FrankTalk.org

Please help me stop our beloved Frank Talk from being a bully pulpit. Frank Talk is an awesome site where men struggling with ED can share and support one another. Please do not post anything critical of another Frank Talk member. Never question their truthfulness or accuse them of lying. What a Frank Talk member says in their post is none of your business so mind your own unless it's about you. No one wants to hear your critical comment and it shows all who read it just how 'small' (pun intended) you really are. One would think mature men wouldn't act so childish, sadly this is not the case. Please join me in your commitment to keep our Frank Talk bully free. If you feel you must give advice or correction, do it in a private message.
You guys are awesome.
Donnie
To those who can't wait to point out this should be in General Discussion. It is most appropriate in implants.

ddbryan1972 wrote:Please help me stop our beloved Frank Talk from being a bully pulpit. Frank Talk is an awesome site where men struggling with ED can share and support one another. Please do not post anything critical of another Frank Talk member. Never question their truthfulness or accuse them of lying. What a Frank Talk member says in their post is none of your business so mind your own unless it's about you. No one wants to hear your critical comment and it shows all who read it just how 'small' (pun intended) you really are. One would think mature men wouldn't act so childish, sadly this is not the case. Please join me in your commitment to keep our Frank Talk bully free. If you feel you must give advice or correction, do it in a private message.
You guys are awesome.
Donnie
To those who can't wait to point out this should be in General Discussion. It is most appropriate in implants.

Well said Donnie. It takes a lot of guts to come on here and talk about your most private ordeal. To look for support and get called a liar or talked cruelly too is inexcusable. Don't be a dick... no pun intended.
Larry

Larry10625 wrote:To look for support and get called a liar or talked cruelly too is inexcusable. Don't be a dick... no pun intended.Larry

So true, so true.

As a new member for two months and scheduled for an implant in a month I certainly don't need to read these attacks on other members especially on a member who try's and help. All I can say is what you wrote in this post was well done.

I need to disagree with some of this. If a FT member posts something that you believe is wrong, and that you think may harm other people, then I believe you should say something. Therefore, there is reason for being critical and for at least questioning the information presented. And why not publicly correct somebody if you think you are helping people see truth in something, or at least another side of a discussion. I think 'arguing', or presenting opposing information, can be done publicly without being antagonistic? Isnt that one of the main points of a forum? Does being critical, or at least presenting a counter argument, make someone small?

However, that doesn't give reason for personally attacking someone. And without evidence of it, blindly accussing someone of lying is very damaging. You can respectfully disagree with someone without attacking or belittling the person.

Constructive criticism - good

Destructive criticism - bad

I think

This thread wasn't written because someone 'corrected' or enlightened another member. This was written because phrases such as, 'What are you smoking? 'Who cares what you think?'You are lying.'as many other cutting cruel remarks , have been spoken recently by Frank Talk brothers to Frank Talk brothers. I have been a victim of such verbal abuse as well as others. This behavior should not be condoned by our members and I ask others to consider their words carefully. Damage can be done by a bully pulpit. Please do not encourage or acknowledge such rude and cruel behavior.
Donnie

Cnidium wrote:I need to disagree with some of this. If a FT member posts something that you believe is wrong, and that you think may harm other people, then I believe you should say something. Therefore, there is reason for being critical and for at least questioning the information presented. And why not publicly correct somebody if you think you are helping people see truth in something, or at least another side of a discussion. I think 'arguing', or presenting opposing information, can be done publicly without being antagonistic? Isnt that one of the main points of a forum? Does being critical, or at least presenting a counter argument, make someone small?

However, that doesn't give reason for personally attacking someone. And without evidence of it, blindly accussing someone of lying is very damaging. You can respectfully disagree with someone without attacking or belittling the person.

I for one none did not think Donnie ever said anything that would harm me. Maybe I missed something.

sliphill,

That is correct, I have never seen Donnie say anything that could be interpreted as an attack against someone.

If you have made it to the implant board, then, by definition, you have a pretty serious problem that disserves supportive comments from the frank-talk brothers....so yes I agree that we need to be more tolerant of each other's viewpoints; and, yes, we do need to give each other some space.

That being said, it is certainly important to correct each other when someone gets the facts wrong, because the mission statement of franktalk (as written on their banner) is:

“To educate men about erectile dysfunction and help them find treatment or cure through education, support, advocacy, and research.”

The key, is to correct each other in a respectful and objective fashion. If someone makes an odd claim, then it is fine to cite some scientific research which refutes that claim. We should, obviously, refrain from attacking the person, instead, we should keep our thoughts and rigor focused on the concepts, the theories, and the direct experiences of implants .