Young man in need of advice

[Ezz616]

I am currently 17, 18 in two months at which point I intend to aggressively pursue an implant. I've suffered from on and off ED for about 3 and a half years which I ignored because I could still sometimes get an erection until shit completely hit the fan about 4 months ago and I can't achieve an erection on maximum doses of Vardenafil, Tadalafil, or Sildenafil and VED's with cock rings don't work either because the blood just goes back inside my body. Im not open to injections and I feel my trying of lifestyle changes i.e weight loss, healthy diet, more exercise which have put me in great shape, along with the oral medications, and VED make me a good candidate for an implant. The only issue is that most urologists are unwilling to see me because I would be considered a "pediatric" case so I have to wait until I turn 18 until I can make any meaningful progress in getting an implant which is extremely frustrating. Im really determined and driven to get an implant and I'm certain that the implant is my solution because it will allow me to feel cured and live life like any other teenager. I am lucky to have a supportive dad who promises to get this taken care of and even offered to pay out of pocket if the insurance company tries to enforce making me do bullshit psychosexual therapy or invasive tests beyond a doppler that could prolong the process of getting an implant and he's going to try and get me an appointment with a Coloplast "center of excellence" doctor in my home town who was fellowship trained in implants. If that doesn't work out however I am going to contact Dr. Eid.

The advice that I need however regards sex in general preferably from someone who lost their virginity later than average. So far I've been unable to have sex and really feel frustrated about it since I know that it is easily fixable with an implant. Having ED is terrible for my confidence and while I've flirted with girls and have been called "cute" and "fine" the ED has always been a cruel reminder that I am not currently able to have a fulfilling romantic and sexual relationship. I haven't even had my first kiss yet even though I'm 17 because I"ve avoided girls out of fear of embarrassing myself if anything were to lead to a sexual situation. So far I have not experienced trying to have sex and not getting it up which I am grateful for and I sympathize with any guy who has experienced that because I can't imagine anything more embarrassing and emasculating.

How do I handle inexperience once I start dating and having sex?
How do I cope with knowing I am going to lose my virginity later than other guys especially since it's not really a choice?
How much do women care about guys being virgins? (I probably won't tell anyone but I still want to know)
What's the best way to find dates and get laid?
What's the best way to gain sexual confidence?
How do you make yourself more attractive to women?

Luckily I am not depressed like a lot of other young guys in my situation and am blessed to have a supportive father who will not give up on me but I still have worries and anxieties just like any one else suffering with ED. Hopefully all goes well in getting an implant and I can move quickly in making it happen so I can start my sex life.

[Txagq8]

How do I handle inexperience once I start dating and having sex?
How do I cope with knowing I am going to lose my virginity later than other guys especially since it's not really a choice?
How much do women care about guys being virgins? (I probably won't tell anyone but I still want to know)
What's the best way to find dates and get laid?
What's the best way to gain sexual confidence?
How do you make yourself more attractive to women?

There are your questions.

I will answer a few of them. I want to preface any comment I make by saying that the best person for you to talk to would be your dad. From your previous post it sounds like you’ve actually got a pretty damn good father and he is able to give you really sound advice. On the other hand I’ve been in your shoes and I understand sometimes you want a variety of opinions.

First of all. Do not worry about inexperience. That takes care of itself is you gain experience. Regardless of what you might think very few, if any, of your partners are going to have any more experience in this arena than you do.

You make it sound like you have 1 foot in the grave. You are a young man. If you did not engage in sex prior to age 25, you would still be a young man. I am looking at a chart that I got off the Internet, stating that the median age for a male, first time sex, in the United States is 18.6 years. Truthfully? That sounds about right. Median means half are earlier and half are later. Instead of worrying about when you have sex for the first time you need to be concentrating on making sure it is with the right person and for the right reasons.

Quit worrying about what your partner might think. This is neither an act nor a sport. It is an instinct. When the time comes, you will know what to do.

If you will focus on dates and relationships, the sex part will tend to take care of itself. You don’t need to drive yourself insane worrying about getting laid. Sex is not a notch on your bed’s headboard or belt buckle. If you were trying to get laid, so you can tell everyone you got laid then you are definitely heading in the wrong direction and going about this in the worst possible way.

The best way I can describe to you how to be more attractive to women is to tell you to be yourself. All people & that includes women are able to spot a phony. Be the best person you know how to be. Work out. Pursue interesting hobbies and activities. Don’t isolate yourself-make friends with a wide variety of people with different interests and from different backgrounds.

You need to get out of the mindset that sex is somehow a goal. A good and caring relationship is the goal and if you achieve that then the sex part will take care of itself.

I’ve given pretty much the same speech for both my kids who are now in their early 30s. As parents we know that our kids will deal with the same sexual desires and urges that we did. All we can hope for is that they will be so wisely.

[Bambino09]

You're rushing things. I would try the injections first before the implant.

[Txagq8]

You're rushing things. I would try the injections first before the implant.

Lol. I told him that same thing a couple of months back.

It bears repeating. Puberty is not the same for everyone. Some guys have their adult cock size locked in at 15. Thank God I was not one of them. Others are like me and see growth of various bod parts until the mid-20s.

I’m not averse to a young guy getting an implant if that’s what he needs. But as a veteran of 32 years of injecting, I will testify in a court of law that it’s a damned good way to get and keep an erection for most guys, especially if you know it’s not forever. And in the case of a 18 year old, I would definitely want to wait until everything had stabilized in terms of size.

Granted, I suffered from constitutional delay of puberty so mine is an exaggerated case, but if I had had an implant at 18 instead of waiting until age 25 or so…..I would have left 2” of cock on the table. Size might not be everything but it’s much easier to be sexually confident packing 7x6 than it is 4 3/4 x 4 1/2.

[Martin6469]

Ezz: Get a full workup from an endocrinologist. Maybe your testosterone is low, or some other hormone is off. Endocrinology is very complex, and it's not a urologist's forté. (See my signature.) You'd be amazed how many hormones that have to work together precisely are in your body.

[Hunchback]

Ezz, i've lived my whole life with ED, literally. I've went through puberty, dating, first sexual experiences... i've been with my wife for over 16 years now.
I get your frustration, i really do, probably more than most people on this forum who have developed ED later in their lives... but honestly, getting an implant at your age is ridiculous.

There are many things to consider, however i don't feel like making a huge post here. If you want to, contact me in PM and we could chat over Discord or something. I am open to share my life experience and provide any guidance i can, if you need it.

Don't rush irreversible decisions!

[Bambino09]

You need a ringo cook

[oldbeek]

You have got some good advise here. Have you been tested for venous leaks.A MUST before an implant. Also at least try. an injection. Some guys ,1/3 , like me are allergic to the aldprostadil in Trimix. If allergic that is behind you because it causes pain so bad you cant use your erection.

[Txagq8]

You have got some good advise here. Have you been tested for venous leaks.A MUST before an implant. Also at least try. an injection. Some guys ,1/3 , like me are allergic to the aldprostadil in Trimix. If allergic that is behind you because it causes pain so bad you cant use your erection.

Hey, Beek, you’re right but an allergy to the alprostadil (prostaglandin e1) in Trimix doesn’t rule out the use of Bimix or Bimix plus Atropine.

When I started shots Bimix was the gold standard. In fact, it was the only standard since Alprostadil hadn’t hit the market yet.

[oldbeek]

So true. Bi mix did nothing for me. I feel so bad for these kids. I had a perfect sex life till 75 years old.