Penis Version 2.0 - Ongoing Journal

[stephen54]

I recall Dr. Perito talking about some men at the beach in Florida that keep it inflated all the time. He had a name that the locals call them but I forget it. He said that some of them have been erect so much that they can't deflate them. I don't recall him saying why but I'll guess that the reservoir has become encapsulated with scar tissue. Not allowing the fluid to fit back it.
I personally doubt that an occasional extended inflation period would lead to that condition. But it might be safe to make sure that you completely defate it & leave it that way after the extended inflation. Cheap insurance so to say.

That's great. My kind of beach...

Good comments by all, thank you.

I wasn't really considering some kind of extended inflation regimen. Just curious I guess. After last night's little episode I started thinking about how many hours per week, on average, my dick is already inflated to some degree. I'm talking about being inflated specifically for sex. I got out of the habit of daily cycling. I'm aware now that I probably should not have stopped that. Maybe. I know there's no real consensus on that point. My surgeon is very skeptical that any appreciable size can be regained after this much time has elapsed since surgery. So I stopped that daily habit of cycling probably around the 5-6 month mark and my rationale was that we are having plenty of sex, mostly probably 4 days a week average, and that my dick is inflated plenty often and definitely for some longer durations.

So I don't know. Total inflation time in a week...it's probably something like 5-6 hours a week spread across 7 days. I don't know. Two long/marathon sessions, two shorter ones, give or take. 1.5-2 hours for the marathons, 10-30 minutes on the quickies. Oh...right...throw in some sessions of self-love, too. So I feel like it's getting a pretty solid amount of use and we're definitely putting it through its paces.

Seeing my doc in a couple weeks for one year follow up, will add this to my list...

[hopeful_future]

I wouldn't say I'm "comfortable" tucking my dick down today, even, and I'm almost at the one year mark. Comfortable just isn't the word I'd use. But I'm now able to tuck my dick down at the 6 o'clock position, more or less, and it is just a progression where, as the months go by, all of a sudden I'll realize, "hey, that's sort of more pliable and hanging better now".

Earlier on I was fighting my dick and it was fighting me back, just to get into pants, shorts, a suit, without making a fucking scene. I was extremely aware of my dick constantly in the earlier months post-implant. Now my dick feels absolutely natural and part of me most of the day and in most situations. It's an ever-evolving thing but always incrementally better. It's really just over the last couple months I feel where I've realized enough progress with tucking it down that it feels (almost, sort of, kind of, pretty close to) natural.

I actually think underwear choice is key. Seriously. I've tried a bunch. Have found a specific Adidas and a specific Tommy Hilfiger microfiber boxer brief that have really made a big difference for me. It's the particular way these have a dick pouch sewn in a way where the pouch extends forward from the body, slightly, but still provides a downward compression. But - a gentle downward compression. These things saved me.

Things are already way better than they were when I last posted this. I'm starting to have an ever so slight downward hang when deflated, and I can pretty easily tuck to one side or the other without it being uncomfortable. I can finally do things like sleep on my side or nearly on my stomach if I like, and I don't feel like I'm going to crush my nuts on the pump.

The underwear is a helpful piece of info...Right now I've been wearing sepratech for day to day workwear, and tucking to either side. For workouts, I wear some aussibum briefs, which keep things very tightly against my body. Eventually, it would be nice to have the option of bending forward and down, so I'll look into the Adidas boxer briefs!

Best wishes and hope things are going great for you!

[stephen54]

...I can finally do things like sleep on my side or nearly on my stomach if I like, and I don't feel like I'm going to crush my nuts on the pump.

That part is awesome. Dammit man, I haven't quite gotten there yet. Used to love laying on my stomach. It's truly the only physical position I get into where I am acutely aware of my implant these days...

[stephen54]

I've tried to keep a somewhat regular update here as to my implant experiences, for whatever they may be worth for other guys either considering implantation or just curious and trying to validate their own post-implant experiences. I hit the one year mark two weeks ago. (With the exception of the social apocalypse underway in the U.S.) it's been a great year since I was implanted back on 11/18/2019. I saw my surgeon coincidentally on the one year anniversary, a couple weeks ago.

I know I gave a fairly detailed update at around the 9 or 10 month mark. All that stuff still stands. I am very happy with my results thus far. I guess the key points of interest might include (in no particular order):

We are having whatever kind of sex we want, whenever, wherever, and with literally no time limits. The implant works as promised (it's an iron bar in 60-90 seconds of pumping and it's unstoppable; there are other things about it that are clearly not what Coloplast claims...I've detailed those previously and they're still the same). It's pretty incredible overall though. Fairly miraculous actually. My recovery was easy and fast, I had a very talented surgeon who did his thing and left me with almost no bruising, scars, pain, etc and I was on a reasonably quick path back to sex.

It's important to re-state my/our particular goals going in to this process...we wanted problem-free and, to the extent possible, process-free, and frequent, energetic sex...and we wanted freedom to play and do whatever might cross our minds and do it with spontaneity.

I went into this understanding and assuming there would be some changes and some post-op things I would need to adjust to and reconcile with in exchange for a prosthetic fully functioning erection. I was correct.

So the pros, so far:

Anxiety 100% gone.

Dick always ready (helpful because libido remains out of control).

Hard as steel.

Can go for hours, do absolutely anything we might want, plus some shit that, due to the unpredictability of my ED/dick prior, were either not workable or not the way we wanted it to be.

So, overall? Absolute home run as far as the most critical goals we had which mattered most.

Mental bullshit? Poof. Gone.

Functionality? Complete workhorse of a dick.

It's an absolute fucking trooper, and we've put it through its paces this year. Probably having sex on average 4x week. One or two quickies and usually two longer weekend sessions. We tend to start, stop, start, stop etc over several hours. We shift gears, but I leave myself usually fully or mostly fully inflated throughout. No pain. Or...not what I'd call pain anyway, and it takes a lot to get to that point. Honestly, the only discomfort the implant has given me (since I got past the initial cycling) is two times when I've stayed inflated arguably too long. Once we fell asleep and I was inside her. I woke up after several hours still max inflated. Might have been 6 hours total give or take. Shaft and glans was mildly tender. It passed within a day or so. Another time I was inflated about 4 hours and we had done some...aggressive things. Same result...mild tenderness which passed fairly quickly.

Oh - another positive - anal opened up for us this year. I believe I described this earlier either here or in someone else's thread somewhere, but this is related to the size loss I'm about to describe below. We were both motivated around anal before and we tried, but with mixed success (mostly it was very challenging and only a few times enjoyable for her) due to my girth prior. Different day now. Anal works now and she is way further along with making it work and with actually legitimately enjoying it than I ever would have imagined. She's initiating anal now sometimes. Never thought we'd get there, and I have this inexplicable post-implant size loss to "thank"...

So on a scale of 0-10 with 0 being "disastrous" and 10 being "entirely perfect" I would rate this total experience this year as an 8 or 8.5. I just asked my wife to do the same. She said for her it's a 7 (for reasons noted below).

Adjustments include:

One full inch of both girth and length loss. 7.5" down to 6.5" length. 6.75" or so down to 5.75" girth. (and, related)

Glans only very, very minimally engorges, (no comparison remotely to what it was prior. My surgeon's measurements tell us that the majority, if not all of my loss of length, is attributable to this non-engorging glans. Given clean bill of penile health otherwise. When we talk about the actual functional issue around why it's not engorging, it's of course a bit of a mystery. As it has been to countless other guys. I had some venous leakage prior. Maybe it got exacerbated through the trauma of implant surgery. Maybe all sorts of things. Who knows).

All the size losses were initially, and for a little while this year, in the early going, pretty annoying honestly. My surgeon was a bit skeptical about that degree of size loss until he meticulously measured me 2 weeks ago and compared those measurement to my pre-op. He confirmed my at home measurements. Well, I've got the anatomy I've got, what the hell are you going to really do about it, right? I've just got a lot of implant buried back secured into my pelvis. 4.5" of my Titan's total 11" length is hidden away and acting as my dick's foundation. So I've got what I've got. It does take some adjusting. Mentally, because I've been very familiar with my own dick for a lot of years and I know what it looks and feels like. This guy feels different. Not bad. Just different. So there's a bit of an alien factor to it. My wife knows my dick. Or, knew my old dick pretty damn well. This one's a bit of a stranger to her, too. There's been some mental adjustments for her part as a result.

She's had to work through, and past, her sensory input (it's visually different, it feels different in her hand, her mouth, her vagina). These adjustments have been more significant for her than for me. We are working through these. It's not been an instant "oh, awesome, new dick, hahahaha it's PERFECT!!" sort of year. We are trying to have some humor with it all. Without that, you're screwed I think. When she comes up against something odd or different, we are making sure she acknowledges whatever that thought/feeling may be and she's open and communicating it to me. I don't always have the perfect response or solution, but we just find the communication to be vital. We are both very, very clear with one another that we traded a pretty big but perpetually non-compliant ED dick, for a slightly above average dick that has seemingly no functional limitations. We made a bargain. We, on most days, are very mindful and very thankful for the situation we find ourselves in, even with the changes. We gained the most fundamental trait of all: simple, fast, forever-hard function.

But - she's a penetration girl. The lost girth and formerly fat glans were important to her. She can come fast with a combination of penetration and clitoral stimulation, like a lot of girls I suppose. But she can also come from g-spot stimulation alone. However...she's also not entirely motivated by orgasm. She likes to fuck, often until she's sore. She loves the experience and as great as an orgasm can be, she's sometimes conditioned herself that orgasm = the end. So we like long sessions. During longer sessions, it's more obvious to her over a longer period of time having sex that I am not pushing her, internally, as I used to. She's small and fit and she's tight, but even so, there are times where my diminished girth is more apparent and she/we try to adjust and go with it positively instead of pretending it's not happening.

So in full disclosure, I'll give one example of a practical change we've made here and there. We have a veritable factory of toys. We both love playing with all kinds of crazy shit. Vibes, dildos, bluetooth/remote devices, etc. So we've experimented with double penetrating her...my dick and a toy. We've done this prior. We're kind of narrowing it down to the toys which, when combined alongside my dick, push her to feel very full, kind of approximating my pre-implant girth and feel. Some don't really provide the correct sensation...some do amazingly well. The semi-firm silicones work best for us. (Current fave is Lovense's Lush 2...it's so versatile and fun it's ridiculous). I love it. She loves it. Sometimes I control things, sometimes she controls the toy. There's the fullness factor for her and there's of course the dirty factor of being double penetrated and that's obviously all good shit, too. Sometimes when I'm inside her she will reach for my hand and guide it to her...encouraging me to finger her while we fuck. So then my fingers (or sometimes...even better...her fingers) are in there sharing space with my dick. Fingers easily curl upward toward her g-spot, this is real and sets her the hell off when combined with my dick thrusting. We are sort of approaching all this with a "whatever it takes" mantra. At least we know my dick won't let us down. The rest is all a new road of experimentation and there's just an invaluable intimacy to experimentation and pushing borders and routines.

So I don't know if my rattling on here makes sense or is helpful. I'm just suggesting that, for those who may find themselves in the similar situation with a size loss...we recommend you embrace that situation, row in the same direction with your partner, be open, hear her/him, keep your humor, try things, be open, try other things, etc. Just have a lot of sex. Then have more sex. There's no substitute, and the best of us can get too god-awful fucking cerebral about it all.

Glans is frequently cold.

I don't know what else to say about that. Also annoying, and chiefly because she is very aware of this new little feature. It can be almost icy cold. Obviously we just play and do things to help it warm up. But she reports to me that this chill on my glans serves to remind her that things are different. She says the coldness equates with something "clinical" to her. And "clinical" isn't exactly the vibe we're looking for.

Her adjustment factor to my dick appearing mostly ready all the time.

My flaccid is still fairly firm. It's much bigger than pre-op. It's a little more pliable and movable and flexible, and with a little less hassle than in the early months. But it is undoubtedly bigger when flaccid and, in my wife's mind, if she sees some firmness then she equates that with the fact that it must be time to have sex. Or that I want that. Or that I expect that, in that moment. Which, despite my overload libido, is not always true. She rationally knows that there is a prosthesis in there taking up space and forcing my flaccid to be more than the flaccid she knew prior. But still, the image through my boxers or even pants or just coming out of the shower, whatever...the image that I am (in her mind) 60-70% hard...is a signal that it's time to get at it. Not a horrible situation to have, mind you. She just has to keep overruling her immediate reaction that I seemingly want to fuck when she's at her computer, walking the dog, making coffee, reading a book...she was curious/concerned when I went into this that, given the new prosthetic capabilities, I would be maniacally attacking her 24/7 with my new dick. Of course that's not the case. Ahem. So it's interesting to hear her explain that odd disconnect for her...that she sees "hard" (even though it's not) and she has to do some mental gymnastics around whether she thinks I'm ready or signaling etc. It's a zero issue to me but it's on her radar.

Can't really think of anything else at present. I'm sure I'm missing things. Someone will ask and remind me what I haven't covered, I suppose. It's really just been a great year overall and getting better and better.

Best of luck to all!

[barrylandon]

Your journal posts are always informative and engaging. Thanks for putting in the time to write them. In your last post, you mentioned that you're not getting blood flow to your glans so not much engorgement going on. But how does this affect your orgasms and ejaculations? I have the same problem with lack of glans engorgement but it has been impossible for me to orgasm or ejaculate with my sexy wife. Even masturbation with visual stimulation takes a very long time for orgasm/ejaculation to happen (or not!). I'm currently experimenting with inserting a phentolamine gel into my urethra but it hasn't produced any engorgement, I've got one more gel to try that's a bi-mix of the phentolamine with aprostadil. However, I approach this with trepidation because when I injected alprostadil into my shaft prior to my IPP surgery, I had to make 4 trips to the ER for Priapism and the erections hurt like hell. So I'm hopeful the bi-mix will work without the terrible side effects.

[stephen54]

Your journal posts are always informative and engaging. Thanks for putting in the time to write them. In your last post, you mentioned that you're not getting blood flow to your glans so not much engorgement going on. But how does this affect your orgasms and ejaculations? I have the same problem with lack of glans engorgement but it has been impossible for me to orgasm or ejaculate with my sexy wife. Even masturbation with visual stimulation takes a very long time for orgasm/ejaculation to happen (or not!). I'm currently experimenting with inserting a phentolamine gel into my urethra but it hasn't produced any engorgement, I've got one more gel to try that's a bi-mix of the phentolamine with aprostadil. However, I approach this with trepidation because when I injected alprostadil into my shaft prior to my IPP surgery, I had to make 4 trips to the ER for Priapism and the erections hurt like hell. So I'm hopeful the bi-mix will work without the terrible side effects.

I learned so much from other guys here back when I was lurking a few years ago and just reading and reading and processing thoughts, making my notes. It is fulfilling to talk to guys here now and then and share experiences or just validate, encourage and see forward progress, for sure.

The glans and orgasms and masturbation. You reminded me of some things and they're sort of instructive I guess.

I can definitely still have really intense, extremely satisfying orgasms during masturbation. We have pretty frequent sex, but my libido really is mostly off the rails, so I do also masturbate fairly frequently. Several times in a typical week. Often on off days when we don't have sex. Sometimes on days we DO have sex (but I didn't know we were going to have sex, right? Might masturbate in the AM then we have sex at night. Fortunately the implant of course supports my frequently delinquent behavior). I still find my dick, overall, shaft, glans, underneath, very similarly sensitive to what I had prior to implant. My sac/balls are less sensitive, noticeably so, but that was never really important to me.

With masturbation now I find my best enjoyment/technique mostly identical to what it was prior to implant. I either want to get off really quickly or I want to settle in a little bit and enjoy a longer chunk of me time. If I just want fast...I typically use a vibrator. I have my favorite. Still have the same awesome orgasms I always had with that thing. I honestly don't discern a real difference from prior I don't think. I can come in probably a minute or less. Maybe 2 minutes tops. Original Hitachi magic wand on low. Truly magic. Oddly, it didn't work for her, so it's my go-to. A bit loud, and not the most discrete toy, but we're empty nesters and we've earned our right to noisily masturbate.

If I have more time, I will probably chuck the vibrator and stroke myself with my hands. It's very possible that these days I am using more firm pressure. I do know that these days now I don't enjoy so much masturbating by hand, dry, without some sort of lubricant. That's different from prior. Before implant I definitely would masturbate without lube. Now I've become kind of a big fan of grapeseed oil. We use it as a massage oil due to its properties of a tiny bit going a long way and it remaining slick but not too slick and for a long period of time. Anyway, if I'm masturbating like this, I do find it very enjoyable and I can direct and control my orgasms well. I'm edging myself more these days, time permitting.

While I imagine I have been fortunate to maintain this (based on what some of the guys share here) I think it's probably fair to say that these days it takes a bit firmer grip for me. I'm more focused on my shaft, that's where I find my pleasure masturbating, but that was actually always the case.

With my wife...yes, for sure, there are plenty of times now where, with vaginal penetration alone, I am not quite able to come. Sometimes I just don't. I feel very very very close...but there's a point where it just seems for whatever reason like I'm going to miss and I shift gears and resign myself to missing and it's all actually fine with me. Really. Not infrequently, after she comes, we'll work me to orgasm some way or another. She'll masturbate me firmly with her hands or she will use a vibe or toy on me, and I'll always come from that. So yes, for sure, there can occasionally be a barrier of some sort with coming in her vagina now. I don't know. Sometimes in this situation when I withdraw from her vagina she'll ask me to masturbate for her and I will and minutes after not being quite able to come in her vagina I do come from masturbating openly for her and I love it and come like crazy. Paging Dr. Freud. Dr. Freud...???? I don't know why that's the way it is! Or...also...sometimes I stay in her vagina and one of us will masturbate my shaft into her. Again...most always ends in a fun orgasm. No clue why, or what's different. She says it's just a little dirtier - like I am using her for my pleasure. I don't pretend to understand most of this, I just roll with it...

But I don't believe for a minute that this is a purely mental thing for me, that just doesn't wash for us. She wants me to come in her, asks for it, always has, and my coming will accelerate her orgasm greatly. Which I sometimes want but sometimes don't (or not yet anyway). As I've said, she's plenty tight in my opinion, it's just that the other variable - my dick size - has shifted smaller. So less friction for me. I'm wondering if the post-implant guys who experienced diminished ability to orgasm during penetration, maybe those guys always predominantly found their pleasure/orgasm chiefly due to their having a particularly sensitive glans - and maybe I'm different because glans sensitivity was seemingly never the primary driver of my orgasm. I really don't know. I do know that, if she comes...we're mostly close to being done. She is only very rarely a multi-orgasm girl. She's 90% of the time working her way up, up up to the one bone-rattling orgasm. Then she's obliterated and wants to sleep soon. Kind of a dude, that way.

Also, having my orgasm with her (in her) it's truly just not my own primary driver. I enjoy the journey itself too much to get super focused on the seemingly logical end result, ie orgasms. They're awesome obviously. I want them, obviously. It's just that, with her(and this feeling precedes my implant) I mostly just want to be able to go and go for a really extended period of time. Long, extended, creative sessions trump orgasm for me almost always. Before implant, back during the days of pills and then injections, I had trained myself to not come. Or, better said...to not come for a very very long time until I decided specifically that I would come. I found real control and joy in the prolonged experience of lovemaking and I think, over a number of years (when I first met her, after I was divorced) this sort of became our thing with one another. We were both highly sexual people coming from marriages with less-than-sexual (perfunctory) partners prior. So she and I found ourselves both so happy and motivated to delay orgasm in lieu of longer, more intense, more extended sessions. There's some mental gymnastics in play here for she and I that I think are relevant - I mean...both of us de-emphasize our own orgasms during, probably, the majority of our sessions. I have no idea how common this may be.

As to times where I choose to drive quickly to orgasm during sex with her, I think that's a big part of why, if I'm being honest here, I am finding anal so appealing these days. I don't see anal as ever becoming our primary, our go-to sex act, but god almighty the friction and tightness is just ridiculous and intensely addictive, just no way around that. There's of course also the taboo/dirty factor of it all and I suppose you can't underestimate how the mental dirtiness enhances and encourages orgasm, too. Her bum is an absolute fucking vice grip. It takes all the control I can summon to delay coming in her. She knows it, too. She uses that knowledge as power, as a tool. If she senses me (in her vagina) wanting to come at some point but not quite being able to get there, she will sometimes say something filthy about her ass or she will just roll over and...present it as (sorry, crude here, but true) a willing come receptacle. She will switch from vaginal to anal to tip me over. 100% effectiveness ratio. She understands the power she wields.

I think I mentioned, my surgeon did encourage some experimentation with a good quality vacuum device and/or some appropriate constriction rings. I know there are guys here having some success better engorging their glans by using these methods. Am still undecided. I'm resistant to adding devices to build out some bigger more involved process of having sex. That's the precise opposite of what I sought in pursuing implantation. I acknowledge that there are guys having successes with all that, I'm just unconvinced it's important enough to me at this point. Sex is different but great these days. But to be fair, it'll at some point be a dialogue I return to with my wife. Maybe the glans engorgement isn't something I care one way or the other to mess with via vacuum, rings, or topicals/intra-urethrals...but maybe she will at some point want to try some of those, based on her experiences being on the receiving end of a now-smaller dick.

Have tried 100mg Viagra 2x in recent weeks to see if any effect. Jury still out. Both times I sort of liked the fact that I had some sense of that old familiar feeling of little rushes and whooshes of blood moving through my dick during foreplay. That part was cool. I didn't tell her either time that I had taken the Viagra (I wanted an unbiased reaction, ie, if I said nothing, was she independently going to notice and then mention any perceived difference/improvement from her point of view?). First time she did not say anything. Second time she asked me immediately afterward if I had taken something. She said it felt different and bigger. She knew my surgeon had suggested trying Viagra because she came with me to my last visit. More to be learned there I think. I frankly didn't visually see nor did I necessarily feel enhanced engorgement with the Viagra, but maybe I'm not the best judge of some of this stuff anymore and maybe she is...

Sorry. Long ass reply.

But you got me thinking and sort of tumbling all these variables in my mind again. For whatever it may be worth, god knows.

[LookingUp]

Sir, your post are anything but Long, dragged out or boring. Lots of honest, detailed, situational observation. Kind of stuff only found in Medical/Psych research papers. Now, those are boring to read.

At times I feel a little jealous but always finish your posts with appreciation that someone is telling the Fine details of living with an Implant. Mental/Physical everyday truths. The fact you're an oversexed Beast draws my envy. But, I'm a great Cook.

Thanks for posting your thoughts/experiences.

LUp

[stephen54]

Sir, your post are anything but Long, dragged out or boring. Lots of honest, detailed, situational observation. Kind of stuff only found in Medical/Psych research papers. Now, those are boring to read.

At times I feel a little jealous but always finish your posts with appreciation that someone is telling the Fine details of living with an Implant. Mental/Physical everyday truths. The fact you're an oversexed Beast draws my envy. But, I'm a great Cook.

Thanks for posting your thoughts/experiences.

LUp

HAHAHAH!! That's awesome. Love it! Haven't seen that thread here yet on FT, so maybe you're the guy to start the Cooking and Sex discussion...

But I think great cooking and great sex and intimacy are closely related kissing cousins, right? At minimum, they're both precursors for the other. Sex makes us hungry. And thoughtful cooking for someone else is sensual as hell...foreplay.

I am just an exceedingly fortunate guy, nothing more or less. The blessing is that I (we) recognize this in real time. Found the right girl, in my 40s, after a 20 year marriage which resulted in great children but which was never really anything close to an intimacy/sexual mesh. So I mostly stumbled into living the blessing every day now. She and I both are people who worry about our time on this Earth. Maybe "worry" is too strong. Maybe more like...we are keenly aware of time, so we are motivated to eat up experiences...now. We found one another near mid-life (we hope) and we are made from the same boundary-pushing stuff. It ain't perfect, but also...it's perfect.

With this implant business...I don't know...sometimes the little things are the big things. My wife's voice I'm sure is not atypical, and I think has real relevance to this discussion of guys considering and then living with their implant decision. We don't exist as guys in a vacuum. My wife has surprised me and she has laid some things open and bare for me to be aware of considering through her eyes. I'm sure plenty of our partners are having plenty of thoughts and experiences. What a hell of an opportunity for us guys if only we listen and maybe occasionally share those thoughts/dynamics with others in the same boat, right?

** By my count you are a mere 52 days away from taking the big implant step. So the countdown is on. Congratulations! Seriously exciting! Will be very interested and motivated to hear your experiences afterward, please keep us updated!**

[barrylandon]

stephen54...
You wrote, "She is only very rarely a multi-orgasm girl. She's 90% of the time working her way up, up up to the one bone-rattling orgasm. Then she's obliterated and wants to sleep soon. Kind of a dude, that way."
After reading this, I was certain that we're married to the same woman! Then you mentioned anal play and well, uh, nope, we definitely don't have the same wife!

[stephen54]

stephen54...
You wrote, "She is only very rarely a multi-orgasm girl. She's 90% of the time working her way up, up up to the one bone-rattling orgasm. Then she's obliterated and wants to sleep soon. Kind of a dude, that way."
After reading this, I was certain that we're married to the same woman! Then you mentioned anal play and well, uh, nope, we definitely don't have the same wife!

HA! But never say never!

Mine was skeptical at best, years ago. She had an experience with her ex which was not positive. She's a what the hell/can-do girl though. Ultimately took us a couple years to intermittently work up through fingers, to little plugs, finally to my old pre-implant dick. Not easy for her and not particularly enjoyable for either of us as a result. Kind of a setback, really, because she did find pleasure in smaller less-threatening anal toys but usually not in isolation (she enjoyed careful anal penetration while I was in her vagina...the crazy fullness factor). My sincere advice if you try is to keep it very minimal...finger only...externally only at first...and with ridiculous amounts of good lube...and try while she is absolutely as turned on as turned on gets, during vaginal sex. And maybe not try exploring there every time. Spread out the experimentation.

Go bravely, man! If it's not her thing, it's not her thing. Seems like she should definitively do the investigative leg work, though

Also...Christmas is coming.....