Fellow Members with Lifelong Impotence

[Genesis]

Dear Genesis I can relate so much to what you have been saying, I will reply to your post but I will have to think about it as I don't want to write a ten page letter with the story of my life and bore every one to tears.

I still hope to hear your story soon.

Hello Genesis,

My story is very similar to yours. I am 37 and have suffered ED all my life. I need to take the time to go through it in detail to post it. I am happy to find somebody my age in a similar situation because it feels very lonely.
Let me know if you have any questions and I will be happy to answer

Thanks for making the effort to reach out Jmontesco.
It's such a relief to know I am not alone and I greatly look forward to hearing your story.
If you're open to it, I would like to start a dialog with you. I've only spoke with one other guy going through the same thing.

How could you stand so many years like this?

It's been hell.

The confusion of whether my impotence was psychological or physical in nature.

Urologist telling me flat out it was in my head and that I was much too young to even consider an implant. These are the experts remember.

Holding out hope my impotence would be cured by a new technique without having to resort to the implant.

The biggest factor was not having discovered a place such as FrankTalk with actual men going through and sharing their experiences at every stage of ED

[dg_moore]

with this you dont learn to live when you are young, you die in life .. if it werent for there the possibility of an implant I would possibly be dead

I've had an implant for nearly 10 years, but my sex life was not restored. Like I said, some things you just have to learn to live with.

Yes but you are 74 yo now (64 on surgery,s date), dont misunderstand me, sure it is hard in any age, but in your 20s 30s its not only hard its almost impossible, for me its worse than death with this age

Long before this, when I was in my 40's, my late wife fought cancer for years, during which time there was no sex. As I said above, you learn to live with whatever life has handed you. You just play the hand you're dealt.

[jelquinginjury]

How could you stand so many years like this?

It's been hell.

The confusion of whether my impotence was psychological or physical in nature.

Urologist telling me flat out it was in my head and that I was much too young to even consider an implant. These are the experts remember.

This. Me the same.
Over time you realize that urologists have no idea and when they see that you are young the first thing they say is that it is psychological wtf! ED is almost never psychological, that is an excuse to not have to study your case because as you are young .. Most urologists are pathetic

[Larry10625]

How could you stand so many years like this?

It's been hell.

The confusion of whether my impotence was psychological or physical in nature.

Urologist telling me flat out it was in my head and that I was much too young to even consider an implant. These are the experts remember.

This. Me the same.
Over time you realize that urologists have no idea and when they see that you are young the first thing they say is that it is psychological wtf! ED is almost never psychological, that is an excuse to not have to study your case because as you are young .. Most urologists are pathetic

Please create a signature. It makes things much easier to answer your questions without asking a lot of questions. Here's how you do it
Click on your name in the top right corner and select "user control panel"

Then under the big letters "User Control Panel" there is a row of words... select "Profile"

Then down the left had side of the "User Control Panel" select "Edit Signature" (You might have Create Signature or something. I don't know exactly what you'll get because I already have a signature to edit)

Most guys put something like what I have, but you can put whatever you want. Here is mine -
"AMS 700 (18 + 2 rte's). Implanted March 30, 2017 by Dr. Brock of London, Ont, CANADA. Great surgeon. Went in to septic shock and had to have implant removed April 29, 2017. I'm from Belleville, Ontario, CANADA. Appt. for consult for second attempt is on November 6, 2017... I can't wait."

Don't get too carried away with the doctor like his name, address, phone number, etc (anything that looks like advertising for him).. you can certainly say Dr. Jones (great Dr.)

If you need further help, please ask, that's what I'm here for.

Larry
Moderator

[jelquinginjury]

I've had an implant for nearly 10 years, but my sex life was not restored. Like I said, some things you just have to learn to live with.

Yes but you are 74 yo now (64 on surgery,s date), dont misunderstand me, sure it is hard in any age, but in your 20s 30s its not only hard its almost impossible, for me its worse than death with this age

Long before this, when I was in my 40's, my late wife fought cancer for years, during which time there was no sex. As I said above, you learn to live with whatever life has handed you. You just play the hand you're dealt.

But it isnt the same, you hadnt ED true? In your message before editing, you could still have sex and thats why when you remarried you could do sex again, without concerns about ED, yo didnt worry about ED. So it isnt the same, because psychologically its destructive to know that you have ED, it is no longer to have sex, its to know that if the opportunity arrives you wont be able to, so it isnt comparable what you put in your message because you hadnt ED until idk maybe 60 yo?

 

[dg_moore]

My point isn't about who has suffered how much, or when, but rather that it is possible to learn to live with whatever comes your way.

[williamb]

jelquinginjury , I don't have a dog in this fight but I have Just a little advice based on some of my experiences that I have caused myself. Listen to what DG_Moore is telling you because you have never been 74 yr old but he has been 30 something and has more experience at life. He didn't get to be 74 yr old by being stupid so learn what you can from older people's trials and tribulations.

[geophd]

jelquinginjury , I don't have a dog in this fight but I have Just a little advice based on some of my experiences that I have caused myself. Listen to what DG_Moore is telling you because you have never been 74 yr old but he has been 30 something and has more experience at life. He didn't get to be 74 yr old by being stupid so learn what you can from older people's trials and tribulations.

I think what jelquing is saying is that why learn to live with something that can be fixed? People learn to live with a lot of things that can be fixed, that's not always admirable... that's ignorant. You could learn to live with being overweight... or you could exercise and lose weight. You could learn to live with complete impotence... or you could get an implant.

What Jelquing is saying is that if you're young it seems radical to have complete impotence and not pursue the only solution available. I agree, wish every man with severe ED would solve their problem instead of "learning to live with it"... learning to live with it with certainly develop poor social habits... as dg_moore has mentioned before in his posts.

Don't learn to live with ED, solve the ED.

[Larry10625]

jelquinginjury , I don't have a dog in this fight but I have Just a little advice based on some of my experiences that I have caused myself. Listen to what DG_Moore is telling you because you have never been 74 yr old but he has been 30 something and has more experience at life. He didn't get to be 74 yr old by being stupid so learn what you can from older people's trials and tribulations.

I think what jelquing is saying is that why learn to live with something that can be fixed? People learn to live with a lot of things that can be fixed, that's not always admirable... that's ignorant. You could learn to live with being overweight... or you could exercise and lose weight. You could learn to live with complete impotence... or you could get an implant.

What Jelquing is saying is that if you're young it seems radical to have complete impotence and not pursue the only solution available. I agree, wish every man with severe ED would solve their problem instead of "learning to live with it"... learning to live with it with certainly develop poor social habits... as dg_moore has mentioned before in his posts.

Don't learn to live with ED, solve the ED.

I tend to agree with you except, I would caution our younger members to ensure they try all other options first because, implants are like everything... eventually they wear out. If you are lucky yours will last 20 plus years, but what if it doesn't? If it's you only choice, I agree with geophd but, if you have yet to try other things, I suggest you speak to your doctor and consider other things first. That will give you time to save up for your bionic dick.

Larry

[Jamesmj]

I agree with you Larry, I think it is wise to try all other available options before you go for the implant.

In my case, and answering to how I managed to cope with this condition, at least for me it is not like I have been sitting waiting for a cure all these years.
I have seen 20 or more urologist, plus psycotherapy with different professionals. As some of you have said, when most Urologist see that you are young, they will automatically put you in the psycological problem "box" and will not help you at all.

Unfortunately for many of us, there are no real tests to meassure which part is organic and which part is your brain playing tricks on your dick. Tests in my case have always resulted in something compatible with venous leak but then again some urologist say that leak is not really a thing... So years pass by while you try to understand why this is happening to you and how you can fix it without getting into surgery.

For me pills don't do the trick, neither injections at the doctor's office. And even with these results, they will send me back to the psycologist for him/her to "cure" me.

Now I am reaching the point where frustration and depresion gets at me so bad that I think the implant would possibly be the only real solution. Reading through posts in FrankTalk and seeing that there are many of us in the same situation makes feel less alone and gives me the courage and the trust to believe that I am following the right path.