WatNext wrote:Here's a lesson i've learnt in recent times as i've been forced into a temporary early retirement with illness at 44 y/o. Up until a few years ago my erections were rock solid, lasted for as long as i wanted and i had a very short refractory period. Id never even considered impotence as a possible life outcome. When it hit, i basically went from 100% - 0% overnight due to spinal nerve damage. I can see how gradual loss would be equally as distressing but man when its that quick, the mental decline was nothing short of severe.
I was never a big drinker (though when i did, lock up the bar!) but i turned very quickly to it during lockdown. High alcohol tolerance doesnt bode well for the wallet, mental health, or relationships. Once lock downs finished i started going to the local pub, something i never did.
What overwhelmed me very quickly was how many men were there doing the same thing. Drowning their sorrows, gambling, smoking like chimneys...real depressing shit. After talking to as many people i could the one resounding story was the relationship breakdowns they had with their gf/ wives. Didn't matter whether they were young or old, the story was the same. All of a sudden id gone from strong, fit, healthy, great sex life, great relationship with my wife to extremely depressed, overweight, sexless drunk. All i could think about when i looked around was whether through bad health, cancer, smoking or other illnesses, that these men were also experiencing some form of impotency. I learnt very fast that most blokes cringe whenever you talk about it (which is senseless toxic masculinity).
I never gave it a second thought until it happened to me. Unfortunately i can easily be driven down rabbit holes and i spent way too long on different parts of the internet looking for answers and what i found was reflected in what i was seeing. Impotency can literally drain the life out of men, and their partners. It can even lead to abuse and unfortunately self harm/ suicide.
Its absolutely astonishing when you think about it. Some malfunctioning nerves, or blood vessels can cause so much mental and physical grief. At 38 I lost my Rectum to Cancer. 1 year later i nearly died from a strangulated bowel. 18 months later my Spinal cord was crushed. Not trying to bring things down with a pity party but all that pain had absolutely nothing on becoming impotent.....not even close. To lose the ability to physically connect with my partner was THE worst pain i've ever experienced in my life so far. There will be those that will say that's a selfish way of viewing things...maybe. But sometimes you cant argue with 1000's of years of male evolution. Yes we can function without erections (and many men do), but at least for me it made me very depressed and emasculated.
The point i'm making is this. You can nit pick at all the failings an implant might have. All the pain we go through to get it done, the months of cycling, the indignity of the whole process let alone the stigma that one might place upon having one.
I believe that Implants can literally change and sometimes save a Mans life. And further to that, save relationships, careers, and have a positive impact on both mental and physical health.
Here's the part that the healthcare system i believe hasn't fully picked up on. Sexual health midas well be one of the most critical aspects of male health care. Penis health and Impotency treatment education should be mandatory throughout a mans life. Too many good men end up going down very dark paths as a result of this not being the case.
Sorry about the wall of text and i didn't mean to highjack it somewhat. I guess the happiness conveyed through this post really hit a raw nerve and i'm glad implants are being celebrated. Like many others on here it has taken me a long time to get used to having one, and while its not perfect, it literally saved my life.
Your very right about everything. I'm a vet and the VA recognizes ED as a quality of life issue. For years they have asked me, in nearly every appointment, "how's your sex life?" They continually offered me options. I'd take the options and generally brush them off because I already knew that nothing was working. I never tried shots as if seemed to extreme to stick myself just to have sex. Seemed counterintuitive. Then my doctor, a vet himself, told me he was implanted and offered up the option. I researched, and researched and researched. The more I researched, the more excited I became. In fact for months I felt like a kid the night before Christmas. I never realized how devastating my impotence was, how it was affecting me mentally until I was awake to the idea and the realization that this is much bigger than just an erection.