I just give up.

[LeRoastBeef]

If you start using a VED then you will regain size over time.
You can then go for an implant, which will then regain you some size too, you may even end up bigger than you originally were. Most guys don't lose anything like the size you speculate.
Go and see a urologist, take control and do something to get out of it. Depression is a motivation killer i know, but the fact is you must be assertive and brave to get better. There is no reason in your history that you can't regain size, get implanted and have a decent size again.

[Lost Sheep]

I already hurt my friends and family and have driven away most of them with my negativity. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I also don't want to be in constant fucking pain all the time.

True friends will come back. Pretty much the same thing for family. They hurt when you hurt and that is a lot of why people feel alienated and withdraw. When they see hope, they are happy and energized.

there's nothing any therapist can do to fix my small and broken penis. it's just over.

I can attest that even a broken penis can be pleasurable. And a working penis is not necessary for a joyful (and sexual) relationship. All relationships take work.

A penis is not a magic wand that solves all problems, so, when you think about it, is not an essential element. It helps. It helps a lot. But even a perfect penis is not enough to make a relationship and a lack of function in one is not a barrier.

Figure out a path to success. Work a plan to get there. MANY have done it before and you can, too. The hardest part is figuring out what to do first and un-paralyzing yourself.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." (Yeah, I don't like platitudes, either. But the have their applicable moments.)