finally talk to my girlfriend about this a bit

[jackhammerdreamz]

tl;dr my gf thinks my dick should work "fine", but she doesn't know how "all that works..." I'm going to see a urologist who does implants(recommended on this site) Nov 2nd to get his thoughts/run tests...

It's been an ongoing elephant in the room.
I would have to take a pill (more often than she knows) and then try to perform long enough to satisfy her.
The last year it has been difficult to rise to and finish the task.(we've been together 3 years)
She has noticed this along with my penchant for skipping foreplay the moment I get an erection which leads to not satisfying her enough.
Gotta prime the pump before going for it as they say....

We last had sex 3 weeks ago and she didn't cum. She probably hasn't had an orgasm for the whole year....
So I popped a 100mg fildena before she got home last night.
We went to bed early and I spoon her. I got aroused and started rubbing her between the thighs. After a few minutes I slid down her panties to rub her clit a few more minutes.
I maintained an erection and slide it in, the angle has always been one that makes me cum far too fast.
I stayed hard afterwards thanks to the pill I took so she asked if I took a pill. I said I did.

I told her I wish I could fuck her more often, I love fucking her.
She says well why don't you?
I said well I'm not confident enough. My physical tools don't match my levels of wanting.
We have discussed this before and I went to a urologist recommended by my GP.
They ran the standard 2 or 3 tests and my testosterone came back within the appropriate range. So my drive should be normal for my age(33).
This urologist prescribed cialis which helped little(not much), but my insurance changed and I didn't bother to get a prior auth.
Currently I get generic viagra and cialis through the internet(ya probably not as strong)...

I told her that the pills don't always work well enough.
She said well when you can get hard you get a strong boner.(she doesn't know I take one every day in the off chance we have sex)
I said well if it's not hard at the right time what good is the boner???
Along with that, if I'm distracted or anything changes during sex I quickly lose it even with a pill.

I have an appointment with a urologist who performs implants and I had told her about this visit a month or so ago.
Last night I said, "You know if pills stop working there are only 3 more options; shots, pumps and an implant.
She said, "You don't need an implant, why would you think that?"
I told her, "Because I want to be able to fuck you no questions asked. Anywhere, any time."
She reiterated, "Your dick is fine babe, you can get good boners.... but I don't know how all that works..."
I shrugged and said, "Well from this last year we know that it's not always a great boner. I avoid sex or we only have sex once every 2-3 weeks or I go soft mid sex or get soft while pleasuring her when I am mentally aroused but not physically..... This isn't because I lack desire but more I lack a unit I can rely on.... sidenote: The signals between testes and brain work fine too according to previous mentioned tests at urologist"

I left it at saying that she doesn't know if I have any physical problems and I don't know either. (She agreed)
So Nov 2nd, I'm going into my appointment with an open mind and curiosity. I hope there is nothing dangerously wrong (cancer etc) and if there are any physical limitations I think she'll be on board with an implant.

Funny enough she said her grandfather had an implant.
He suffered a spinal cord injury so he had one so he could still "pleasure the ladies"

Honestly, I have read so much about this stuff, I dream about an implant so I can be done thinking about it!
Pills are a guessing game with side-effects(my tinnitus is worse than ever), shots are delaying the inevitable not to mention leave side-effects, the pump is just an accident waiting to happen and could leave awful damage....
My threshold for pain is up there. I had a vasectomy at 31 and know that surgeons are not particular kind to the testicals when they are working in that area. I've played soccer lol so getting hit in the junk by a 30mph soccer ball is probably the closest I can get to the pain of this procedure....I have the vacation time and have learned enough on the board that early inflation is key to keeping size, and how important it is to rest a lot. Being relatively young I imagine my recovery would be around 2 weeks.....
We'll see what the doc thinks, his word is what I'll go off of.

Sorry got a bit ranty and rambly there....
I am like a lot of you, I just want to have a reliable unit and I want to bang the night away. Even after I cum I want to finish her off!

[geophd]

Jack,

You have an interesting story. Maybe I missed it but have you ever had an ultrasound to check your blood flow. You should have had that done years ago! If you haven't then I'm sure your new doctor will do that. If you have, then it seems it came back with normal blood flow? No venous leak? If you have venous leak and it's fucking with your ability to have the sex life you want, even with pills then IMHO you are not off base strongly considering an implant. In fact, I'm surprised you didn't get more serious about this years ago. If you don't have venous leak, well you're still in a shitty situation because you have erection issues but your doctor will be confused and probably thinks it's psychogenic. That could be a problem for his/her recommendation of an implant and insurance coverage... I don't know of course.

I'm in a similar situation, albeit for a shorter period of time. My ED started 6 months ago and I can get erections using 10 mg cialis daily, sometimes it gives me headaches. Do you get headaches?! How have you dealt with them for 3 years?! My ED is caused by my peyronie's disease, an injury to the penis that causes fibrosis. Doctors say the ED will probably go away but I'm not buying it. Instead I'm looking into alternatives to taking cialis everyday. The headaches and the pills make me feel insecure about sex and make it less enjoyable. The activity is a stressor and it shouldn't be. The implant community seems to have a high opinion of implants so it seems like a promising solution. You've been dealing with this issue much longer than me but yours also sounds like more severe ED, 100 mg viagra is a big dose to not work. If I took 100 mg my dick would explode and so would my head with headaches. I told my girlfriend a few months ago that I would take the pills and wait for the ED to get better, we haven't really talked about it since. She doesn't know I take a pill everyday to have sex with her, or that the pills give me headaches. I plan to wait another 3-6 months for ED to improve and if not I'm probably going to pull the trigger. I don't think it's unreasonable for you to explain to your girlfriend that you don't want to have to take pills for the rest of your life. I also would say no way to using a pump and injections, very few people are satisfied with those and I can't imagine being excited about my sex life having to use them everyday or time. You know your ED best and after all the years you've had it there probably is no magic bullet other than an implant. I would go to the doctor having already decided if an implant is what you want. But that's just me. Good luck to you! I'll be following your story. Search out the best implant surgeon you can find. Eid, Kramer etc...

[jackhammerdreamz]

Jack,

You have an interesting story. Maybe I missed it but have you ever had an ultrasound to check your blood flow. You should have had that done years ago! If you haven't then I'm sure your new doctor will do that. If you have, then it seems it came back with normal blood flow? No venous leak? If you have venous leak and it's fucking with your ability to have the sex life you want, even with pills then IMHO you are not off base strongly considering an implant. In fact, I'm surprised you didn't get more serious about this years ago. If you don't have venous leak, well you're still in a shitty situation because you have erection issues but your doctor will be confused and probably thinks it's psychogenic. That could be a problem for his/her recommendation of an implant and insurance coverage... I don't know of course.

I'm in a similar situation, albeit for a shorter period of time. My ED started 6 months ago and I can get erections using 10 mg cialis daily, sometimes it gives me headaches. Do you get headaches?! How have you dealt with them for 3 years?! My ED is caused by my peyronie's disease, an injury to the penis that causes fibrosis. Doctors say the ED will probably go away but I'm not buying it. Instead I'm looking into alternatives to taking cialis everyday. The headaches and the pills make me feel insecure about sex and make it less enjoyable. The activity is a stressor and it shouldn't be. The implant community seems to have a high opinion of implants so it seems like a promising solution. You've been dealing with this issue much longer than me but yours also sounds like more severe ED, 100 mg viagra is a big dose to not work. If I took 100 mg my dick would explode and so would my head with headaches. I told my girlfriend a few months ago that I would take the pills and wait for the ED to get better, we haven't really talked about it since. She doesn't know I take a pill everyday to have sex with her, or that the pills give me headaches. I plan to wait another 3-6 months for ED to improve and if not I'm probably going to pull the trigger. I don't think it's unreasonable for you to explain to your girlfriend that you don't want to have to take pills for the rest of your life. I also would say no way to using a pump and injections, very few people are satisfied with those and I can't imagine being excited about my sex life having to use them everyday or time. You know your ED best and after all the years you've had it there probably is no magic bullet other than an implant. I would go to the doctor having already decided if an implant is what you want. But that's just me. Good luck to you! I'll be following your story. Search out the best implant surgeon you can find. Eid, Kramer etc...

I definitely get headaches, along with nausea, and temporary loss of hearing. It sucks!
Oh it's been longer than 3 years even. I've been using ed meds off and on since my early 20s

I have NOT had any ultrasound blood flow tests done. That will definitely be something I will be asking for if the doc doesn't already schedule one.
lol @ explode... yes it's a high dosage.

Agreed not being excited and being stressed is a major issue. There's nothing worse than not being able to enjoy the excitement and pleasure of sex!

I imagine the doctor and I will have a very in depth discussion regarding the results and what if anything he can recommend.
Doctors that specialize in implants can also speak best to the insurance company if they are dependent on certain requirements.

The implants do sound great but they're not without their caveats. hturner12 has a post about his thoughts post-op... It's a painful process to say the least. It's also a little disheartening knowing that you will never again have a natural erection or get even semi-erect from arousal(although people say they can still get engorged)... The idea of being able to be ready for sex in minutes no matter what, outweigh the negatives for me though.

Keep us posted on your journey through this! It's great to find a place to talk about these sensitive and frankly embarrassing problems we have. But we're not alone!

[Bandit]

Jack
Let me just say that getting an implant for me wasnt even a question. Natural erections stopped with prostate surgery. Pills never worked. Gels burned. And needles in your dick. Really. Yeah but i tried them too and didnt like the feeling plus all the fixes are mood breakers. So do your research and make sure this is the right decision for YOU. Not her. Plus, if she doesnt understand "how that all works", put her on FT. She will get an education but quick. She will understand before long that ED is a real problem. It validates the problems many men have with erections and lack there of. It also will help with what the options are as well as the results. There is much to learn here for you both. And the men here are knowledgable, caring and sharing. Hope this helps. Wish you well.
Bandit

[Dustyknox]

My situation was almost identical to yours. I’m only a couple years older too. Feel free to read my story. Anyway, PDE5 inhibitors stopped working, and I didn’t see injections or vacuums as a realistic option either. That’s why I decided to get the implant. It’s wonderful you have a girlfriend that is so supportive. I hope you find peace soon.

[jackhammerdreamz]

Thanks dusty and bandit!

I may turn her to the site but I'd probably remove a few of my posts in the event she put 2 and 2 together. I'm not as frank with the wording when I discuss this with her.

Thanks again for all the support for me and so many others!

[geophd]

Jack,
I'm on the fence about introducing my girlfriend to this website, there's all kinds of stuff on here that might be weird to a young woman that doesn't have a dick or ED! We're all empathetic because we're here for a reason but this forum is not for the faint of heart, dick surgery recovery pictures and all . My thought when it gets closer for me is to have the consultation with the surgeon, decide for myself what I want, then invite her to a follow up appointment with the surgeon where she can be there for a discussion. Maybe throw in some stories from this forum but not really expose it to her, but maybe I'm just self conscious of letting her know just how much this has affected me inside as I'm keeping a strong front right now and probably would through any potential surgery. Keep us updated on how it goes making the decision and exposing your girlfriend to the thought and logic behind your decision! If she loves you and the surgery goes as well as it seems to go for others then I'm sure it will all workout. Maybe young guys with girlfriends will chime in with how this process went for them, the girlfriend aspect that is.

[Larry10625]

tl;dr my gf thinks my dick should work "fine", but she doesn't know how "all that works..." I'm going to see a urologist who does implants(recommended on this site) Nov 2nd to get his thoughts/run tests...

It's been an ongoing elephant in the room.
I would have to take a pill (more often than she knows) and then try to perform long enough to satisfy her.
The last year it has been difficult to rise to and finish the task.(we've been together 3 years)
She has noticed this along with my penchant for skipping foreplay the moment I get an erection which leads to not satisfying her enough.
Gotta prime the pump before going for it as they say....

We last had sex 3 weeks ago and she didn't cum. She probably hasn't had an orgasm for the whole year....
So I popped a 100mg fildena before she got home last night.
We went to bed early and I spoon her. I got aroused and started rubbing her between the thighs. After a few minutes I slid down her panties to rub her clit a few more minutes.
I maintained an erection and slide it in, the angle has always been one that makes me cum far too fast.
I stayed hard afterwards thanks to the pill I took so she asked if I took a pill. I said I did.

I told her I wish I could fuck her more often, I love fucking her.
She says well why don't you?
I said well I'm not confident enough. My physical tools don't match my levels of wanting.
We have discussed this before and I went to a urologist recommended by my GP.
They ran the standard 2 or 3 tests and my testosterone came back within the appropriate range. So my drive should be normal for my age(33).
This urologist prescribed cialis which helped little(not much), but my insurance changed and I didn't bother to get a prior auth.
Currently I get generic viagra and cialis through the internet(ya probably not as strong)...

I told her that the pills don't always work well enough.
She said well when you can get hard you get a strong boner.(she doesn't know I take one every day in the off chance we have sex)
I said well if it's not hard at the right time what good is the boner???
Along with that, if I'm distracted or anything changes during sex I quickly lose it even with a pill.

I have an appointment with a urologist who performs implants and I had told her about this visit a month or so ago.
Last night I said, "You know if pills stop working there are only 3 more options; shots, pumps and an implant.
She said, "You don't need an implant, why would you think that?"
I told her, "Because I want to be able to fuck you no questions asked. Anywhere, any time."
She reiterated, "Your dick is fine babe, you can get good boners.... but I don't know how all that works..."
I shrugged and said, "Well from this last year we know that it's not always a great boner. I avoid sex or we only have sex once every 2-3 weeks or I go soft mid sex or get soft while pleasuring her when I am mentally aroused but not physically..... This isn't because I lack desire but more I lack a unit I can rely on.... sidenote: The signals between testes and brain work fine too according to previous mentioned tests at urologist"

I left it at saying that she doesn't know if I have any physical problems and I don't know either. (She agreed)
So Nov 2nd, I'm going into my appointment with an open mind and curiosity. I hope there is nothing dangerously wrong (cancer etc) and if there are any physical limitations I think she'll be on board with an implant.

Funny enough she said her grandfather had an implant.
He suffered a spinal cord injury so he had one so he could still "pleasure the ladies"

Honestly, I have read so much about this stuff, I dream about an implant so I can be done thinking about it!
Pills are a guessing game with side-effects(my tinnitus is worse than ever), shots are delaying the inevitable not to mention leave side-effects, the pump is just an accident waiting to happen and could leave awful damage....
My threshold for pain is up there. I had a vasectomy at 31 and know that surgeons are not particular kind to the testicals when they are working in that area. I've played soccer lol so getting hit in the junk by a 30mph soccer ball is probably the closest I can get to the pain of this procedure....I have the vacation time and have learned enough on the board that early inflation is key to keeping size, and how important it is to rest a lot. Being relatively young I imagine my recovery would be around 2 weeks.....
We'll see what the doc thinks, his word is what I'll go off of.

Sorry got a bit ranty and rambly there....
I am like a lot of you, I just want to have a reliable unit and I want to bang the night away. Even after I cum I want to finish her off!

Despite what the pharmacist said, near the end of me taking Viagra I was taking two at a time. My doctor knew about it and told me that some guys have to have more drug than others.

Larry

[jackhammerdreamz]

tl;dr my gf thinks my dick should work "fine", but she doesn't know how "all that works..." I'm going to see a urologist who does implants(recommended on this site) Nov 2nd to get his thoughts/run tests...

It's been an ongoing elephant in the room.
I would have to take a pill (more often than she knows) and then try to perform long enough to satisfy her.
The last year it has been difficult to rise to and finish the task.(we've been together 3 years)
She has noticed this along with my penchant for skipping foreplay the moment I get an erection which leads to not satisfying her enough.
Gotta prime the pump before going for it as they say....

We last had sex 3 weeks ago and she didn't cum. She probably hasn't had an orgasm for the whole year....
So I popped a 100mg fildena before she got home last night.
We went to bed early and I spoon her. I got aroused and started rubbing her between the thighs. After a few minutes I slid down her panties to rub her clit a few more minutes.
I maintained an erection and slide it in, the angle has always been one that makes me cum far too fast.
I stayed hard afterwards thanks to the pill I took so she asked if I took a pill. I said I did.

I told her I wish I could fuck her more often, I love fucking her.
She says well why don't you?
I said well I'm not confident enough. My physical tools don't match my levels of wanting.
We have discussed this before and I went to a urologist recommended by my GP.
They ran the standard 2 or 3 tests and my testosterone came back within the appropriate range. So my drive should be normal for my age(33).
This urologist prescribed cialis which helped little(not much), but my insurance changed and I didn't bother to get a prior auth.
Currently I get generic viagra and cialis through the internet(ya probably not as strong)...

I told her that the pills don't always work well enough.
She said well when you can get hard you get a strong boner.(she doesn't know I take one every day in the off chance we have sex)
I said well if it's not hard at the right time what good is the boner???
Along with that, if I'm distracted or anything changes during sex I quickly lose it even with a pill.

I have an appointment with a urologist who performs implants and I had told her about this visit a month or so ago.
Last night I said, "You know if pills stop working there are only 3 more options; shots, pumps and an implant.
She said, "You don't need an implant, why would you think that?"
I told her, "Because I want to be able to fuck you no questions asked. Anywhere, any time."
She reiterated, "Your dick is fine babe, you can get good boners.... but I don't know how all that works..."
I shrugged and said, "Well from this last year we know that it's not always a great boner. I avoid sex or we only have sex once every 2-3 weeks or I go soft mid sex or get soft while pleasuring her when I am mentally aroused but not physically..... This isn't because I lack desire but more I lack a unit I can rely on.... sidenote: The signals between testes and brain work fine too according to previous mentioned tests at urologist"

I left it at saying that she doesn't know if I have any physical problems and I don't know either. (She agreed)
So Nov 2nd, I'm going into my appointment with an open mind and curiosity. I hope there is nothing dangerously wrong (cancer etc) and if there are any physical limitations I think she'll be on board with an implant.

Funny enough she said her grandfather had an implant.
He suffered a spinal cord injury so he had one so he could still "pleasure the ladies"

Honestly, I have read so much about this stuff, I dream about an implant so I can be done thinking about it!
Pills are a guessing game with side-effects(my tinnitus is worse than ever), shots are delaying the inevitable not to mention leave side-effects, the pump is just an accident waiting to happen and could leave awful damage....
My threshold for pain is up there. I had a vasectomy at 31 and know that surgeons are not particular kind to the testicals when they are working in that area. I've played soccer lol so getting hit in the junk by a 30mph soccer ball is probably the closest I can get to the pain of this procedure....I have the vacation time and have learned enough on the board that early inflation is key to keeping size, and how important it is to rest a lot. Being relatively young I imagine my recovery would be around 2 weeks.....
We'll see what the doc thinks, his word is what I'll go off of.

Sorry got a bit ranty and rambly there....
I am like a lot of you, I just want to have a reliable unit and I want to bang the night away. Even after I cum I want to finish her off!

Despite what the pharmacist said, near the end of me taking Viagra I was taking two at a time. My doctor knew about it and told me that some guys have to have more drug than others.

Larry

Yea I'll have to either cycle it on and off or up dosage.
I tried a cialis+dapoxetine drug and it makes me nauseous. So much for using that one.

Sick of the drugs for sure

[tomas1]

I realize this is the Implant Forum, but why not try injections before taking the next step?