Wife is against me getting an implant

[Gt1956]

I would suggest to you to ask her of the sources that she has claimed to of researched. My guess is that she can't find them now. Or perhaps they are folklore handed down by her circle of friends.
I know that it might sound callous on my part. But I would suggest that under no circumstance should you have unprotected sex with her. The last thing you need at this stage is more/another child to support.
Also, some cya is in order. Document her employment for the last year. Make 2 or more copies of all of your tax forms & documents. Keep 1 set somewhere other than the communal house. If your checking is joint. Remove all of the extra checks from the house. Keep a close eye on the checkbook & watch for checks disappearing out of the back of the checkpad.
Divorce insurance can really pay off. I've had friends that were hit smack in the face even when they doubted that a divorce was coming.
Be vigilant. Good luck.

[Txagq8]

Another vote for “my body, my choice.”

This reminds me of a very old, tired, bad riddle from kindergarten.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your house?

Time to buy a new house.

What time is it when your wife seeks to emasculate you by depriving you of a surgery that would (most likely) help you feel like a fully functional, restored man?

Time to find a new wife.

[dg_moore]

My wife was indifferent to the implant. She said if I wanted one I should get it, but not to think I was doing it for her. I went ahead and got my Titan in 2008, but as explained in my signature we never used it.

[Mark74]

In my experience most women would be against it. They prefer that the penis is something that responds to their touch and their body. If it becomes something mechanical it loses its magic.

Has there ever been a romance book where the male protagonist has a penile implant? Maybe..but I doubt it..

I know it is easier said than done, but I would get the implant for you and you alone (if you are sure you need it). .If your wife leaves you it will be bitter and painful, but you have already been abandoned by something far worse...your own body!

After dealing with that everything should feel easier in perspective

[Markc2008]

Man I feel for you. I’m not too far off from your situation. I know you have PFS and ofcourse since we talked you know I have pssd. We’re both in our 30s. I’m on the brink of looking harder at implants myself. My wife also is weird about it but I think if she knew more about it she might atleast let me get it for me. I’d try one more time to sit down and have a talk about how this will help you move on mentally and if she still can’t get past it... well..

[oldbeek]

They may be afraid of the operation because they don't understand how easy it is. Even though my dad had one, I had a vision of cutting my entire dick open to put one in and was against the idea. Once I watched a Kramer video it was like ,,, where do I sign up. My wife was also against it but I told her I am doing it for myself. She has some weird ideas and thinks it is gross. We had a great sex life up till the RP.

[newbie443]

I think there are 2 separate issues that are connected. The first is your ED. When it happened to me part of me was gone and I did not feel like a whole person. So when I did get this part of me back it made a great deal of difference in my whole life. I was single so I did not have another in my life for this. I did see a video of an advocate talking to a group that he did this for him as his wife has her own issues with sex as many do. So they were still married and sex was not enjoyable for her and so it was not used to have sex much at all but for him to be whole again. So you may consider explaining it to her that way. Kind of like breast reconstruction. Something was gone. So the person wants it back.

Second is your marriage. As I said above she may be having her own issues. Dryness making sex painful, loss of sex drive, ect. And a marriage of course is more than just sex. If you were like me and ED made me unhappy all the time this may help with your marriage. As far as women wanting to be the one that causes the erection I explain how that part is gone now. It is not that she is sexy or that I have lost my attraction to them. I still have that but before implant nothing worked. That I do find them very attractive and if I did want to have sex with them or was not turned on by them I would be somewhere else doing other things.

There is no way for you to get real evaluation with just a short statement from you on this board. You have way more information than can be put down in a post and the decision on both is yours to make. But some things to consider is talking to your wife and maybe even a clergyman or counselor if you want to try to save your marriage. But based on my own experience I would recommend you get the implant to get that part of your life back. As far as your marriage, I am not trained and do not have enough information if I were to advise you on that. So you can either make that choice on your own or talk to someone who has training in that area.

Take care friend and best of luck going forward with this.

[barrylandon]

I've been married to the same woman for almost 38 years and I'll be damned if I know what she's thinking, feeling or saying much of the time! I'm an intelligent, intuitive and attentive spouse so go figure. Following are comments she made whenever I brought up the subject of an implant...
"I don't want you to get it and I won't support you if you do"
"If you decide to do this (unspoken words, "against my wishes"!) it is for YOU, not for me"
"Things are fine the way they are"
"Do you not remember all of the surgeries you've had that left you worse off?" (Ah, she's right about that!)
"(You) having a hard cock is not important for me"

Once I made the decision to go forward with the implant surgery, she slowly become supportive and involved in the process...even going with me to my last two pre-surgical appointments. Although I had a rather difficult recovery period and I'm a bit of a wuss in the pain department, my wife was a real trooper through it all. As a registered nurse, she was especially helpful in managing my recovery from a medical perspective.

My wife remained non-committal toward the implant at the beginning of our using it but as I continued to heal and become more accustomed to my new bionic dick, it was almost like a switch had been thrown in her brain...she became enthusiastic and more turned on than I've seen her in years. In fact, after one of our recent lovemaking sessions, as we laid spent on the bed, she uttered these immortal words...THANK YOU, DR. MILLS (my implant surgeon)!!! Then came the night last week when she had multiple orgasms while in the "woman on top" position...something that hadn't happened in the past 20 years. That night, basking in her glow, she turned to me, kissed my cheek and said into my ear, "I'm glad you had the surgery!!!!" My wife is a woman...enough said!!???

[RayChez]

I agree that been able to get an erection makes a man feel complete or should I say it makes you feel like a man again.

Some women do act different after menopause, so I can see where they would not care whether you ever have sex again. But whether she wants to have sex or not you can still relieve yourself just like if you never suffered from ED.

I will say that for me it is very important in my life. My wife never did complain one way or the other. She said if it makes you feel better GO for it.

I never have regret it, I am glad that I done it.

[LookingUp]

So many posts that have my life in them. ED started with my 2nd wife. She was older than me and into menopause big time. I left to wife # 3 with a battle plan. Multiple pill dosage with a hot Nurse 11 years younger.... pills failed, no matter the dosage. Had to go to TriMix to stay hard, scaring and injection issues (hit the spot or not, hit the dose or not) and then... Menopause with #3. So, some of the posts here ring so true. I would throw out that on a Multiple wife number, it's more about Control from Her part. Sex becomes more of control than You don't find me attractive any more. She controls you by controlling sex.

I know... lots of guys in the perfect marriage. Good on you and many more years to ya. However, at some point... who owns the Dick? You do. It is part of you. To be used when you choose. Not to be serviced for services rendered.

Might sound a bit cold and Machismo. Do this for you. Do this to enjoy your sexual Maledom. Not to dominate, cause pain (physical/emotional) but just because you can enjoy you again.

Or.... "Sweetheart, I'll get Laid, I've seen me do it." Ron White, Blue Collar Comedy Tour.

Do it for you.

LUp