Wife is against me getting an implant

[Gt1956]

Just one old mans opinion. Some women are perfectly fine with the end of sex. The reason is mostly irrevelent. Once that happens, getting her back on board is pretty difficult if not impossible.
I've watched a couple of women that the lack of intimacy contributed to their divorce. Once single they seem to be interested again. I always wondered how long that lasted into the new marriage.
Don't get an implant thinking that it will all change. It might, good for you. But don't be shocked if it doesn't.

[tomas1]

From what I've read about this problem, I believe OP's wife no longer has any interest in sex. It makes me wonder about her prior interest in sex. I'm an old man, but my wife has always has a sex drive just short of mine. She had no problem with me taking pills, taking injections, and finally getting an implant. She's 80 now and still likes sex probably every other day, but I can convince her to do it more often. She's pretty much a "one trick pony", but not bad for an old woman.

[Gt1956]

Tomas1. Good for you. But it sounds like you never hit a willing dead spot. That your wife continued to support you speaks volumes.

[Mark74]

Many women can have an interest in sex and have problems reconciling with a biomechanical implant. While the implant guarantees hardness and penetration, it also guarantees destruction of the natural erectile response and that natural erectile response is very important to many women

[Lost Sheep]

Many women can have an interest in sex and have problems reconciling with a biomechanical implant. While the implant guarantees hardness and penetration, it also guarantees destruction of the natural erectile response and that natural erectile response is very important to many women

So then it falls to the husband to assure his wife of her desirability. That the need for artificial means of erection does not lessen his ardor for her. This can take many forms. For example, sending the wife to the easy chair in the living room while he does the dishes. Or helping with the dishes. Or just holding her around the waist while she does them and he kisses the back of her neck. Continue from there.

Men often do not recognize the importance of subtle signals.

Not that I am suggesting the OP is one of those men. Reading between the lines, I did not get that impression.

[Txagq8]

This topic keeps drawing me back. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I realize how many different factors and issues are involved.

I’ve been married nearly 35 years. To the same woman. The way we have managed that, since we are both strong willed and hard headed, has been to try and avoid being control freaks.

The focus doesn’t need to be on a guy feels better emotionally with an implant. Emotions are piss poor ways to make decisions. No, the focus needs to be function.

A lady with a sub-A cup bra holding her munchkin teats is still able to nurse her young. No need for a boob job or silicone beef up to get the job done. That’s why any analogy to breast implants is an instant fail.

I see the penile implant as akin to a dental implant or prosthetic limb. There are significant function and quality of life issues involved. Yeah, a guy can do without dental implants. He can eat puréed food or soup or fight dentures. He can forego dentures and gum everything. But dental implants will restore a person to having the closest thing to real teeth, only more durable and low maintenance. Sure they’re costly.....but they are the best replacement technology offers right now.

An amputee can sit in a wheelchair and have an exposed stump. They’re still living, albeit limited mobility wise. Or they can get fitted with a prosthetic leg and , after therapy and learning to use it, can get back to walking. The prosthesis restores them to a state closest to where they were before they lost a limb.

From this perspective, why would anyone choose not to be restored to as close to normal as medical science would allow? It doesn’t make sense to pass on the best you can afford which is proven to work. Even if the wife is frigid and NEVER engages in sex, a man ought to be allowed to hang on to as much normal function as his body, Bank account, and insurance carrier will allow.

Wife advises no. That’s fine. Her opinion has been noted. The bottom line is it’s not her decision. Husband needs to book appointments, set up the procedure, schedule it, and get it done. It is not within her realm to make those types of decisions, and certainly not a decision that impairs quality of life AND function.

If this were a husband with a 6” pecker getting some bogus experimental implant to make himself 9” long, then maybe she would have an argument to make. But that ain’t the deal here. Restoring the semblance of normal function conquers all.

[barrylandon]

After 40 years with my wife I think I know her pretty well. Although she doesn't voice it, I believe it makes her feel like "less of a desirable" woman if she's not able to get it up and get it off for me. Obviously, the implant has crushed her ability to get me hard and my anorgasmia since implantation 9 months ago has made it impossible for her to get me off. As a result, I think these factors have caused her to be less interested in sex except for the rare occasions when she wants a hard cock to achieve multiple orgasms in the WOT position.

[seeking info]

Txaq.... you are 100% Correct sir! I love your reply! Dead on the nail!!!!

Seeking info Aka Scott

[irishguy]

One other point I think is important.. depends on your level of Ed but I still get semi’s and she loves that, sometimes she says you don’t even need to pump it up.. and I always make sure she knows that’s because of her and how much I want to rip her clothes off!!

[Waynetho]

One other point I think is important.. depends on your level of Ed but I still get semi’s and she loves that, sometimes she says you don’t even need to pump it up.. and I always make sure she knows that’s because of her and how much I want to rip her clothes off!!

My wife and I just discussed this very thing last night. The fact that I still get a very hot chubby semi, albeit very soft and unusable for penetration, is very reaffirming to my wife that the magic is there. Before I penetrate I will have to pump up to almost full but the semi-erection along with the heat down the entire length (yes, even in the cavernosa), is sufficient for her knowing she did it.