Two month update - advice/comments?

[8smoth]

I have recently had an implant in Miami with Dr. Perito. Great guy and good surgeon. I am about two months out and I recovered quickly. Back to all activities quickly. Only took Motrin for pain relief. From a surgical standpoint I could not have wanted a better recovery.

Results wise I am having some struggle however. I am 67 and 14 years post prostatectomy and salvage XRT. It took me a year after my prostatectomy to recover from ED and I did ok with pills for years until 2020. Then the XRT I believe did the deed and by 2021-22 I have TOTAL ED. Pills, shots ...NADA. I got very frustrated and depressed. Having the ability to have sex again is really a treat. But I have some issues:

Sensitivity is down and I was having trouble with orgasm. Last night was the first time I was able to orgasm PIV. I think I am recovering there but the issue is my wife. She was never wild sexually but we did OK in the past. One thing she had was the ability to have an orgasm in 30-60 seconds ...very easily orgasmic. But the long lay off has take its toll. She cannot get at all excited now. We have had sex 5-6 times and she has not had orgasm. She doesn't like oral or toys ...PIV has always worked. She is willing to go along for the ride so to speak but I can see that her interest is limited due to frustration. Not sure what I can do. I feel like I am now recovering but it may be all for not.

Part of the problem might be size. I was probably around 6" in the past but lost sized with ED. Perito was shooting for a 20cm Titan but when I check my card it says I got an 18cm. I am about 5 inches now - maybe 5 1/4 after cycling for two months. My girth is not great. I think she just doesn't get off for a combination of factors. After such a long lay off I was hoping it would recharge us but I think I waited too long for the implant. I love my wife so looking outside the marriage is out. I am hoping that she will recharge ...any advice or thoughts would be appreciated. BTW, she is 66 but in really good shape physically.

[John Dday]

Thanks for posting.
It is so important that our partner also enjoy the new found interest that an implant can bring to a relationship. At our age it is harder than many realise. Women have as many problems with their ‘parts’ as us men.
Reddit forums can help educate and show us that this is normal. Having blood tests and learning how to read them is also very important.
.Finding a good experienced doctor is more of a challenge that us men
FT almost need a section for women.
Message me if you want.

[8smoth]

John, thanks for responding. Yes, this is a website ultimately dedicated to"erections" but when and how to use those erections gets a littel complicated. Moreso as we get older. But even us older guys are not ready to give up so that is why we are here. Personally I am still quite active playing tennis, working out, and trying to stay positive so I am trying to make everything work to its best so to speak

Good luck with the prostate issue. I hope that you had a chance to look at ALL options including surveillance. I regret jumping right to RP since I needed XRT anyways and the double whammy led to my ED for sure. BTW don't minimize the stress of RP surgery in a 70-75 year old. Also, incontinence can be very frustrating - though in my case it was temporary it drove me nuts.

[LGXDownunder]

8smoth, sorry to read about your difficulties. Yes it's not ideal when you are finally at a good place physically but still facing challenges sexually.
As another older guy who has been down the PC/prostatectomy/ED/incontinence/implant route I can relate to much of this.
Thankfully also finally on the other side of all of that after about 6 years.

My message is don't give up. While I had ED both my wife and I were more or less just going through the motions during sex, as no conservative solution was satisfactory. Post implant that has turned around dramatically, but it took time and persistence. She has a lower libido than me, not an unusual situation for many women. But once I fully recovered and was able to perform way beyond what I could do before ED, she has become a more than willing sex partner. She will even initiate sex herself at times and can often be the dominant partner.

Our biggest issue is that she has chronic back problems. She is extremely limited in what positions are comfortable for PIV, and how long she can keep going. I can stay erect indefinitely with my implant and I prefer very long lasting sex, but have to be mindful of her comfort. Fortunately I've returned to pretty much full sensation. I climax 100% of the time and have good control over when I orgasm. If I sense that it's getting too much for her I can finish quickly if necessary. She also doesn't climax from PIV these days. Still enjoys it and often I can almost get her there, just not over the brink. Fortunately she does cum with toys and I always make sure that happens more than once before PIV.

You are still early in your recovery. It took months for both my discomfort to settle down and for my sexual confidence to return. My wife was very supportive during that period and I made sure to communicate what was going on with me. Initially sex was painful and I couldn't orgasm. That slowly improved, I saw my pre ED size eventually return and my confidence went through the roof. That's when it became obvious that my wife was enjoying sex again. Give it time and keep talking to each other to find what works.

p.s. In hindsight I also would have explored other treatments before committing to an RP.
RP may well have saved my life but the side effects have been nothing short of diabolical.

[SWorks17]

I have recently had an implant in Miami with Dr. Perito. Great guy and good surgeon. I am about two months out and I recovered quickly. Back to all activities quickly. Only took Motrin for pain relief. From a surgical standpoint I could not have wanted a better recovery.

Results wise I am having some struggle however. I am 67 and 14 years post prostatectomy and salvage XRT. It took me a year after my prostatectomy to recover from ED and I did ok with pills for years until 2020. Then the XRT I believe did the deed and by 2021-22 I have TOTAL ED. Pills, shots ...NADA. I got very frustrated and depressed. Having the ability to have sex again is really a treat. But I have some issues:

Sensitivity is down and I was having trouble with orgasm. Last night was the first time I was able to orgasm PIV. I think I am recovering there but the issue is my wife. She was never wild sexually but we did OK in the past. One thing she had was the ability to have an orgasm in 30-60 seconds ...very easily orgasmic. But the long lay off has take its toll. She cannot get at all excited now. We have had sex 5-6 times and she has not had orgasm. She doesn't like oral or toys ...PIV has always worked. She is willing to go along for the ride so to speak but I can see that her interest is limited due to frustration. Not sure what I can do. I feel like I am now recovering but it may be all for not.

Part of the problem might be size. I was probably around 6" in the past but lost sized with ED. Perito was shooting for a 20cm Titan but when I check my card it says I got an 18cm. I am about 5 inches now - maybe 5 1/4 after cycling for two months. My girth is not great. I think she just doesn't get off for a combination of factors. After such a long lay off I was hoping it would recharge us but I think I waited too long for the implant. I love my wife so looking outside the marriage is out. I am hoping that she will recharge ...any advice or thoughts would be appreciated. BTW, she is 66 but in really good shape physically.

8smoth, I’ll PM you what my wife did to get her libido and sexual health back.

Your Bionic Brother in Texas
SWorks

[8smoth]

Thanks SWorks17...please do.