I was looking over the FrankTalk forums the last couple days, and I just went to sign up for the site when I realized that my account information was already auto-filled in. I had completely forgotten that I made a few posts back in 2013 as I was about to turn 30. So interesting to re-read those. Much has changed for me in the past 6 years, but of course some is the same, because I'm back here!
To briefly summarize, my ED seemed to start around age 16. I remember having tons of boners early in my teens. After that, for reasons unknown, morning wood and spontaneous erections became much more fleeting. I had a couple girlfriends in college I was sexually active with, but I definitely had numerous failures and way more trouble than would be expected for my age. Things slowly progressed south (pun intended) until 2010 when I had a sleep study ordered by the urologist which revealed that my erections were in fact weaker than they should be. 2 subsequent duplex ultrasounds revealed good arterial inflow but excessive outflow, aka venous leak. Thankfully, Viagra and Cialis worked really well for me at the time, with my then-girlfriend who was very supportive. Looks like I posted back in 2013 when I was back out on the singles market and the Cialis wasn't working so well.
Well, a couple of things happened after that. I had a cavernosogram under x-ray (fortunate to find a urologist who did that), which the urologist saw no evidence of venous leak/contrast extravasation. I had a repeat penile duplex ultrasound by a really respected urologist that actually produced an unusually good erection. He said saw no evidence of venous leak, and I still remember him calling it a "10/10 diamond cutter." I actually needed an injection to put the erection down. That really gave a boost to my esteem. I found a good combination of 5mg Cialis and 50mg Viagra, and feeling I had done all the workup I could for the time, put it to good use.
The next few years were really good to me. I lived by the beach and spent 30-32 making up for all the sex I didn't have in my 20s. Meeting and and having fun (and sex!) with several different women, not feeling limited, was so beneficial to my self-esteem and a formative experience for me. I honestly think it made me a better person, as if layers of bitterness got chipped away from me. Eventually I progressed from hook-ups to relationships and got married last year! She is a great person and super attractive, I'm very lucky to have her.
But obviously all is not perfect because I'm back here. Well over the last couple years, especially this past year, my old trustworthy combo of 5mg Cialis and 50mg Viagra is not such a sure thing anymore. I have had several instances, increasingly, where I have lost my erection during sex in spite of the meds. I think now it's been a slow progression. The failures hurt now just as much as they did in the past. Even doubling up the Viagra to 100mg, which I've done over the last few months, hasn't made a big difference.
So while it's been a good run, I think I'm nearing the end of the time that oral meds are effective for me. I met with a urologist (a different one, I keep moving) last week and will be trying Cialis 5mg daily as well as prn meds. I also think I may order a VED, not for sex, but for some daily pump/stretching/rehab. I did that for several months back in 2013, and I think it may have helped.
I have been reading people's experiences with ED, meds, injections, and implants. It's just as helpful to me now as it was then. The idea of feeling masculine and remaining sexual is very important to me. It's so inspiring to read how guys have remained happy, strong, and sexual despite the hurdles. The accounts I've read of younger guys with implants whose lives are doing well are especially helpful to me, and I really want to thank those who have put their stories out there. I think I'll be there myself sooner or later. For now, I'm trying to buy a little more time.
Otter
