Question or Survey

[Tybeeman]

So I am 11 days out from surgery and my wife and I are having a discussion. We both have big family's that live local. Do we tell them about the implant or do we just tell them I had surgery down there to fix something.

How many of you guys don't care and tell everyone you got an implant?

It really doesn't bother me, I would tell everyone. But I can tell you there will be a whole lot of jokes going on in front of us about it.

[DonBecker54]

My best friend and two of my brothers know (the rest of my immediately family is gone). For other family members or for neighbors, if there's any question about the surgery I had, I just say it's male surgery and kinda personal. I think that leaves the thought that it could be gross and the conversation goes no further.

[Donnie1954]

I've told a few men that I work with. My immediate family and my wife's family knows. I will gladly do a ,'show and tell'(done one already,) but there is no sign in my yard and I haven't posted it on Facebook. At least I don't think I have.
Donnie

[Bigred]

Only my wife at this time. No need for the inlaws to know my business.

[DaveET1]

I think it's none of anybody's business, and I'm sure I would get a lot of teasing if they knew. There are also lots of people who know much more medicine than the stupid doctor who doesn't know anything, but still managed to do my fantastic surgery. I just don't feel like hearing the pontifications from all those wise people trying to overrule Dr. Caesar and help by telling me what I should have done.

I told them I had some "very personal" surgery. There were a few dummies who couldn't let it lay there, and had to know what it was. Them, I told to forget it, they didn't need to know. Then, there were a couple of them who thought they needed to make a guessing game out of it. Them, I told to just "butt out."

[ThePlumber1964]

I think that the decision is very personal. I do not feel that I need to broadcast it, but I am not ashamed of it. It is a chronic medical condition, just as any other.

I am 52 (well, on Sunday I will be 53), and I feel blessed with a family that we are our best support network for each other. When I say family, I include my wife immediate family, too.

So, before underdoing the first surgery, I told my 3 kids (28, 25 and 23), and openly discussed it with my parents, my siblings (including my wife siblings). Also, I told it to my best friend and his wife, which is also one of our dear best friends.

But, again, I do not need to broadcast it to anyone that is not part of my support network. We need to continue to bring down the stigma of ED. I think that by sharing it with the people that I choose, specially my 2 male kids and brothers, I made them aware of the early signs, and gave them a space and platform to feel safe to discuss it with me if they feel they want to, in the event that they are experiencing any kind of early signs.

ThePlumber

[David_R]

I told anyone who was curious that I had had "urological surgery," and no one wanted to know any details.
So that was all I had to say to them.

[ThePlumber1964]

I told anyone who was curious that I had had "urological surgery," and no one wanted to know any details.
So that was all I had to say to them.

That is more or less the approach I follow to cut the curiosity out of the people which I do not feel I have or want to share with the details.

[hard drive]

My wife, my mother & my father. I'm a private person and feel it's no one else's business where friends, neighbors, siblings or co-workers are involved.

[TANGERINE]

For me, the only people that should know about an implant would be the people you are having sex with. No body else. There is a stigma to "not being able to get-it-up" and there is a stigma to "he has a fake erection." This would feed into gossip circles, it would feed into people judging you, and it would feed into schadenfreude.

Details about your sex life really have no place at the family dinner table, and especially at the thanksgiving table where the in-laws, cousins, and eccentric relatives can feast on your juicy piece of gossip.

The only person that knew about my implant surgery was my wife; in fact, that was one of the reasons that traveling to New York was attractive -- it meant that nobody would be able to figure out that I was postop during the difficult first three days of bedrest.