Wife's lost interest, but still jealous.

[ready2go]

I’m getting divorced at 58 after 20 years of marriage, for similar reasons. We still get along great and are friends with no hard feelings, and she’s even taken time off work to help me recover from my IPP surgery next month.

But she has essentially no libido or interest in me physically, which caused me to withdraw emotionally and make her unhappy too. Even at my age it’s better to be alone than live in that circumstance, and she would NOT be okay with me getting affection elsewhere.

It’s painful and difficult, but do yourself a favor and make it clear to her that things MUST change or you will head to greener pastures. Life is far too short to be miserable with the one person who’s supposed to have your back and make you feel like a man.

hey elbow , i wrote e reply to your post but it didn't go through . but yeah . ill give her chance to seek help . i have told her i do not need a wife who has turned into a roommate ,and that she seemed happy with that .
she says she is not ,and is looking for a obgyn . so ill see how it goes .

[ready2go]

Yes, as CanGetIt says, my wife uses estradiol and it works perfectly. But she had to go to different gynecologists before finding the right doctor; there are several HRTs. Apparently every woman's biology is different and HRT requires experimentation.

So, ready2go, she might have to stay in the states for some time. Encourage her to keep trying different gynecologists or endocrinologists - use my 80-year-old wife who screws as if she were 25, as an example of what can be accomplished with perseverance in finding the right doctor.

I wouldn't give her half the Androgel you use, that's much too much for females. I believe acne would be a first sign that a woman is taking too much synthetic testosterone. My wife does not need extra testosterone.

wow ,80 and going at it hard ! That is amazing . ill send her clips from the replies you guys posted to give her an idea of what to expect . all of your replies are very helpful and informative . thanks to all who replied .

[SWorks17]

Hello guys , i am in the same situation as you here .
my wife a few months ago said she didn't want sex as it 'hurt" , suddenly .
she is 59 but went into menopause years ago .
so after reading posts here , i told her to have her blood checked and ask for hormone replacement therapy .
so first while in the philippines , she did that .[ turns out she is borderline diabetic ], but they only gave her what amounts as a herb supplement to treat menopause symptoms. no HRT . so she took a trip to usa to visit family and went to a clinic there.
They said . NO! , HRT is risky !
wth!? did your wives go through this trying to be treated ? risky? living with a dried up painful vagina is not worth trying available proven meds to resolve the issue and have a normal life again ?
what is our next move ? of course, trying to find a reasonable doctor . but if the guys here who had their wife go through with the HRT successfully ,could share how their experience was to obtain the proper meds went , that would be helpful .
Thanks .

Ready, I had a FrankTalk friend in Dallas, Texas who told me about his wife's big change after she started HRT, Testosterone and Progesterone cream, they are both in their late 60's and early 70's and it really got her engine started, wanting sex a lot.
I told my wife about her experience and that it is safe and she went to a clinic that I checked out that had good reviews. My wife went through all their checks and lab work and they gave her the creams also, which they want you to put on at different places on your inner thighs. She did it for 3 months and nothing!
My wife was walking a lot in the morning at that time and we found out that you can't sweat or take showers too soon after application.
My wife didn't like that clinic, so she went to a Neighborhood Wellness clinic that she had been to before for some minor weight loss.
They had to check her again for all her hormone levels and she was real low on testosterone, progesterone and thyroid.
This time she decided to go with the pellet that they put inside your back thigh buttocks area. It last for 3 to 4 months also and you don't have to do anything.
It didn't take long for it before it started working and my wife got hornier and she would get super wet. At the beginning of the pellet install after it is time for another one, she wants sex more.
I've never had a sexless marriage but we have more sex now that she has started HRT than when we were a young married couple.
I think that the only thing the pellet has is testosterone and she has to take progesterone and the thyroid pills.
They check her levels every 8 months to make sure she isn't getting too much.
The clinic has a Physicians assistant who is under a doctor for all their offices around our area. No OBG or Urologist
I use to have to use lube for sex, but now I don't at all, but when the pellet starts waining, it takes a little more time to get her warmed up with foreplay.
Ready, the pellets are the best, you don't have to go to a fancy clinic, try to find one by word of mouth, or one that uses the pellet method.
It really has been a game changer with our sex life, besides getting my On Demand Bionic Dick!

We live north of San Antonio, Texas and her clinic is only 6 miles from our house.

Good Luck Ready,
I hope she can get some help,
SWorks

[ElbowRoom]

hey elbow , i wrote e reply to your post but it didn't go through . but yeah . ill give her chance to seek help . i have told her i do not need a wife who has turned into a roommate ,and that she seemed happy with that .
she says she is not ,and is looking for a obgyn . so ill see how it goes .

Best of luck, I hope your situation resolves better than mine did.

[ready2go]

Hello guys , i am in the same situation as you here .
my wife a few months ago said she didn't want sex as it 'hurt" , suddenly .
she is 59 but went into menopause years ago .
so after reading posts here , i told her to have her blood checked and ask for hormone replacement therapy .
so first while in the philippines , she did that .[ turns out she is borderline diabetic ], but they only gave her what amounts as a herb supplement to treat menopause symptoms. no HRT . so she took a trip to usa to visit family and went to a clinic there.
They said . NO! , HRT is risky !
wth!? did your wives go through this trying to be treated ? risky? living with a dried up painful vagina is not worth trying available proven meds to resolve the issue and have a normal life again ?
what is our next move ? of course, trying to find a reasonable doctor . but if the guys here who had their wife go through with the HRT successfully ,could share how their experience was to obtain the proper meds went , that would be helpful .
Thanks .

Ready, I had a FrankTalk friend in Dallas, Texas who told me about his wife's big change after she started HRT, Testosterone and Progesterone cream, they are both in their late 60's and early 70's and it really got her engine started, wanting sex a lot.
I told my wife about her experience and that it is safe and she went to a clinic that I checked out that had good reviews. My wife went through all their checks and lab work and they gave her the creams also, which they want you to put on at different places on your inner thighs. She did it for 3 months and nothing!
My wife was walking a lot in the morning at that time and we found out that you can't sweat or take showers too soon after application.
My wife didn't like that clinic, so she went to a Neighborhood Wellness clinic that she had been to before for some minor weight loss.
They had to check her again for all her hormone levels and she was real low on testosterone, progesterone and thyroid.
This time she decided to go with the pellet that they put inside your back thigh buttocks area. It last for 3 to 4 months also and you don't have to do anything.
It didn't take long for it before it started working and my wife got hornier and she would get super wet. At the beginning of the pellet install after it is time for another one, she wants sex more.
I've never had a sexless marriage but we have more sex now that she has started HRT than when we were a young married couple.
I think that the only thing the pellet has is testosterone and she has to take progesterone and the thyroid pills.
They check her levels every 8 months to make sure she isn't getting too much.
The clinic has a Physicians assistant who is under a doctor for all their offices around our area. No OBG or Urologist
I use to have to use lube for sex, but now I don't at all, but when the pellet starts waining, it takes a little more time to get her warmed up with foreplay.
Ready, the pellets are the best, you don't have to go to a fancy clinic, try to find one by word of mouth, or one that uses the pellet method.
It really has been a game changer with our sex life, besides getting my On Demand Bionic Dick!

We live north of San Antonio, Texas and her clinic is only 6 miles from our house.

Good Luck Ready,
I hope she can get some help,
SWorks

good to know ,thanks . ill send her a pic of your reply as well. "urgent care "clinics . i have used those more than once, and they are hassle free . not over priced and well staffed [good attitudes ] and knowledgeable i forgot about those

[CanGetItUpButNotOff]

I have to jump in, re "urgent care". SWorks can correct me, but I don't think he was talking about the ubiquitous corner urgent care type clinic. He used the term "wellness clinic" which I believe is a more specialized practice that might use a term like "functional medicine". I think your chances are nil of finding hormone knowledge at an urgent care; a wellness clinic will be a little harder to find and will require a some detective work with probing questions.

[SWorks17]

Hello guys , i am in the same situation as you here .
my wife a few months ago said she didn't want sex as it 'hurt" , suddenly .
she is 59 but went into menopause years ago .
so after reading posts here , i told her to have her blood checked and ask for hormone replacement therapy .
so first while in the philippines , she did that .[ turns out she is borderline diabetic ], but they only gave her what amounts as a herb supplement to treat menopause symptoms. no HRT . so she took a trip to usa to visit family and went to a clinic there.
They said . NO! , HRT is risky !
wth!? did your wives go through this trying to be treated ? risky? living with a dried up painful vagina is not worth trying available proven meds to resolve the issue and have a normal life again ?
what is our next move ? of course, trying to find a reasonable doctor . but if the guys here who had their wife go through with the HRT successfully ,could share how their experience was to obtain the proper meds went , that would be helpful .
Thanks .

Ready, I had a FrankTalk friend in Dallas, Texas who told me about his wife's big change after she started HRT, Testosterone and Progesterone cream, they are both in their late 60's and early 70's and it really got her engine started, wanting sex a lot.
I told my wife about her experience and that it is safe and she went to a clinic that I checked out that had good reviews. My wife went through all their checks and lab work and they gave her the creams also, which they want you to put on at different places on your inner thighs. She did it for 3 months and nothing!
My wife was walking a lot in the morning at that time and we found out that you can't sweat or take showers too soon after application.
My wife didn't like that clinic, so she went to a Neighborhood Wellness clinic that she had been to before for some minor weight loss.
They had to check her again for all her hormone levels and she was real low on testosterone, progesterone and thyroid.
This time she decided to go with the pellet that they put inside your back thigh buttocks area. It last for 3 to 4 months also and you don't have to do anything.
It didn't take long for it before it started working and my wife got hornier and she would get super wet. At the beginning of the pellet install after it is time for another one, she wants sex more.
I've never had a sexless marriage but we have more sex now that she has started HRT than when we were a young married couple.
I think that the only thing the pellet has is testosterone and she has to take progesterone and the thyroid pills.
They check her levels every 8 months to make sure she isn't getting too much.
The clinic has a Physicians assistant who is under a doctor for all their offices around our area. No OBG or Urologist
I use to have to use lube for sex, but now I don't at all, but when the pellet starts waining, it takes a little more time to get her warmed up with foreplay.
Ready, the pellets are the best, you don't have to go to a fancy clinic, try to find one by word of mouth, or one that uses the pellet method.
It really has been a game changer with our sex life, besides getting my On Demand Bionic Dick!

We live north of San Antonio, Texas and her clinic is only 6 miles from our house.

Good Luck Ready,
I hope she can get some help,
SWorks

good to know ,thanks . ill send her a pic of your reply as well. "urgent care "clinics . i have used those more than once, and they are hassle free . not over priced and well staffed [good attitudes ] and knowledgeable i forgot about those

Ready, not urgent care clinics! they are not equipped or have the knowledge about hormone therapy.
There are clinics in our local area that focus on women’s health and men’s health too. Some are good and some are not. A urgent care facility will not do HRT or put pellets in a patient.
See if you can find some clinics in your area that focus on women’s health.

SWorks

[SWorks17]

The wife has had increasing pain during sex, and doesn't really want it anymore.
However, she's still very jealous if I even talk to another woman, and expects me to be celibate too.

I'm just NOT ok with that.

I do love her, and we get along well on most other subjects.
I've seen a few girls without her knowledge, but I don't want to get caught and hurt her, or risk a breakup, which could be devastating to us both.

I did bring up the possibility after our last failed attempt at sex.
She was not comfortable with it, and after some discussion, she seems very concerned about me falling in love with someone else. I tried to explain to her that I was only looking for physical sex, and I'd make that clear to anyone I meet, but she still wasn't convinced.

Has anyone else had a similar situation?
Was your wife ever able to understand and accept your need for sexual satisfaction?
How did you convince her to accept that, and understand that it could be key to saving your marriage?

Thanks, I hope someone here can help, it's getting really difficult lately.

BigDave, I had a FrankTalk friend in Dallas, Texas who told me about his wife's big change after she started HRT, Testosterone and Progesterone cream, they are both in their late 60's and early 70's and it really got her engine started, wanting sex a lot.
I told my wife about her experience and that it is safe and she went to a clinic that I checked out that had good reviews. My wife went through all their checks and lab work and her numbers were low and they gave her the creams like our friends in Dallas, which they want you to put on at different places on your inner thighs. She did it for 3 months and nothing!
My wife was walking a lot in the morning at that time and we found out that you can't sweat or take showers too soon after application, or it will cancel out the hormones penetrating your skin.

My wife didn't like that clinic, so she went to a Neighborhood Wellness clinic that she had been to before for some minor weight loss, who also does all women's health.
They had to check her again for all her hormone levels and she was real low on testosterone, progesterone and thyroid.

This time she decided to go with the pellet that they put inside your back thigh buttocks area. It last for 3 to 4 months also and you don't have to do anything.
It didn't take long before it started working and my wife got hornier and she would get super wet when I would start foreplay or passionate kissing.
I've never had a sexless marriage but we have more sex now that she has started HRT than when we were a young married couple.
I think that the only thing the pellet has is testosterone and she has to take progesterone and the thyroid pills.
They check her levels every 8 months to make sure she isn't getting too much.
The clinic has a Physicians assistant who is under a doctor for all their offices around our area. No OBG or Urologist
I use to have to use lube for sex, but now I don't at all, but when the pellet starts waining, it takes a little more time to get her warmed up with foreplay.
BigDave, the pellets are the best for my wife, you don't have to go to a fancy clinic, try to find one by word of mouth, or one that uses the pellet method.
It really has been a game changer with our sex life, besides getting my On Demand Bionic Dick!

We live north of San Antonio, Texas and her clinic is only 6 miles from our house.

Good Luck BigDave,
I hope she can get some help,
SWorks