Our partners

[Bluevett]

Paul,
A few months ago I tried to join the site and you turned me down with the explanation of your reasons. At first I was mad because I was trying to seek a man's perspective of dealing with pc...my bf was dx'd with it over one year ago and our sex life and communication between us was starting to tank. But, we (women) are still allowed thread the posted comments. So I Hung in there reading and identifying the emotional issues men go through in their relationships...only they don't verbally express like women do. Now, months later, I want to give you a big hug and thanks for keeping with the sites format. I was able to get bc to visit as a guest and he can identify with many of the men on this site. He too, would not go to the site if women were allowed to "critize" the men for their expressions regarding this topic. I understand much, much better how my man thinks, feels and worries about his disease. Men do need a place for "men only" to express themselves and your site has been a blessing! Thank you...our sex life and communication has improves greatly improved, his stress level has decreased greatly and he can express his issues and concerns to me better...ualthough he has ed and low level pc.

[bob1138]

Paul,

I have talked to and tried to counsel many guys with ED over the past 3+ years as a Patient Educator for Coloplast.
They feel comfortable talking candidly with me only because I have walked in their shoes and experienced all of the negative emotions which they are now feeling about ED.
As I share my experiences before and after being implanted with the Coloplast Titan Penile Implant in 2007, I can feel a sense of renewed hope in many of the ED patients I meet with one-on-one.
I completely agree that it is a very lonely road that a man suffering with ED travels.
One 50 year old ED patient I recently spoke with said that he had divorced his wife because he was no longer able to
satisfy her and wanted to set her free. He also told me that she would be waiting for him after he underwent his
Penile Implant.
Paul, I believe the real strenght of Frank Talk is giving guys with ED the opportunity to speak candidly with brothers who can completely identify with them and, ultimately, give them hope and strength and the knowledge that life can again be as they knew before ED!!
Happy Thanksgiving to you and all my brother members of Frank Talk.

Bob

[Anonymous2]

I do some answering on a couple of sites were women pose questions on ED, and its them who are doing the looking for ED answers not there men, I have only ever seen one put down by a women on her man, they want to get info just like we do on ways to there men hard again, and, one because I think this wouod be ok to let them in on questions about ED, at the end of the day it affects both of us in relationships.

For me, it was my wife who complained that she was not getting any, as I had just gone through 3 weeks of very bad night sweats, which somehow leads to ED.

Then, they are our partners.

So why not, a man, who cant stand women being here cant be much of a man.

Guys,
good thoughts. We have kept FrankTalk as a men only board for various reasons. One of the biggest is that men will often clam up if they are aware a woman is going to be chiming in. As one guy said, "i may discuss my ED with another man, but i sure as hell am not going to discuss my ED with another man's wife!" There are probably 2-3 other sites with small forums for ED (webmd, daily strength) and my observation is that they are almost completely taken over by women who complain about their partner's ED and his lack of doing anything about it. They have turned into hostile boards for men, and have become a venue for woman whose relationships seemed doomed for reasons having nothing to do with ED. Those boards are pretty much dead.

If we want, we can certainly think about a second site, but my feeling is, women talking about Ed seems to be common on the net. There are no other places for men only. I'm interested to hear what other guys have to say.

Everyone has fears and difficulties in communicating with partners about ED. For some guys, their wives seem almost relieved that their husbands have ED. Other guys just have a hard to being that vulnerable to a partner when they feel they should be the strong, virile performers. It's complex...and difficult.
Paul

[Dave48003]

Women are free to read just about every forum on FT except the members only. I think that is wonderful, I have sent women here to help them understand what their man is going through. However, we would not feel free to have the "locker room" talk here if we thought women would be responding, in a positive or negative way. I don't think a guy should be in a breast cancer support group (though guys can get breast cancer), so I equally don't think they should be here dealing with a problem that physically is unique to men. They just can't understand how a guy feels when his dick don't stand up, period.

Dave

[regain-is-the-aim]

I agree with Dave 1,000%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (or more)

Dick

[LGX_Man]

Thumbs up to Dave (again)!!!!

Frank Talk is unique in it's approach. Being able to talk candidly and openly with other men who are in the same boat is unique and refreshing. And in the chat room, we all just get "so into it". I personally, have learned everything that I need to know about my ED and IPP from my wonderful brothers here at FT. When I first landed here, I had sooooo many questions. It was the greatest thing to finally find a community of men in the same boat that I was in, who care about helping each other out. Once again Paul, thank you SO MUCH for creating Frank Talk.

I believe we'd be much more refrained from speaking candidly if we had to deal with the residents of Venus.

LGX_Man

[Woodicould]

I am getting into the discussion a bit late but here is my story. Lupron was part of my treatment and we, as well as my adult kids, could joke about the public side effects like hot flashes and then my needing to go pee in a hurry. When ED set in we talked about the need for pills and it wasn't an issue for her. I did buy Virginia and Keith Laken's book Learning to Love Again and I hoped we could read it together so she might understand the mans point of view about ED. I read ahead of her and then when she started reading their doing 69 turned her off. But she is sympathetic and understanding in her own way. I am able to get erections again on my own much of the time. If I can't it isn't an issue for her and we just enjoy each others bodies and trust it will be better another day. Actually my PCa treatment has caused us to have a better physical relationship. So in many ways it has been a blessing to us.