feeling for the woman

[whatisthislife]

ive decided that i am going to go ahead weith the implant. i will spend the next 6 months getting into my best physical shape possible (i have a SCI) and will work on maximising my natural recovery (strengthening pelvic floor, hip flexors etc), although it has been 2 years.

for those of you with partners can you comment on what they have shared about how it feels for them compared to a natural penis\?

thanks,

[ED2013]

Fully pumped is harder than natural. You could pump less to feel natural. Women love it.

[Rider1400]

I’ve been married 36 years and hate to say but it’s been a struggle with the wife. Don’t get me wrong, she has worked with me for 10 years on pills and 16 months with injections. She was by my side every step of the way thru the implant surgery. However….. once activated, she has really struggled with how it feels.. she says it just don’t feel normal… I say it isn’t!!! It’s better!!! It really became a problem for us for several months as it took som adjustment. At times I got very upset with her because she was struggling with it being”fake”. Then I realized she has never had another dick in her hand, mouth, or vagina in her whole life!!! Sure it required an adjustment period. Once I got a lot more patience it helped matters. Things are smoothing out now, but I guess I just didn’t think about my wife having to adjust to my new bionics. Guys that’s been married a long time….. keep in mind your wife dealt with you and your ED for many years… over13 years for me…. So if it takes 3-4 or even 6 months to adjust to the new you, be patient… reap the benefits later!
!!

[tomas1]

My wife has never complained about the new me and really seems to like it.
She once told me that I should have skipped the pills and injections.

[Wiggles123]

The implant was never an issue. My wife likes it even more!

[merrix]

I've been writing quite a lot about this in My Journal: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=6010

But I can say that my wife, whom I've been with for >20 years, is very grateful I did this.
Her experience of lovers before she met me is in the mid-to-high single digits. All 20-30 years old at that time.

Her words:
- When having penetrative sex, she will not feel anything unnatural about my dick. Maybe (and that is really a maybe - not definitely) that it is a bit harder than a normal dick when I inflate it to the maximum, but still nothing that would have raised her suspicions if she didn't know.
- When giving me a blow job, she says that it does feel harder than normal when I inflate to the maximum, but very normal when holding back a bit. But same thing here, if she didn't know, she would not assume my dick was a piece of plastics. Just unusually hard.
- Her preference when it comes to hardness for intercourse is super hard. Basically the harder I inflate, the better she likes it. Except for some reason when she is laying on her side. Then she feels uncomfortable with the super hard inflation level. It seems the angle of penetration in this position somehow is different.

A remark on the hardness: I can get my Titan super hard. I pump it with two hands till I grunt as if I was in the gym. And it gets hard, believe me. But this talk about "steel rod", "broom stick", etc - Really? When comparing the Titan to a super hard natural erection, I'd say that there is hardness and hardness.
One is how hard it is to the touch. And here I'd say, yes, it's harder than a natural dick. It has more of a "skin on steel" feeling than a natural dick. This is probably why full hardness feels unnatural when giving a blowjob.
Then there is bending, i.e. can the shaft be bent? And as I remember it, on a good day, when my Viagra really kicked in the best possible way, I think my dick was just as hard (i.e. no bending in the shaft).
Finally there is flexing, as how much can the dick "wobble", as in still having a super hard shaft, but point in different directions. Up, down, sideways. In this respect, my Titan is harder than the best natural dick. It has basically no flex at all when I inflate to the maximum. Think of the bath towel test.

So which one of these three hardness parameters is most important for her?
I'd say the hard to the touch is probably just negative and what gives our dicks away as unnatural.
The no-bending shaft is probably the most important and I am not so sure the Titan is any harder than a natural super-erection in this respect. Hence why my wife does not really think my dick is much harder than a perfect natural erection when I am inside her. It feels just right. As it should. Which is a good thing, not a bad thing.
The base-flex is double edged sword. Perhaps this aspect of the Titan's hardness is a bit unnatural, as in the flex is less than the perfect natural erection. That is sometimes bad, as in my example above when she is laying on her side, but sometimes good. As in when she is on top. And if I want to play around with my dick. Pushing it up against her G-spot, going all the way out between thrusts and then in again without hands, etc.

But overall, I think there is an exaggeration on that a max inflated implant is something completely unnatural, that a woman who gets fucked by maximum inflated implanted would feel like she was penetrated by a baseball bat. I disagree. A fully inflated Titan is very, very hard. But so is a 20 year old's raging hardon as well, though in a slightly different way (as in the three parameters I described).

Then there is the most important aspect of how it feels for her. The psychological one. Someone on here posted that his wife had a hard time accepting his dick, it felt artificial etc. And hence she didn't like the sex as much as before.
In our case, my wife loves it. She orgasms every bloody time we have sex, which was definitely not the case in the past with my inconsistent ED dick. She was simply too worried about my erection, putting all her focus on avoiding my dick going down, making me come before it went down - that there was simply no room left in her mind for focusing on herself and her own enjoyment.
Now she can just relax. We have all the time we need, my dick will always stay up. That in combination with my new-born abilities, being able to play around, gives her all she needs to wander away to orgasm land. On the other hand, probably because she does have all the time she needs - she doesn't need a lot of time at all. She will normally come within a few minutes. Standard procedure for us is she comes first, and then I can come whenever I want.
She has told me several times that this is the major change for her, and the major advantage with the implant. The constant worrying over my erection’s be or not be every time we had sex was painful for her, and for me of course.
We’re freed from that crap now.

[northernboy]

In regards to the actual physical aspect of sex, my wife has had absolutely no complaints with the implant. We are having the most enjoyable sex in years. She does not find the implant to be noticeable other than me being harder than I ever was naturally.

The one problem that we have run into with the implant is a purely emotional one. My wife has always been a tease and a flirt. The implant has of course done nothing to bring back erections as a response to her actions. So even though she excites me incredibly, she never gets that satisfaction of knowing that she has made me hard by just being herself. I know that this has been difficult for her to accept at times and I can totally understand it.

I think a lot of women get satisfaction from knowing that they have made a guy hard to the point where it feels like it is going to burst. The way it is now with me saying that she makes me excited and hold on let me pump it up is just not quite the same. I think sometimes it gives her a why bother feeling.

Don't get me wrong, my wife has been incredibly supportive and I never would have made it through this journey without her. I am also very happy with my implant but we need to remember that we are not the only ones that face challenges or a sense of loss. Our partners also have some life changes to deal with because of this surgery and we need to take into account what they are going through.

I would never let this stand in the way of getting an implant but be sure to discuss everything with your partner including how they are feeling about the implant.

[Old Guy]

Had no complaints from my wife. Only thing she said about it was that it felt smaller, but that was soon after activation. Now our times are not planned ahead like when I was doing injections or taking pills. It's darn near as good as old times.

[stephen54]

I'm sure I've written elsewhere here about my wife's emotional and physical reactions post-implant...but, in a nustshell, the physical took far less adjusting for her vs the psychological.

She's quite aggressive, sexual, flirty. We're extremely open. We talk about sex, always have, bluntly, openly. So, she's talked through with me, plenty, about the thing she feels she's "lost", ie, the trajectory of my arousal and what she calls a continuum of responses in my dick now vs prior. Specifically - her ability to feel my response against her body, in her hand, in her mouth.

She flirts, says or does something suggestive, dirty...and my dick of course now does not respond as it did years ago with a more gradual predictable harder, harder, harder response. She liked that. She liked knowing she had these effects on me. She thinks my response getting harder, via her dirtiness, fulfilled something in her. Validated something about her sexiness, how much she can turn a guy on, etc. Turns out, when she's really come to think on this on her own, she has explained to me that this was something she feels post-transplant that has been lost for her and we've had to acknowledge this and help her find her way. Even in the context of when I was taking pills, my dick was somewhat obviously responsive to her...it engorged to whatever degree...we could have sex to whatever degree. There was an obvious engorging response (even if that response did not meet my/our needs when it came to sustained penetration).

The feedback loop from years ago where something salacious on her part very directly and obviously equated to, mostly predictably, a physical response in my dick. She...a lot of her sexual energy...very much fed off that loop of action/response/action/response and my dick of course acts mostly indifferently to her now in that regard. So we have learned to experiment with varying numbers of pumps for varying situations. Less pumps for oral. A few more pumps for anal. Max (usually) pumps for vaginal. Adjusting the inflation level in-line, during sex (either harder or softer). Sometimes she participates in pumping me or deflating me (this - was - not - quick or easy to help her learn). More often she prefers I read the signals and that I make the hardness adjustments. She's found a way in her mind to compartmentalize what's happening, to some extent, and to just enjoy the new world. But I'm lying if I tell you that there was not a psychological adjustment for her in the early going after implantation. There was. We had to dissect that stuff out and examine it together. She still occasionally slightly glitches when I'm just suddenly hard as a rock with (in her reality) no precursor activities leading up. It's just an adjustment. Thankfully we are extremely communicative and proactive talking about sex. So we address shit head on. Creatively as possible.

The physical - she's a penetration girl. She wants her pussy filled and she wants to be taken, usually, pretty hard and pretty assertively. Her feelings on the physicality of my implant are that she loves it vaginally at max. Loves. It. She is aggressive and fucks hard and she loves that my dick gives as good as it gets and never has to recuperate or rest or back down from her...I don't know...onslaught, is what it feels like at times. So physically she loves my new dick's resilience and staying power. She loves the complete lack of limitations to positions and activities. The one surprising physical change for her has been the opening up (pun unintended) of anal. We struggled with anal prior. My dick was bigger pre-implant and my glans was fatter and she's small. So anal was a very careful endeavor that she wanted to like and that she wanted...to want...but the physicality was tough.

Now post-implant it's not only much more workable, but she actually has enjoyed anal with my implant more recently because she's at the onset less fearful of my size (so guys, there's a fucking seriously big bonus for those of us who lost some sizing) and because we can kind of custom tailor my degrees of hardness. She absolutely does not like max hardness for anal. But a 60-70% inflations give or take? Bingo. Obviously an individual thing, but this has been a really nice revelation for us both.

At a simple level, how my dick feels to her, in her hand, in her mouth, in her pussy, she compares its hardness to what my dick was like when injections were very fine tuned and working like a charm. In context - she's my second wife - and we got together when pills were starting to taper off for me in efficacy and I started injections when I met her. So she's never known my original, unedited organic dick. She barely knew my pill-only-dick. Her context is pills+injections and then just injections. Hell, I barely remember my own organic no-pill, no-injection dick. It was honestly so fucking LONG ago. So who knows.

She has said before that she's maybe inclined to log in here on FT sometime and be open to answering questions from a girl's perspective, so maybe there's value in that. I don't know if there are other women on here, I imagine there are? And this is a dude's forum, for sure, I get that, but obviously there could be value in a specific subset of women directly offering up their feelings without it passing through the lens/sensibilities of us guys.

[nuance]

Can women feel the tips during BJ? Hiding the pump is out of question but wondering if hard tip makes it uncomfortable for them.