Am I crazy for wanting an implant

[Bizzmann]

Quick background; prostatectomy 1/18 with followup radiation and Lupron therapy (what a god awful drug). ED ever since (tablets didn’t work and injections caused long lasting painful erections/ or didn’t work that great.

Sex with wife prior to surgery sporadic (typical post menopausal problems) and not very satisfying. Masterbation became my primary “enjoyable” relief.

Not getting erections has impacted me emotionally and to an extent, physically. I’ve considered counseling but I don’t think it will change how I feel (which is pissed off how prostatectomy left me).

Any of you who’ve had implant do it mostly for your own mental well being? Is it worth the pain and surgical recovery? AM I CRAZY???????

Thanks for feedback. I have surgical consultation in a couple weeks.

[clayton2526]

No Bizzman,
You're not crazy by a long shot. Find a great surgeon, move forward with the implant, and after a year, you won't believe you even asked the question!

[Lost Sheep]

Go ahead with BOTH surgical consultation and psychological consultation. Many men live happy lives with alternate sexual outlets (oral sex, masturbation, asexuality, etc) and many men find their self-image requires the ability to have erections. (Testimony here supports the happiness that men, even without any sex of any kind, that men derive simply from having the validation of an erection, while many men do not require that validation to be equally happy with themselves. No fault lies with either attitude, to my mind.)

The cost, pain and risk of surgery are not insignificant. A nice sports car or bass boat will cost you about as much and have the same service life and a kitchen remodel might actually improve your wife's adoration of you (please pardon the sexist nature of that stereotype) to the point that she might participate in sexual adventure with you.

If you do elect for the surgery, please PLEASE get your wife on board with the idea. Let her know it is not just sex for yourself that you want, but self-image and sex for HER. It might be worthwhile you both to discuss the current state of your sexual relationship (and romantic relationship) with her gynecologist or a relationship counselor. There are many reasons for a woman's disinterest in sex to grow as she ages; many of them are simply physical and easily treatable and many are relational and almost as easily treatable.

Women are INCREDIBLY supportive if they feel acknowledged, respected, included, heard and safe in a relationship. Make her feel that way about you. You need her along on this journey.

You are not crazy. I am single and went ahead with the surgery with no firm expectation of having a relationship, but knowing sexual relations were off the table if I didn't. After the surgery, I am thrilled to be able to be erect regardless of my opportunities to use it. I thank God for my girlfriend who relishes our use of it. I pray your wife will get on board, for both of your sakes.

[oldbeek]

With PC I am assuming you are 65 or over. Did your URO say he spared any of your nerves? If he did, erections may come back. Average is 24 months. PC surgery is such BS. MY surgeon removed all my nerves. Looks like you also rushed into that choice. I was so pissed, I had PTSD, Until I realized it was a stupid mistake and I could not change anything. My wife and I were having sex up until the PC surgery. She was not on board with the implant and now finds it repulsive. WTF.. I wanted it back and I have it. I needed it as my state of mind was not good. At times when driving or out shooting, these feelings of rage would come over me, like I wanted to kill someone, or crash my car into something. If these are your feelings, get the implant. It will definitely help your state of mind.

[544kenmatt]

I say do it. I regretted it at first, but now i'm nine months out and glad I did it. I've had lots of abdominal surgery as well and was concerned about the reservoir placement, but so far, no problems and i dont feel it's presence at all.
My friends thought I was nuts for doing it (I heard this through the grapevine) but this is your body and your mind. I chose to ignore them and followed my heart. I was one of the unlucky ones who had a longer recovery than normal, but things are working fine now and it has hugely boosted my sexual confidence.

[Gt1956]

Quick background; prostatectomy 1/18 with followup radiation and Lupron therapy (what a god awful drug). ED ever since (tablets didn’t work and injections caused long lasting painful erections/ or didn’t work that great.

Sex with wife prior to surgery sporadic (typical post menopausal problems) and not very satisfying. Masterbation became my primary “enjoyable” relief.

Not getting erections has impacted me emotionally and to an extent, physically. I’ve considered counseling but I don’t think it will change how I feel (which is pissed off how prostatectomy left me).

Any of you who’ve had implant do it mostly for your own mental well being? Is it worth the pain and surgical recovery? AM I CRAZY???????

Thanks for feedback. I have surgical consultation in a couple weeks.

Are you crazy for wanting to feel as close to your pre cancer self as possible. No, not any crazier than a woman that wants breast reconstruction after breast cancer. I'm pretty sure that most people wouldn't call those women crazy.
I suggest that getting the ability to get an erection back could help give you the strength to help your wife resolve her health issues later. She might see the logic to visit a good doctor to help with the menopause problems. Many times those issues can be fixed well enough to have good sex into old age. FT has several members that have regular satisfying sex in their late 70's.
You are not crazy at all.

[will1948]

I had my implant in May of this year. It’s only been a few months but so far it has been wonderful. I don’t miss the pills and the associated headaches or sticking needles in my penis. I would do it all over again!

[oldbeek]

Just looking at your past posts. You are in Florida. Perito in Coral Gables is the best down there. Look up on U-Tube, "Meet the Penis", that is his program. You also have climactura, peeing during orgasm, Me also. No wonder your wife is turned off with the whole thing. Get the implant and ask Perito about the Boston Scientific artificial spincher aus 800. I don't think he will do both at the same time. I still had climactura after my implant and had the aus installed. Hope wife will be more receptive to sex when this gets healed up and activated.

[SW0110]

I had very little pain with my first implant and less with my revision. More aggravating than anything. It stays pointing out till things soften up some.

As far as cost. I have insurance. First one was about a 1000. Revision was even less.

So in my case. Very little pain or cost involved.

I loved my titan. Love this lgx. Like I said many times.

This thing breaks, getting it fixed. Did it for me. Also am within 1/8 of my pre ed size after dealing with peyronies, ed, hourglassing, and shrinkage for 3 years. Implanted since march 2019. Failed after hernia surgery in jan 2020. Revision march 2020.

Get it and do not look back.

[Lost Sheep]

Get it and do not look back.

I disagree. I look back all the time....and rejoice for the choice I made.

I also looked FORWARD before making that choice. Very thoroughly.