Hiding Trimix Use from the Wife

[hoping4it]

I am just newly remarried. My previous marriage ended because of my ED (Pills did not work) and Her getting a boyfriend. I met a wonderful lady a year ago and we abstained from intercourse until we decided if we going to make this permanent. We recently got married in March. We had oral until then, was great. But since we got married we did not consummated until 2 weeks ago. I found out about and started Trimix at that time and it changed my life. Have been rabbits ever since. She's a real naturalist and is against any medication use that is not absolutely required. (blood pressure meds etc.) When we were dating she made the comment that if I ever needed Viagra (not knowing about my problem) that she would rather go without sex than have me take those pills. (and made me promise that I would not take those pills) Now for the last 2 weeks we have had wild and crazy sex via penis injections, and she has no idea. I am very conflicted. I lost a marriage due to ED before and I love this girl to much to have that happen again. But I hate hiding the Trimix use. How do you tell someone? Its so hard. Being a diabetic she is use to seeing my kit in the bathroom. So its been easy to hide. But I know she will find out at some point. Anyone with experience with this?????

[newtoed]

Dear Friend,
All 3 ingredients of Trimix naturally occuring vasodilatators in our bodies as far as I know. We just don't have enough to function well. Just like you don't have enough insulin to keep your blood sugar down. This are more natural then the artificial active ingredients of ED pills. I'm single and sexually active and decided to never tell my sexual partners about my ED or Trimix. In my experience women gradually will respect you less and less in fresh relationship if they knew even if sex is good and they consciously want to stay with you. I lost my amazing wife partially to ED and ED treatment too. I personally won't take chances this time. It's your call though.
All the best!

[tomas1]

I'm really not qualified to give advice, but here goes:
I can't see that it would be a deal breaker if you told your wife.
I'd almost bet she suspects something.

I've known some naturalists that died young.
Just saying.

[fordman44]

Hmmmm....this is a catch 22 situation for sure. I mean if your Wife has had previous sex partners then she certainly understands that once a male ejaculates he is pretty much done and soft again for a while so if you are hanging in like you should be after ejaculation then surely she would be suspicious that "this just isn't normal" for a male.

Now, if she has never had a sexual partner before that raises another situation as you either have to continue to hide it or you will need to come clean at some point. In any event, if she is now familiar with the pleasure that a hard penis can give her I sorta doubt she would want you to give up the injections and never have vaginal sex again. Just my .02 cents worth.

[rahod1]

I am just newly remarried. My previous marriage ended because of my ED (Pills did not work) and Her getting a boyfriend. I met a wonderful lady a year ago and we abstained from intercourse until we decided if we going to make this permanent. We recently got married in March. We had oral until then, was great. But since we got married we did not consummated until 2 weeks ago. I found out about and started Trimix at that time and it changed my life. Have been rabbits ever since. She's a real naturalist and is against any medication use that is not absolutely required. (blood pressure meds etc.) When we were dating she made the comment that if I ever needed Viagra (not knowing about my problem) that she would rather go without sex than have me take those pills. (and made me promise that I would not take those pills) Now for the last 2 weeks we have had wild and crazy sex via penis injections, and she has no idea. I am very conflicted. I lost a marriage due to ED before and I love this girl to much to have that happen again. But I hate hiding the Trimix use. How do you tell someone? Its so hard. Being a diabetic she is use to seeing my kit in the bathroom. So its been easy to hide. But I know she will find out at some point. Anyone with experience with this?????

Wow....what a BUMMER! I normally advocate complete *disclosure*, since there's nothing inherently wrong with using medication to insure satisfactory sex. However in your case it is a problem, since the wife is dead set against medication for this. I simply can't understand why she would rather ABSTAIN, than have you use medication! You may want to make an analogy with your treatment of diabetes. If you can do that, then why not for ED? If I were in your situation I would keep it to myself. Having said this...I don't think you'll be able to so indefinitely. Let's hope by then she'll be accustomed to great sex and hesitant on going back to abstinence!

[Minalda]

Hey !

So … I know every situation is different and people are all very different too, it is difficult to judge and give a really good advice in any case but I will try to state my point of view in this type of situation.
I’m Hunchback’s wife, he has ED because he had a cancer when he was a baby and he got nerve damage and he is paraplegic … Anyway, not very interesting but I know what it’s like to live with someone with ED …

The most important thing in a relationship is trust and communication, I can’t stress that enough and this particular aspect is true for every relationship, I think.
I understand your problem here, I see that you are conflicted by this situation because you don’t want to lose your wife.
But, you have to consider some ineluctable facts and don’t do like a lot of people do and fail:
1. In a relationship you can’t hide something forever.
It’s impossible. As hard as you try to, even if you succeed for a long time, it won’t last forever. And more important of all : the more you wait to tell the truth / the longer she makes to find out, the more damage it will make.
2. In a relationship, you have to trust you partner completely.
It’s even truer when you have this type of problems. You shouldn’t have to stress even more, it is difficult enough as it is. Your partner should be the one you rest upon, the one to heal you from your internal wounds, the one to support you.
3. In a relationship you have to communicate / talk / share everything.
I don’t know what to say more, but it is true … It is the secret of every good, long term relationship I think.

Anyway, what I want to say is that:
I understand that you are afraid of the consequences of announcing to her that you use this type of medication.
But I think that you don’t ask the right question here.
The question isn’t:
Can you hide this from her?
The real question is:
When will she find out?
And more importantly:
Do you prefer to tell her at the start and maybe lose her?
Or
Do you prefer her to find out by herself in say 3 years tops and being even more angry and disappointed and lose her anyway?
If she loves you, she will support you.
If not, she is not worth it.
It’s my point of view.

I think that you should have told her before marrying her.

But anyway, I could be wrong, it is just what I think.

Reflect a lot about the pros and the cons and make your own decision.

--Minalda

[treetop]

Just my opinion here.... but

If she loves you, and if she cares about your feelings and what you want, then it is not a deal breaker.

If she values her 'no medication' rule more than your marriage, and more than your feelings ... then you need to think hard on that. It will affect other things in life if her feelings and believes override all of yours.

ED is so hard, we all know it. It can't even be described as far as humiliation and the feeling of worthlessness it can give a man. If a woman loves you, then it will be important to her for you to overcome it with any means possible.

One option... Tell her, stop injections and get an implant. Then no more injections needed.
Plus the possibility of injections causing damage at some point.

I have always told my partners, and they have always supported me. But I understand you are in another situation her believing the way she does.

I hope it all works out for you.
TT

[Cigar56]

Two things: I think you should come clean with it. Your love and trust for one another is more important than even sex. Second, I think you should consider an implant. Just my two cents. Good luck!

[dg_moore]

As has been stated above, attempts to keep this secret from your wife are not likely to end well. You need to come clean - the longer you wait the worse the consequences will be.

[ShopMan]

As has been stated above, attempts to keep this secret from your wife are not likely to end well. You need to come clean - the longer you wait the worse the consequences will be.

I too am in this camp. Your setting yourself up for a great downfall I am sure.
I might add, why didn't this come up before your married her. You may have lost her then but would it be any worse then the risk of loosing her later and maybe more.

This is all just my opinion. Having never been in your situation I certainly am not expert.

I wish you all the luck in the world. Plus, consider the implant. You will never regret it.

Charlie