Help, overthinking post-op

[confused95]

Be positive dude!
I might be getting an implant soon and I’m just 25 (almost 26 years old).
I still can masturbate and have super amazing erections (especially with 5mg Cialis), but I have a phobia for sex and erections, antidepressants haven’t helped and I want a family.

[aslanglobal]

I would personally you encourage to exhaust all psychological help before going this route. I wish I had. Don’t be me. There’s no going back from this. I have a machine in me for life and I’m in a ton of pain right now. This is very invasive last resort surgery. I should have kept searching for alternatives and you should definitely .

[aslanglobal]

Seriously - if you can still get morning wood, I wouldn’t go near this. I made the biggest mistake of my life.

[confused95]

Seriously - if you can still get morning wood, I wouldn’t go near this. I made the biggest mistake of my life.

You’re now saying so because you are feeling pain. Of course I’m trying to exhaust all the other possibilities first, but I do not really want to commit suicide and this problem is bringing me to that.
Antidepressants are not helping, nor talking therapy. I can hardly work and I feel very anxious. Maybe I’m just getting crazy and I’m also starting thinking that an implant would not help me because I would feel anxious and depressed the same even with an implant. But you know.. better having an implant than being dead. So before doing something stupid I’ll try also that route.

[aslanglobal]

Well of course an implant before that. And I understand that depression from persistent ED. But if you’re getting erections at night, there’s hope. Of course an implant is waiting if you need it and you can see most guys are happy with it. I may end up being in that 5% category. I can’t stand I did this to myself.

[confused95]

Yeah bro. I’m getting erections at night and when I’m calm I can masturbate, the erection is good. If I had another brain I would have 100% no problem in fucking a girl, as my dick is healthy.

[aslanglobal]

If you can get good erections while masturbating, My thoughts would be don’t go through this. I lost that ability years ago and I still regret it. I still got some nocturnal erections, of differing quality. I’m just cautioning you- this is not a pleasant surgery and if the problem is just in your head- you have a ton of hope.

[confused95]

If you can get good erections while masturbating, My thoughts would be don’t go through this. I lost that ability years ago and I still regret it. I still got some nocturnal erections, of differing quality. I’m just cautioning you- this is not a pleasant surgery and if the problem is just in your head- you have a ton of hope.

Thanks bro, this helps.
I bet you’ll be fine with your new toy and you’ll be able to start a family!

[stephen54]

I can’t stand I did this to myself.

Please...man, you have got to allow yourself some degree of kindness and some space to simply...heal...up...first. Your Thinking Mind has wrestled control of you.

It's not lost on me that, at the moment here, most of what most of us are saying to support you is simply words on a screen from people that truly don't know you. I get that what we are saying is probably really an abstraction at the moment. I get that you are in a dark place at present and it's difficult to really feel that other peoples' words can be a tonic to make you feel better. Of course. Been there. Not with implant, but I've been there plenty on other issues in my life where my Thinking Mind wouldn't shut the fuck up and give me the healthy space I really needed and very little of what others said made me feel better.

I think you just need to pick a mental spot on the horizon that looks better than current day, and you need to methodically row yourself toward that spot. I think you might benefit from some visualization techniques. Yes, I'm being entirely serious. There are some specific techniques which can be used to corral and sequester the mind which races and wrestles control of you. If you had an open mind to such a thing, DM me here on FT. I would happily suggest and share some material you might find of interest to read and to try out. Nothing to lose, and possibly some healthy mental territory to gain while your sac heals up and you start to cycle.

Sorry if some of that sounded a bit hippy trippy. There's a buddhist foundation to some of what I'm suggesting, and to the open minded, it actually can be transformational. It requires you to turn the mirror on yourself in a stark, honest, and different way. Kind of like...I've got good news and bad news...the good news is: the positive turn of your outlook here is entirely in your control. The bad news is: it's in your control. But there are specific techniques to (re)train your mind. Right now your mind is the lumbering out of control elephant with no rider. You've got to re-establish yourself as its rider/master.

DM me if you like. No worries if you don't. I won't preach or be weird, will just share a short reading list if you want.

Take good care of yourself.

[aslanglobal]

I’m obviously no doctor, so take my words as they are. As difficult as your ED is, you may very well find alternative solutions that can work for you for years. I haven’t had a natural, spontaneous erection to Jack with in at least 5 years. I hope you find solutions.

If you can get good erections while masturbating, My thoughts would be don’t go through this. I lost that ability years ago and I still regret it. I still got some nocturnal erections, of differing quality. I’m just cautioning you- this is not a pleasant surgery and if the problem is just in your head- you have a ton of hope.

Thanks bro, this helps.
I bet you’ll be fine with your new toy and you’ll be able to start a family!