Excuses for medical leave

[Juerhareb]

Hello everyone,

I am already thinking about the possibility of getting the implant soon. I am 26 and have had this issue since I was 21, a lot of time wasted... After asking and reading many things I am almost convinced to go ahead.

However, I need an excuse to tell my bosses why I am going to be on medical leave around two weeks. I have thought of telling them I am going to have a hydrocele or varicocele surgery. It suits perfectly, as they can not ask me to show them my scar when I am back as, for example, with an hernia. Do you have any other alternativa?

I have to tell them something because, although I am not forced to It, I have a good relation with them, so it would be strange if I tell them nothing.

[Lost Sheep]

Hello everyone,

I am already thinking about the possibility of getting the implant soon. I am 26 and have had this issue since I was 21, a lot of time wasted... After asking and reading many things I am almost convinced to go ahead.

However, I need an excuse to tell my bosses why I am going to be on medical leave around two weeks. I have thought of telling them I am going to have a hydrocele or varicocele surgery. It suits perfectly, as they can not ask me to show them my scar when I am back as, for example, with an hernia. Do you have any other alternativa?

I have to tell them something because, although I am not forced to It, I have a good relation with them, so it would be strange if I tell them nothing.

While this question has been asked a number of times before (and you will get probably the same menu of answers, albeit more slowly than if you read the historical posts), I will offer one I have not seen before.

Ask your doctor what sort of surgery you could offer to your employer/co-workers as an explanation to camouflage your true surgery need.

Something with the same scar location, recovery time, etc.

P.S. Txagq8's reply is spot-on. You only have to tell your Human Resources department that you are having a medical need for leave (that is only if your company makes a difference between medical and ordinary leave). And HR is bound to secrecy. No need to be specific about what. You could say it is for removal of a cyst in your nose-or no information at all. How that amount of obfuscation affects your interpersonal/social relationships at work is, of course, another matter.

[Txagq8]

If all else fails, you can try truth.

Okay. I get it. At age 26 it’s a bit disconcerting to let folks know you’re needing an implant. At age 67 telling someone you’ve got a bionic dick and get laid multiple times a week is more like bragging.

But I think rather than a hernia, or a hydro eke, or varicocele….I would tell my bosses that I’m having a urological surgical procedure performed, they need not worry—nothing malignant going on—but you need to get it taken care of and leave it there.

Then they can think whatever they like. Torsion Testicle. Hydrocele. Varicocele. Kidney Stone, Resection for Benign Prostate Hyperplasia, Circumcision, any number of things. I think I’d be vague and general…people respect allowing other individuals a bit of space when it comes to their medical care needs.

In terms of recovery and where my incisions were, it was a lot like an uncomplicated inguinal hernia. So if you must get specific, that’s a pretty good lie. But why lie? Just be vague & nonspecific. “I’m having a minor (outpatient) urological surgery performed. Everything’s benign, no worries, recovery should be swift but I need to go ahead and get it done”

[newbie443]

I agree with the above. But the workforce is a whole different deal. It would be rare to not have at least one person that seems to need to know any secret. And I have seen great measures gone to for finding out specifics. They look at the general reply as an attempt to hide something and thus set on a quest to find out. Just be careful about phone calls at work. You know your fellow employees better than any of us. Just ask yourself if there are those you work with that really work at finding out information. Some of it for advancement and others for amusement.

[ThailandBound]

I work for a large corporation (whose health insurance did not cover the procedure btw). All i ever needed was my doctor (Dr. Clavell) to submit a form which indicated that i’d be undergoing surgery for a “medically necessary procedure”.

All i ever told my co-workers was that i had a “urological-related procedure”. Let them guess. Nobody ever pressed me on it, nor would i have told them since it’s nobody’s business but mine. If you get pressed on it by a co-worker for details, that’s just people being nosy. Stand up to that and refuse to comment further, even if they begin to speculate.

This was mentioned in another post above, and it worked for me.

[Bent Ben]

I literally told my manager “I broke my dick and have to get it fixed, I never thought my worst sports injury would be from sexual activity!”
He told me to submit the medical leave as medically necessary and leave it at that! Lol

[Old Guy]

Yes you'll get a variety of excuses here. Mine was a cyst on a testicle that needed removal. Any guy hearing that usually didn't ask for more details. Find a good doc and go for it if you have to. To be on the safe side I'd ask for about 4 weeks off work, especially if you do any heavy lifting. Best of luck.

[Juerhareb]

Yes you'll get a variety of excuses here. Mine was a cyst on a testicle that needed removal. Any guy hearing that usually didn't ask for more details. Find a good doc and go for it if you have to. To be on the safe side I'd ask for about 4 weeks off work, especially if you do any heavy lifting. Best of luck.

Thank you all for your help. I work in an office, just staying on the chair. I guess that in a pair of weeks I will be able to do It.

[MuscleDaddyRWC]

I’ve been advised to use “hernia” because it involves the general area and people will understand we shouldn’t lift heavy things for a month or so.

[JetAirliner]

I received my implant last week and told HR that I was taking PTO for a surgical procedure ... No need to get specific regarding the nature of the procedure