.
3. Losing urinary control- After prostate surgery the majority of men lose the ability to control urination. This lack of control may great impact a man's desire for sex.
4.Climacturia is a medical term describing orgasm-associated incontinence. Few if any men are told it's very possible they will leak and or urinate during their orgasm. For some men and/or women, urinating during an orgasm is either highly embarrassing or a complete sexual turn off, so the couple may avoid sex due to the appearance of climacturia. (I still have this to a very small degree)
5. The Loss of Ejaculation- After surgery men lose their ability to ejaculate. This can affect the pleasure men feel. Some men will avoid experiencing orgasms because of the sense of loss or sadness they feel after an ejaculation free orgasm.
6. A change in the quality or intensity or painful orgasms-For some men there is a significantly reduced intensity of their orgasms so there is a reduction in pleasure. This could serve as a turn off. Some men will experience painful orgasms after surgery, and there is a built in desire to avoid pain.
7. A reduction in penis size-Some men report a noticeable reduction in the size of their penis. This may cause some degree of shame-which will greatly impact a man's interest in sex.
8. Erectile Dysfunction-The majority of men will experience the loss of their ability to experience an erection for a minimum of 18-24 months. The inability to experience an erection can have a devastating impact on a man's libido and desire for all forms of physical contact.
I don't know why I haven't read this any where else but this seems obvious to me that prior to surgery each man had a number of triggers which could result in an erection. Some of those triggers for an erection were:
1. Sight-Men often get arouse as a result of seeing something that turns them on.
2. Sound- Certain sounds or sex talk can arouse men. There is a whole industry based on the power of sex talk to arouse men
3. Smells- Certain smells can arouse a man to experience an erection
4. Fantasy- Men have the capacity to use their imagination to think about sexual experiences that arouse them, resulting in erection.
5. Words-Some men are aroused by reading about sexual encounters.
6. Touch- Certain forms of touching can create a state of arousal.
After surgery, most men will experience a complete and total loss of sexually exciting, erection inducing triggers. For men, their erection is the signal they are sexually aroused. Unfortunately, for a majority of men, prostate surgery results in the inability to experience an erection when exposed to previous erection inducing triggers. Men experience their flaccid penis as evidence they are no longer aroused and then go one to conclude surgery forever ended their interest in sex.
When men lose their every trigger they had which produced an erection, there a a powerful emotional reaction this this loss. Now these previously exciting triggers result in a man feeling a sense of loss, disappointment, frustration, anger and shame. Many men coping with erectile dysfunction feel that surgery robbed them of their manhood
In my opinion, the complete and total loss of sexual exciting triggers is what men experience as a loss in libido. Most men associate a flaccid penis as a lack of excitement and/or interest in sex. So it's easy for a man to conclude that as a result of surgery he's lost his interest in sex.
The couple discover much of their sexual history is lost to both of them. Behaviors that previously resulted in mutual excitement and pleasure now end with failure, disappointment and frustration. It takes a compete re-wiring of the brain for a man to learn he can be sexually aroused with a flaccid penis. Most men have no idea it's even possible to experience an orgasm with a flaccid penis.
To re-claim your sexuality post-surgery takes time, effort, experimentation, and new experiences to re-program your mind and body to experience arousal in completely different ways than you did prior to surgery. Men must learn how to find pleasure, enjoyment, and orgasms with a flaccid penis, This isn't a simple or easy lesson for a man to learn but it's an essential lesson to learn in order to re-claim and renew sexuality post-surgery.
I've done what I can. My wife and I are successfully able to enjoy sex a lot! That said my desire still remains at zero. I'm hoping the ability to have intercourse with my wife will raise my desire and libido.
Has anyone found the implant to increase their desire for sex?
1. Coping with cancer-the emotions of fear and/or anxiety can impact sexual desire.
2. Depression- men often experience post-surgical depression. When men are depressed they don't typically experience depression the same way women do. Women typically become sad. Depressed men are frequently agitated, irritable, and easily angered. They could experience a loss energy and interest in previously enjoyed hobbies and activities. Depression often leads to a noticeable reduction in desire and/or interest in sex.
3. Losing urinary control- After prostate surgery the majority of men lose the ability to control urination. This lack of control may great impact a man's desire for sex.
4.Climacturia is a medical term describing orgasm-associated incontinence. Few if any men are told it's very possible they will leak and or urinate during their orgasm. For some men and/or women, urinating during an orgasm is either highly embarrassing or a complete sexual turn off, so the couple may avoid sex due to the appearance of climacturia. (I still have this to a very small degree)
5. The Loss of Ejaculation- After surgery men lose their ability to ejaculate. This can affect the pleasure men feel. Some men will avoid experiencing orgasms because of the sense of loss or sadness they feel after an ejaculation free orgasm.
6. A change in the quality or intensity or painful orgasms-For some men there is a significantly reduced intensity of their orgasms so there is a reduction in pleasure. This could serve as a turn off. Some men will experience painful orgasms after surgery, and there is a built in desire to avoid pain.
7. A reduction in penis size-Some men report a noticeable reduction in the size of their penis. This may cause some degree of shame-which will greatly impact a man's interest in sex.
8. Erectile Dysfunction-The majority of men will experience the loss of their ability to experience an erection for a minimum of 18-24 months. The inability to experience an erection can have a devastating impact on a man's libido and desire for all forms of physical contact.
I don't know why I haven't read this any where else but this seems obvious to me that prior to surgery each man had a number of triggers which could result in an erection. Some of those triggers for an erection were:
1. Sight-Men often get arouse as a result of seeing something that turns them on.
2. Sound- Certain sounds or sex talk can arouse men. There is a whole industry based on the power of sex talk to arouse men
3. Smells- Certain smells can arouse a man to experience an erection
4. Fantasy- Men have the capacity to use their imagination to think about sexual experiences that arouse them, resulting in erection.
5. Words-Some men are aroused by reading about sexual encounters.
6. Touch- Certain forms of touching can create a state of arousal.
After surgery, most men will experience a complete and total loss of sexually exciting, erection inducing triggers. For men, their erection is the signal they are sexually aroused. Unfortunately, for a majority of men, prostate surgery results in the inability to experience an erection when exposed to previous erection inducing triggers. Men experience their flaccid penis as evidence they are no longer aroused and then go one to conclude surgery forever ended their interest in sex.
When men lose their every trigger they had which produced an erection, there a a powerful emotional reaction this this loss. Now these previously exciting triggers result in a man feeling a sense of loss, disappointment, frustration, anger and shame. Many men coping with erectile dysfunction feel that surgery robbed them of their manhood
In my opinion, the complete and total loss of sexual exciting triggers is what men experience as a loss in libido. Most men associate a flaccid penis as a lack of excitement and/or interest in sex. So it's easy for a man to conclude that as a result of surgery he's lost his interest in sex.
The couple discover much of their sexual history is lost to both of them. Behaviors that previously resulted in mutual excitement and pleasure now end with failure, disappointment and frustration. It takes a compete re-wiring of the brain for a man to learn he can be sexually aroused with a flaccid penis. Most men have no idea it's even possible to experience an orgasm with a flaccid penis.
To re-claim your sexuality post-surgery takes time, effort, experimentation, and new experiences to re-program your mind and body to experience arousal in completely different ways than you did prior to surgery. Men must learn how to find pleasure, enjoyment, and orgasms with a flaccid penis, This isn't a simple or easy lesson for a man to learn but it's an essential lesson to learn in order to re-claim and renew sexuality post-surgery.
I've done what I can. My wife and I are successfully able to enjoy sex a lot! That said my desire still remains at zero. I'm hoping the ability to have intercourse with my wife will raise my desire and libido.
Has anyone found the implant to increase their desire for sex?
