FrankTalk.org

Hello . Am a 57 year old gay Male in Dublin Ireland . Have had Ed as long as I can remember. Went to urologist here who just said casually that I had venous leak and he showed me an implant . Nice guy but did no tests and just said I should think about it . My own GP just looked at me in horror when I mentioned ‘ implant ‘ and asked why on Earth I would want one !! This whole thing has caused me to feel like a non human being . I started a wonderful relationship a couple of years back with someone I truly loved but felt it ended because of me feeling so inadequate in the bedroom . It left me devastated . I had a partner for 25 years and it was not an issue because I felt really good with my partner . Unfortunately he died 8 years ago as a result of radiotherapy having been tested for a stage 1 cancer . It should not have happened as a clot developed in his leg and killed him before my eyes in a couple of minutes . Anyway am now looking to explore what an implant might be like as a veritable option . Think I would go to the States to have it done as volume seem to be important in terms of surgeon’s skill . If anybody would like to communicate I would be very grateful . Very alone with all this here Gay or straight doesn’t matter . They just talk about Viagra and Cialis here . Tried them to no avail . No Trimix available here . And the silence is the worst- as if one should never even dare bring it up . No pun intended. Many thanks for reading . Noel

where are you from my friend?

Noel,

Welcome.

I think you’ve come to the right place. Lots of great information and support here. I don’t think I could have made and stuck to the decision I made if it were not for this forum and it’s members.

You’re right, it is a lonely place. ED is just not a topic that you’ll find people comfortable enough to discuss — except here. Ask away! And feel free to PM me.

Wishing you the best.

Bob

Welcone to Franktalk, my Dubliner friend. Asking questions is good and it is sad you have a dearth of support where you live. Ireland is such a beautiful country in many other aspects.

Here you should find a safe place to express yourself.

Aside from oral and sex toy assisted expression of your physical love, there is vacuum-assisted sex Vacuum Erection Devices or VEDs). May I ask if you can climax through oral stimulation? I could, when I could no longer reliably penetrate my partner's vagina.

If VEDs are hard to find where you are, one can assemble one fairly easily from automotive parts (vacuum gauge, manual hydraulic brake line evacuation pump, tubing and a section of clear plastic pipe). That would leave only a constriction ring to fond and a way to put it on (and off). While this is for many, a solution just barely acceptable, some do find it practical.

Good luck, and welcome.

Latane wrote:Hello . Am a 57 year old gay Male in Dublin Ireland . Have had Ed as long as I can remember. Went to urologist here who just said casually that I had venous leak and he showed me an implant . Nice guy but did no tests and just said I should think about it . My own GP just looked at me in horror when I mentioned ‘ implant ‘ and asked why on Earth I would want one !! This whole thing has caused me to feel like a non human being . I started a wonderful relationship a couple of years back with someone I truly loved but felt it ended because of me feeling so inadequate in the bedroom . It left me devastated . I had a partner for 25 years and it was not an issue because I felt really good with my partner . Unfortunately he died 8 years ago as a result of radiotherapy having been tested for a stage 1 cancer . It should not have happened as a clot developed in his leg and killed him before my eyes in a couple of minutes . Anyway am now looking to explore what an implant might be like as a veritable option . Think I would go to the States to have it done as volume seem to be important in terms of surgeon’s skill . If anybody would like to communicate I would be very grateful . Very alone with all this here Gay or straight doesn’t matter . They just talk about Viagra and Cialis here . Tried them to no avail . No Trimix available here . And the silence is the worst- as if one should never even dare bring it up . No pun intended. Many thanks for reading . Noel

Please create a signature. It makes things much easier to answer your questions without asking a lot of questions. Here's how you do it
Click on your name in the top right corner and select "user control panel"

Then under the big letters "User Control Panel" there is a row of words... select "Profile"

Then down the left had side of the "User Control Panel" select "Edit Signature" (You might have Create Signature or something. I don't know exactly what you'll get because I already have a signature to edit)

Most guys put something like what I have, but you can put whatever you want. Here is mine -
51 years old, married 29 years. Implanted Mar 30/17 by Dr. Brock of London, Ont, CANADA. (AMS 700 CX 18 + 2). Had implant removed Apr 29/17 due to Septic Shock. Liposuction By Dr. Gan and re-implant by Dr. Brock (AMS LGX 15 + 2) Dec 14/17.

Don't get too carried away with the doctor like his name, address, phone number, etc (anything that looks like advertising for him).. you can certainly say Dr. Jones (great Dr.)

If you need further help, please ask, that's what I'm here for.

Larry
Moderator

Latane wrote:Hello . Am a 57 year old gay Male in Dublin Ireland . Have had Ed as long as I can remember. Went to urologist here who just said casually that I had venous leak and he showed me an implant . Nice guy but did no tests and just said I should think about it . My own GP just looked at me in horror when I mentioned ‘ implant ‘ and asked why on Earth I would want one !! This whole thing has caused me to feel like a non human being . I started a wonderful relationship a couple of years back with someone I truly loved but felt it ended because of me feeling so inadequate in the bedroom . It left me devastated . I had a partner for 25 years and it was not an issue because I felt really good with my partner . Unfortunately he died 8 years ago as a result of radiotherapy having been tested for a stage 1 cancer . It should not have happened as a clot developed in his leg and killed him before my eyes in a couple of minutes . Anyway am now looking to explore what an implant might be like as a veritable option . Think I would go to the States to have it done as volume seem to be important in terms of surgeon’s skill . If anybody would like to communicate I would be very grateful . Very alone with all this here Gay or straight doesn’t matter . They just talk about Viagra and Cialis here . Tried them to no avail . No Trimix available here . And the silence is the worst- as if one should never even dare bring it up . No pun intended. Many thanks for reading . Noel

Sorry to hear about the partner you lost. Cancer and radiotherapy are awful things.
Have you spoken to any sort of sex therapist that may be able to help you get past any mental blocks that may be coming into play?
We're not experts here, but I wonder if there is any grieving, or problems opening up sexually to a new person after such a sad loss.
Implantation is certainly an option if there are physical barriers to erection. You'd want further testing from a urologist.
You GP does not sound very understanding or sympathetic. I would perhaps find a urologist who is familiar with this subject and not your GP.
You are discussing an implant because you have struggled with ED for a long time and have not had success with "mainstream" solutions.

Quantity doesn't directly equate to quality. My surgeon only does a dozen or so a year and my implant was done perfectly.
Eid does thousands(I think?) and he's great too! I'd be curious if you could find a reputable surgeon nearer you.

It was a choice made easy for me because I knew I wanted to keep having a positive sexlife, and nothing on the market would work to my needs other than an Implant.

Let us know what other questions you have, take a look around the forum and you might find some answers on your own.
But we are here for YOU. PM us if you need anything or want to have a more private discussion.

Some of us hang our dirty laundry out in public, and some don't. Do whatever is comfortable for you.

Cheers

softtohard wrote:where are you from my friend?

Hi and thank you. I am from Dulbin Ireland

radioradio wrote:Noel,

Welcome.

I think you’ve come to the right place. Lots of great information and support here. I don’t think I could have made and stuck to the decision I made if it were not for this forum and it’s members.

You’re right, it is a lonely place. ED is just not a topic that you’ll find people comfortable enough to discuss — except here. Ask away! And feel free to PM me.

Wishing you the best.

Bob

Bob hope you get this as first time here. Thank you for your kinf reply. I will stay in touch. Nice to just be able to express oneself. Feels like getting out of prison!

Lost Sheep wrote:Welcone to Franktalk, my Dubliner friend. Asking questions is good and it is sad you have a dearth of support where you live. Ireland is such a beautiful country in many other aspects.

Here you should find a safe place to express yourself.

Aside from oral and sex toy assisted expression of your physical love, there is vacuum-assisted sex Vacuum Erection Devices or VEDs). May I ask if you can climax through oral stimulation? I could, when I could no longer reliably penetrate my partner's vagina.

If VEDs are hard to find where you are, one can assemble one fairly easily from automotive parts (vacuum gauge, manual hydraulic brake line evacuation pump, tubing and a section of clear plastic pipe). That would leave only a constriction ring to fond and a way to put it on (and off). While this is for many, a solution just barely acceptable, some do find it practical.

Good luck, and welcome.

Thank you so much. I have never enjoyed receiving oral . My preferred way to climax is masturbation and i have to be erect to ejaculate which used to be wonderful until i started taking phenergan(antihistamine) for sleep. Still ejaculate and it can be just as good as when i was 20! My erection is the real problem. VED's are on sale here and online. Never tried one. Might just do. Imagine i probably need an implabnt at this stage. Thank you for replying. Really appreciated .And yes Ireland is nice and farly open-ed just sucks i guess( sorry for yet another horrible unitended pun)

jackhammerdreamz wrote:

Latane wrote:Hello . Am a 57 year old gay Male in Dublin Ireland . Have had Ed as long as I can remember. Went to urologist here who just said casually that I had venous leak and he showed me an implant . Nice guy but did no tests and just said I should think about it . My own GP just looked at me in horror when I mentioned ‘ implant ‘ and asked why on Earth I would want one !! This whole thing has caused me to feel like a non human being . I started a wonderful relationship a couple of years back with someone I truly loved but felt it ended because of me feeling so inadequate in the bedroom . It left me devastated . I had a partner for 25 years and it was not an issue because I felt really good with my partner . Unfortunately he died 8 years ago as a result of radiotherapy having been tested for a stage 1 cancer . It should not have happened as a clot developed in his leg and killed him before my eyes in a couple of minutes . Anyway am now looking to explore what an implant might be like as a veritable option . Think I would go to the States to have it done as volume seem to be important in terms of surgeon’s skill . If anybody would like to communicate I would be very grateful . Very alone with all this here Gay or straight doesn’t matter . They just talk about Viagra and Cialis here . Tried them to no avail . No Trimix available here . And the silence is the worst- as if one should never even dare bring it up . No pun intended. Many thanks for reading . Noel

Sorry to hear about the partner you lost. Cancer and radiotherapy are awful things.
Have you spoken to any sort of sex therapist that may be able to help you get past any mental blocks that may be coming into play?
We're not experts here, but I wonder if there is any grieving, or problems opening up sexually to a new person after such a sad loss.
Implantation is certainly an option if there are physical barriers to erection. You'd want further testing from a urologist.
You GP does not sound very understanding or sympathetic. I would perhaps find a urologist who is familiar with this subject and not your GP.
You are discussing an implant because you have struggled with ED for a long time and have not had success with "mainstream" solutions.

Quantity doesn't directly equate to quality. My surgeon only does a dozen or so a year and my implant was done perfectly.
Eid does thousands(I think?) and he's great too! I'd be curious if you could find a reputable surgeon nearer you.

It was a choice made easy for me because I knew I wanted to keep having a positive sexlife, and nothing on the market would work to my needs other than an Implant.

Let us know what other questions you have, take a look around the forum and you might find some answers on your own.

But we are here for YOU. PM us if you need anything or want to have a more private discussion.

Some of us hang our dirty laundry out in public, and some don't. Do whatever is comfortable for you.

Cheers

Thank you for your sympathy on Jim's death. It was awful. I am concerned about the surgeon as once they go in there is not turning back.Happy it worked so well for you. Noel