Sorry the post is kind of long I really appreciate those of you that read it, I just had to let loose my feelings:
Hey guys,
First and foremost I really appreciate those of you who read my story. It's been a long and miserable nightmare of a ride these last 2 years.
So my ED began 2 years ago with my ex-fiance. It happened once, (It was a psychological form of ED) and I was instantly depressed about it. Couldn't sleep, eat, anything for over a month. I eventually got a pill of Viagra from a friend and managed to have sex once, and then gradually over the coming months I slowly regained sexual function, at one point very well. 5 months ago my fiance (The so called love of my life who meant the absolute world to me) decided we had to break it off after four years of promising we'd be together forever. It's been a hard, hard lesson. My ED was still in my mind and she was basically my support system, I felt safe and comfortable with myself because I knew if it happened..it wouldn't be that big of a deal, and she knew ways of making it work out generally.
After the break up I began to get horribly depressed (I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder after I had a manic breakdown where I thought I was God for 2 months - the manic breakdown was a safety net my brain went to after using Adderall excessively and going through the break up. Longgg story..) and have been depressed ever since. I quit my 2 jobs and am not attending school, only receiving disability pay right now.
After everything that has happened, I am a miserable wreck for a number of reasons. Number one, my ED is 100% stuck in my subconscious at all times. It has turned me into a completely timid, shy person that is afraid to talk to girls. Complete opposite of who I used to be..I'm the quiet person on the couch at parties now opposed to the social party guy I used to be when I was with her. I did end up dating this girl for the last month and managed to have sex with her once - BARELY. I had seen a urologist weeks prior and gotten a sample pack of Viagra-which barely, barely worked and I kept losing erections constantly.
I used to have everything on the ball...now after my ex has left me it has unfortunately torn my life apart for the worst. I know you shouldn't have to rely on someone to make your life happy...but I guess she just masked my darkest problem and kept me happy that I wasn't where I am now...alone.
Anyway, to treat my ED I have considered most options available out there. Not only do I suffer from ED, I also suffer from performance anxiety and premature ejaculation. I have tried Viagra which works slightly, I just hate that you have to time when you are going to have sex...such a hard thing to do when you are single and don't have a partner. It's just demeaning to have to rely on pills to get you hard after what you were once used to. I tried hypnosis therapy (A $10 .mp3 file I bought off the internet) which actually worked a little bit, but not indefinitely. I've heard about the injections and pumps..but come on that is just seemingly ridiculous. Can you imagine being single and being with a girl for the first time and having to use a pump? And a needle in my dick...please God no. So I guess this is why I am here...
I know I'm only 22 years old but I cannot live like this anymore. I am stuck in the gutter until I solve this problem. To feel better lately I have been resorting to things like hard drugs (Ironically I am studying to be a Drug and Alcohol Counselor...yes I have stooped that low) and I know damn well this is not the answer so I need to nip this thing in the bud. The last 2 months I have been strongly considering a penile implant. I know that it is the last measure, but I swear to God it seems like the only option that could get me back to my old self. So I guess my questions would be 1), how hard would it be to get approved for the surgery, and 2) is there any better option for a severe case like me? (I am in San Diego, CA) Once I could just have my sexual identity/confidence back I would get my old self back..not the pathetic depressed person I am now. I know that solving this problem is key to getting me out of this rut...I have a life to live, and I'm young and these days are going by so fast. For the first time in my life these past couple weeks I have actually had suicidal thoughts. I feel betrayed, inadequate, like I have no purpose or reason to live. Please help guys...sorry for such a long post. I really appreciate those of you who read/offer any feedback.
My story..
My story..
Name's Ian..
22 year old suffering from chronic/severe psychological ed.
When I find the solution, I'll list it here <_>
22 year old suffering from chronic/severe psychological ed.
When I find the solution, I'll list it here <_>
Re: My story..
The implant is for men whose ED is due to physical/medical problems. It sounds like your ED is due to emotional/psychological issues. Are these issues causing your ED or is your ED causing your emotional/psychological issues? To rule out any physical/medical problems for your ED, I recommend seeing a urologist and having yourself tested. Finally, have you considered serious therapy?
KMeister
KMeister
Re: My story..
Welcome Ian,
I think one way to answer some of your questions would be to share my own struggle with ED and how I was able to have it permanently corrected.
I developed ED Post-Prostatectomy in February 2004 at age 65.
I had never had an ED problem prior to my Prostatectomy.
I experienced many of the negative emotions associated with ED, lack of self-esteem, anger, shame for not being able to satisfy my wife of over 40 years, etc.
Viagra, Cialis, etc. did not work for me.
Please make an appointment with a Urologist who specializes in male sexual dysfunction.
He should run a Doppler Test to determine if there is sufficient blood flow to your penis and several other tests.
Personally, I attended several Seminars on the Coloplast Titan Penile Implant and read extensively on the subject but was still not ready to move forward. Then I had the opportunity to speak with 2 men who had the Titan Penile Implant Procedure done. Three weeks later, December 13, 2007, I had my Titan Procedure done at Hackensack University
Medical Center in Bergen County, New Jersey by Dr. Hossein Sadeghi, a highly regarded Penile Implant Surgeon.
The Titan Penile Implant permanently corrected my ED and restored both my sex life and the emotional intimacy of my wife of 45 years.
I share this to show you that a complete and satisfying sex life is definitely possible after developing ED.
I became a Patient Educator for Coloplast in January 2008 in order to share my Pre-Implant and Post-Implant experiences
with men who are still suffering with ED and its devastating side effects.
Ian, I have counseled several young men in your age group suffering with ED so I do have an idea of what you are going through now. Please keep strong and have faith that there is a solution.
The guys in the FT Group are a great source of strength and encouragement.
Please feel free to contact me in the Forums, Chat Room or PM if you have questions or just want to talk.
Bob
I think one way to answer some of your questions would be to share my own struggle with ED and how I was able to have it permanently corrected.
I developed ED Post-Prostatectomy in February 2004 at age 65.
I had never had an ED problem prior to my Prostatectomy.
I experienced many of the negative emotions associated with ED, lack of self-esteem, anger, shame for not being able to satisfy my wife of over 40 years, etc.
Viagra, Cialis, etc. did not work for me.
Please make an appointment with a Urologist who specializes in male sexual dysfunction.
He should run a Doppler Test to determine if there is sufficient blood flow to your penis and several other tests.
Personally, I attended several Seminars on the Coloplast Titan Penile Implant and read extensively on the subject but was still not ready to move forward. Then I had the opportunity to speak with 2 men who had the Titan Penile Implant Procedure done. Three weeks later, December 13, 2007, I had my Titan Procedure done at Hackensack University
Medical Center in Bergen County, New Jersey by Dr. Hossein Sadeghi, a highly regarded Penile Implant Surgeon.
The Titan Penile Implant permanently corrected my ED and restored both my sex life and the emotional intimacy of my wife of 45 years.
I share this to show you that a complete and satisfying sex life is definitely possible after developing ED.
I became a Patient Educator for Coloplast in January 2008 in order to share my Pre-Implant and Post-Implant experiences
with men who are still suffering with ED and its devastating side effects.
Ian, I have counseled several young men in your age group suffering with ED so I do have an idea of what you are going through now. Please keep strong and have faith that there is a solution.
The guys in the FT Group are a great source of strength and encouragement.
Please feel free to contact me in the Forums, Chat Room or PM if you have questions or just want to talk.
Bob
Re: My story..
Ian, welcome to FT. Just about anyone with ED has some depression and psychological fallout from it. I really didn't realize how much a boner on demand would change my outlook, but I'm here to tell you it does.
I also had ED at a young age and struggled many years, always concerned I was satisfying my partner. You obviously have a more severe situation than I did. I might suggest you find a female friend, f-buddy. I dated a couple of girls when I was single, we had a lot of fun together both in and out of the sack, but we were just friends, so no romantic baggage to carry around. I was able to relax and enjoy the moment, it helped a lot.
My last comment, an implant is not the "last resort" that I so commonly hear it described as. Yes, it is a major decision, but in my case there were other things that worked, but less than satisfactory. A pump or VED worked, but I lost sensation in my penis and had a heck of a time ejaculating. And when I did, it felt really weird. Pills worked, sometimes. Injections worked quite well, but as I told my doctor, there was no romance, it was like making an appointment at the local whore house. Check with her to see if she has time the next morning, wake her up, get up and clean up and inject, stand up with a ring on to let it work, etc. If I laid down, it wouldn't work, so I stood while she did oral on me, real romantic. Doc was able to get me approved in less than a week. Medically, they consider the fact you can penetrate as a successful erection. I strongly object.
Please, get some professional help, you need it. Get your life back on track, find a good urologist and work toward a solution to your ED. If you find a lady and you think you might be heading toward intimacy, talk to her honestly. If she cares about you, she will work with you. If she won't work with you on this, how do you think she will be when marriage problems happen? Get rid of her now, trust me, its not a loss. Relax and decide you are going to not worry about finding a life partner right now and just go out in groups and have a good time. I found a lot of women who would hop in the sack with me when I honestly told them that I wasn't in love with them. They appreciated the honesty! AND, please stay on your meds for your bipolar. I had a friend with it. When he told me, I was really shocked, I had no idea. Then he told me his history, going off the meds because he thought he didn't need them. Not a good idea.
You are among friends here, lean on us.
Dave
I also had ED at a young age and struggled many years, always concerned I was satisfying my partner. You obviously have a more severe situation than I did. I might suggest you find a female friend, f-buddy. I dated a couple of girls when I was single, we had a lot of fun together both in and out of the sack, but we were just friends, so no romantic baggage to carry around. I was able to relax and enjoy the moment, it helped a lot.
My last comment, an implant is not the "last resort" that I so commonly hear it described as. Yes, it is a major decision, but in my case there were other things that worked, but less than satisfactory. A pump or VED worked, but I lost sensation in my penis and had a heck of a time ejaculating. And when I did, it felt really weird. Pills worked, sometimes. Injections worked quite well, but as I told my doctor, there was no romance, it was like making an appointment at the local whore house. Check with her to see if she has time the next morning, wake her up, get up and clean up and inject, stand up with a ring on to let it work, etc. If I laid down, it wouldn't work, so I stood while she did oral on me, real romantic. Doc was able to get me approved in less than a week. Medically, they consider the fact you can penetrate as a successful erection. I strongly object.
Please, get some professional help, you need it. Get your life back on track, find a good urologist and work toward a solution to your ED. If you find a lady and you think you might be heading toward intimacy, talk to her honestly. If she cares about you, she will work with you. If she won't work with you on this, how do you think she will be when marriage problems happen? Get rid of her now, trust me, its not a loss. Relax and decide you are going to not worry about finding a life partner right now and just go out in groups and have a good time. I found a lot of women who would hop in the sack with me when I honestly told them that I wasn't in love with them. They appreciated the honesty! AND, please stay on your meds for your bipolar. I had a friend with it. When he told me, I was really shocked, I had no idea. Then he told me his history, going off the meds because he thought he didn't need them. Not a good idea.
You are among friends here, lean on us.
Dave
Charter member of the Brotherhood of Bionic Boners.
69 YO with a venous leak since puberty, made worse by meds & diabetes. Tried pills, a VED, and injections before my AMS 700LGX was implanted 3-17-2011. A life changing event!
69 YO with a venous leak since puberty, made worse by meds & diabetes. Tried pills, a VED, and injections before my AMS 700LGX was implanted 3-17-2011. A life changing event!
Re: My story..
Hi Edmustgo
I understand your situation and I can feel it for the reason being a person with a severe predisposition to depressions and with the history of a suicidal attempt at the age approximately as yours.
I know it is very hard to find the way out when it seems like the world is cold and cruel and you think nobody cares of your existence. I had been suffering that crap multiplied by anxiety, panic attacks and sleep disorder for years. No anti-depressant ever worked on me. Just like you I've developed the social-phobia... until I found a solution. Though the solution worked just for me and I cannot say if that will work for you.
My starting point was to accept the fact that if you cannot change the world, just finds the benefit of your "new" personality. Though quite likely what you see as changes is nothing more than bringing to the surface your real self – at least it my case now I am “real” and I do not play any “social roles”.
What I did to myself was that I recognised the fact that indeed nobody gives a crap about my existence; so it is only up to me how I am to spend the rest of my life. Yes, I am a socio-phobic and... I am proud of it. I can speak of that loud and I do not try to "fix" myself. I am a "dark cynic" but that works to my advantage - I can see the "false smiles" from ten miles. I do not trust anybody but that is to my benefit too - I always develop the "plan B". I do not waist my life on useless conversation - "How are you? - I am fine. - How was your weekend?"... etc. as if somebody cares how was the weekend of another person
I realise that this type of conversations is an important part of social life but… I do not care and if people want to have real talk about what really is important – I am open and honest – no “politically correct” wrapper around.
I think you've got the point...
That was my "philosophical" work to do. Self-reliance and self-confidence was what brought me the inner peace. I try not to put myself dependant on anybody else, no matter what’s the motivation.
However along my journey I discovered an objective reason too that was really spoiling my mental effort. I couldn't understand why all the time my temper was going up and down... until I found out that I had a perfect testosterone level... for a 70yo person while being half of that age
. So I've started the testosterone therapy which made a big difference to my mood. Basically it became constant - I am no longer deeply pessimistic nor am I optimistic. Most of the time, I am constantly stable. I still get “black days” and I do panic occasionally but this is nothing in comparison to what I used to have. From time to time I even get suicidal thoughts but deeply inside I know those thoughts are safe and work as a matter of a “psychological therapy” only.
So I would advise you to check with your doctor your T-Level and if it is low you'd find quite a difference if you start carefully increase it.
P.S. One of my main principles is the ancient Vikings’ saying “Anything that doesn’t kill us, just makes us stronger.” Think about that.
I understand your situation and I can feel it for the reason being a person with a severe predisposition to depressions and with the history of a suicidal attempt at the age approximately as yours.
I know it is very hard to find the way out when it seems like the world is cold and cruel and you think nobody cares of your existence. I had been suffering that crap multiplied by anxiety, panic attacks and sleep disorder for years. No anti-depressant ever worked on me. Just like you I've developed the social-phobia... until I found a solution. Though the solution worked just for me and I cannot say if that will work for you.
My starting point was to accept the fact that if you cannot change the world, just finds the benefit of your "new" personality. Though quite likely what you see as changes is nothing more than bringing to the surface your real self – at least it my case now I am “real” and I do not play any “social roles”.
What I did to myself was that I recognised the fact that indeed nobody gives a crap about my existence; so it is only up to me how I am to spend the rest of my life. Yes, I am a socio-phobic and... I am proud of it. I can speak of that loud and I do not try to "fix" myself. I am a "dark cynic" but that works to my advantage - I can see the "false smiles" from ten miles. I do not trust anybody but that is to my benefit too - I always develop the "plan B". I do not waist my life on useless conversation - "How are you? - I am fine. - How was your weekend?"... etc. as if somebody cares how was the weekend of another person
I realise that this type of conversations is an important part of social life but… I do not care and if people want to have real talk about what really is important – I am open and honest – no “politically correct” wrapper around.I think you've got the point...
That was my "philosophical" work to do. Self-reliance and self-confidence was what brought me the inner peace. I try not to put myself dependant on anybody else, no matter what’s the motivation.
However along my journey I discovered an objective reason too that was really spoiling my mental effort. I couldn't understand why all the time my temper was going up and down... until I found out that I had a perfect testosterone level... for a 70yo person while being half of that age
. So I've started the testosterone therapy which made a big difference to my mood. Basically it became constant - I am no longer deeply pessimistic nor am I optimistic. Most of the time, I am constantly stable. I still get “black days” and I do panic occasionally but this is nothing in comparison to what I used to have. From time to time I even get suicidal thoughts but deeply inside I know those thoughts are safe and work as a matter of a “psychological therapy” only.So I would advise you to check with your doctor your T-Level and if it is low you'd find quite a difference if you start carefully increase it.
P.S. One of my main principles is the ancient Vikings’ saying “Anything that doesn’t kill us, just makes us stronger.” Think about that.
Re: My story..
Ian,
My heart goes out to you. In your twenties a lot of guys' thinking is that their sex life defines who they are. Believe me, you are much more than how well hung you are, how long you can keep it up, and other stuff. Some girls may also focus on that shit but not all. Twenties is a hard time and society projects through media a very sexualised image of identity and life. What I am trying to reach as quickly but subtly without preachiness is you need to do two things in response to your ED.
First you need the blood flow test to check whether you have a physical issue that prevents erections. I would suspect from your comments that the problem is non-physical.
Second you need to find excellent psychology professional. You may need to try more than one before you head in teh right direction towards getting sorted. Getting psychological counselling doesn't mean your sick, crazy, weak or anything. Stuff happens in people's lives which screw with us. I had a psychologist as a means of achieving personal growth when I was mid twenties and it helped me move on.
My ED is as a result of penile nerve damage from a prostatectomy which was supposed to be "nerve-sparing". I am researching and comparing notes with others in rehabilitating the physical problem that prevents me from having a spontaneous erection even though I am "aroused" in my head. I am working on the basis that alternating between an injection therapy called "Trimix" and Viagra I will oxygenate the organ tissue and one day be able to function well sexually with oral medication. If your ED is found to be purely or predominantly physical then an implant may be the only way you will ever escape ED. Serious venous leak will render even injections useless. If however as I am almost sure, your issue is largely a psychological one, your best chances of being the best you can be is to tackle the problem not the symptom.
I'm not a doctor or a psychologist or a counsellor but I do know after years of "working on myself" that if you are prepared to do the work and open up to a good counsellor that the way back to "wholeness" is not the huge mountain you will have built up in your mind. With all respect to the guys here who have needed to take the implant route, you really should IMO not rush in and you should try to take your mind off "the problem = the symptoms, that is ED" and reprogram your mind to "the solution is working on my self identity, I am a good person and I am on a journey of discovery".
Please Ian, continue to share your story here, there are some really caring and compassionate people who can all relate to aspects of your life story to date. Remember you have a long road ahead of you and the decisions you make, advice you heed etc will determine how you will be at 25, 30, 40, and beyond. ED can, I know from experience, feel like a trap and prison that is like a circular argument. Getting healthy in your mind is almost certainly your best way forward but you need to give yourself time and take the pressure off yourself. Plenty of guys started with performance anxiety and failed to deal with it and got worse.
Best wishes and try to avoid desperation Ian.
Muz
My heart goes out to you. In your twenties a lot of guys' thinking is that their sex life defines who they are. Believe me, you are much more than how well hung you are, how long you can keep it up, and other stuff. Some girls may also focus on that shit but not all. Twenties is a hard time and society projects through media a very sexualised image of identity and life. What I am trying to reach as quickly but subtly without preachiness is you need to do two things in response to your ED.
First you need the blood flow test to check whether you have a physical issue that prevents erections. I would suspect from your comments that the problem is non-physical.
Second you need to find excellent psychology professional. You may need to try more than one before you head in teh right direction towards getting sorted. Getting psychological counselling doesn't mean your sick, crazy, weak or anything. Stuff happens in people's lives which screw with us. I had a psychologist as a means of achieving personal growth when I was mid twenties and it helped me move on.
My ED is as a result of penile nerve damage from a prostatectomy which was supposed to be "nerve-sparing". I am researching and comparing notes with others in rehabilitating the physical problem that prevents me from having a spontaneous erection even though I am "aroused" in my head. I am working on the basis that alternating between an injection therapy called "Trimix" and Viagra I will oxygenate the organ tissue and one day be able to function well sexually with oral medication. If your ED is found to be purely or predominantly physical then an implant may be the only way you will ever escape ED. Serious venous leak will render even injections useless. If however as I am almost sure, your issue is largely a psychological one, your best chances of being the best you can be is to tackle the problem not the symptom.
I'm not a doctor or a psychologist or a counsellor but I do know after years of "working on myself" that if you are prepared to do the work and open up to a good counsellor that the way back to "wholeness" is not the huge mountain you will have built up in your mind. With all respect to the guys here who have needed to take the implant route, you really should IMO not rush in and you should try to take your mind off "the problem = the symptoms, that is ED" and reprogram your mind to "the solution is working on my self identity, I am a good person and I am on a journey of discovery".
Please Ian, continue to share your story here, there are some really caring and compassionate people who can all relate to aspects of your life story to date. Remember you have a long road ahead of you and the decisions you make, advice you heed etc will determine how you will be at 25, 30, 40, and beyond. ED can, I know from experience, feel like a trap and prison that is like a circular argument. Getting healthy in your mind is almost certainly your best way forward but you need to give yourself time and take the pressure off yourself. Plenty of guys started with performance anxiety and failed to deal with it and got worse.
Best wishes and try to avoid desperation Ian.
Muz
1/08 PSA 7.7, 3/08 PSA 11, 5/08 biopsy Gleason 3+4=7
RARP 18/6/08, Fully continent 31/8/08
53 years old at surgery, now 57
ED major problem until Trimix October 2011
Viagra now looking to be viable
RARP 18/6/08, Fully continent 31/8/08
53 years old at surgery, now 57
ED major problem until Trimix October 2011
Viagra now looking to be viable
Re: My story..
Hi Edmustgo
One more thing to add. At your age men are usually more interested in having sex relationships; while gilrs tend to be more "rejecting". With the time (mid 30-th) the trend usually changes to the opposite. So at some point time later you'll find out that girls are more active in building relationships so it will definitely help...
One more thing to add. At your age men are usually more interested in having sex relationships; while gilrs tend to be more "rejecting". With the time (mid 30-th) the trend usually changes to the opposite. So at some point time later you'll find out that girls are more active in building relationships so it will definitely help...
Re: My story..
Thanks so much for the responses guys..
Kmeister - I saw a urologist whom gave me Viagra. I didn't mention in my first post but I can actually get erections while masturbating, so that would make the problem a psychological one. As for therapy, I was going to a psychologist but she was absolutely no help, left me with not even a shred of valuable insight on my situation. I guess I could always try to find another one..
bob1138 - Thank you for your kind words.. it is always encouraging to hear success stories about implants, and I am happy for you. I just wish it wasn't such a life changing decision to get one because if it wasn't I'd have one in two seconds..it seems like the only true, real way to escape my psychological ED
Dave48003 - Thanks for the response man...your story sounds pretty similar to mine. I guess one of my newer developed problems to my ED now is that I basically have lost sexual interest mentally..I think my brain is trying to not form sexual relationships just because of this mental fear *sigh* it sucks. It would be nice to find a lady who understands.. from my experience most girls are just sluts (There's definitely some anger in that last sentence)
dany1553 - Yeah, after being broken up for about 5 months now I am starting to realize myself a little bit more as an individual, but I like your principles on life..it's cold, but so true. It's kind of hard to find "benefits" to my new personality because of the psychological problems that I have built up in my psyche. However, I am dealing with it day by day, so hopefully things will slowly grow better...
Muz061 - Thanks for the comments. Yeah I have spoken with psychologists, I just feel that none of them have really given me any real true insight so finding the right one is key. I guess what is so laden in my mind is that I want this implant to escape my psychological problem...because I feel that there is almost nothing that could ever solve my psychological ED especially since it has gotten to this point.
Kmeister - I saw a urologist whom gave me Viagra. I didn't mention in my first post but I can actually get erections while masturbating, so that would make the problem a psychological one. As for therapy, I was going to a psychologist but she was absolutely no help, left me with not even a shred of valuable insight on my situation. I guess I could always try to find another one..
bob1138 - Thank you for your kind words.. it is always encouraging to hear success stories about implants, and I am happy for you. I just wish it wasn't such a life changing decision to get one because if it wasn't I'd have one in two seconds..it seems like the only true, real way to escape my psychological ED
Dave48003 - Thanks for the response man...your story sounds pretty similar to mine. I guess one of my newer developed problems to my ED now is that I basically have lost sexual interest mentally..I think my brain is trying to not form sexual relationships just because of this mental fear *sigh* it sucks. It would be nice to find a lady who understands.. from my experience most girls are just sluts (There's definitely some anger in that last sentence)
dany1553 - Yeah, after being broken up for about 5 months now I am starting to realize myself a little bit more as an individual, but I like your principles on life..it's cold, but so true. It's kind of hard to find "benefits" to my new personality because of the psychological problems that I have built up in my psyche. However, I am dealing with it day by day, so hopefully things will slowly grow better...
Muz061 - Thanks for the comments. Yeah I have spoken with psychologists, I just feel that none of them have really given me any real true insight so finding the right one is key. I guess what is so laden in my mind is that I want this implant to escape my psychological problem...because I feel that there is almost nothing that could ever solve my psychological ED especially since it has gotten to this point.
Name's Ian..
22 year old suffering from chronic/severe psychological ed.
When I find the solution, I'll list it here <_>
22 year old suffering from chronic/severe psychological ed.
When I find the solution, I'll list it here <_>
Re: My story..
I suppose my comments are from the vantage point of someone who has been through many phases of sexuality. That has included times when I had no confidence in my ability in this area, and strangely my ED fluctuated between impotence and premature ejaculation.
You are incredibly young to be staking your whole focus of your life (or that's the way it appears) on your sexuality, and a particularly physical division of sexuality at that. That in itself betrays part of your ED psychosis - you are so fixated on "doing it" that you can't get your head out of "not being able to do it". If only it was easy as me telling you "cool it man" and "your past lovemaking partners could be part of your present problem".
I would be saddened to think you would go to drastic steps so early in your life, plenty of guys haven't even had intercourse - in spite of the bragging room claims. I only started to have truly good sex once i became confident and mature enough and found partner(s) cool enough to really rock it. I certainly have no performance anxiety now I have fine tuned trimix injections - 99% sure blue vein throbbers that can keep any woman nailed for hours if necessary.
There are so many good books and other resources, and believe it or not there are good psychologists who don't just want to take your money. The implant of your dreams won't mend your psyche so you will be Titanium Dick with the fragile ego - the best chicks actually dig the whole guy. The jackhammer lover of porno flicks is more myth than real life, if that's what you achieve then you will still tend to fail the RELATIONSHIP test.
Whatever you choose Ian, all the best.
Muz
You are incredibly young to be staking your whole focus of your life (or that's the way it appears) on your sexuality, and a particularly physical division of sexuality at that. That in itself betrays part of your ED psychosis - you are so fixated on "doing it" that you can't get your head out of "not being able to do it". If only it was easy as me telling you "cool it man" and "your past lovemaking partners could be part of your present problem".
I would be saddened to think you would go to drastic steps so early in your life, plenty of guys haven't even had intercourse - in spite of the bragging room claims. I only started to have truly good sex once i became confident and mature enough and found partner(s) cool enough to really rock it. I certainly have no performance anxiety now I have fine tuned trimix injections - 99% sure blue vein throbbers that can keep any woman nailed for hours if necessary.
There are so many good books and other resources, and believe it or not there are good psychologists who don't just want to take your money. The implant of your dreams won't mend your psyche so you will be Titanium Dick with the fragile ego - the best chicks actually dig the whole guy. The jackhammer lover of porno flicks is more myth than real life, if that's what you achieve then you will still tend to fail the RELATIONSHIP test.
Whatever you choose Ian, all the best.
Muz
1/08 PSA 7.7, 3/08 PSA 11, 5/08 biopsy Gleason 3+4=7
RARP 18/6/08, Fully continent 31/8/08
53 years old at surgery, now 57
ED major problem until Trimix October 2011
Viagra now looking to be viable
RARP 18/6/08, Fully continent 31/8/08
53 years old at surgery, now 57
ED major problem until Trimix October 2011
Viagra now looking to be viable
-
Peckerwood
- Posts: 218
- Joined: Tue Aug 23, 2011 10:48 am
- Location: Woodypecker41@gmail.com
Re: My story..
Some of the most meaningful, helpful advice I've seen on our site! This bears reading again and again. Thanks for posting this.
quote="Muz061"]I suppose my comments are from the vantage point of someone who has been through many phases of sexuality. That has included times when I had no confidence in my ability in this area, and strangely my ED fluctuated between impotence and premature ejaculation.
You are incredibly young to be staking your whole focus of your life (or that's the way it appears) on your sexuality, and a particularly physical division of sexuality at that. That in itself betrays part of your ED psychosis - you are so fixated on "doing it" that you can't get your head out of "not being able to do it". If only it was easy as me telling you "cool it man" and "your past lovemaking partners could be part of your present problem".
I would be saddened to think you would go to drastic steps so early in your life, plenty of guys haven't even had intercourse - in spite of the bragging room claims. I only started to have truly good sex once i became confident and mature enough and found partner(s) cool enough to really rock it. I certainly have no performance anxiety now I have fine tuned trimix injections - 99% sure blue vein throbbers that can keep any woman nailed for hours if necessary.
There are so many good books and other resources, and believe it or not there are good psychologists who don't just want to take your money. The implant of your dreams won't mend your psyche so you will be Titanium Dick with the fragile ego - the best chicks actually dig the whole guy. The jackhammer lover of porno flicks is more myth than real life, if that's what you achieve then you will still tend to fail the RELATIONSHIP test.
Whatever you choose Ian, all the best.
Muz[/quote]
quote="Muz061"]I suppose my comments are from the vantage point of someone who has been through many phases of sexuality. That has included times when I had no confidence in my ability in this area, and strangely my ED fluctuated between impotence and premature ejaculation.
You are incredibly young to be staking your whole focus of your life (or that's the way it appears) on your sexuality, and a particularly physical division of sexuality at that. That in itself betrays part of your ED psychosis - you are so fixated on "doing it" that you can't get your head out of "not being able to do it". If only it was easy as me telling you "cool it man" and "your past lovemaking partners could be part of your present problem".
I would be saddened to think you would go to drastic steps so early in your life, plenty of guys haven't even had intercourse - in spite of the bragging room claims. I only started to have truly good sex once i became confident and mature enough and found partner(s) cool enough to really rock it. I certainly have no performance anxiety now I have fine tuned trimix injections - 99% sure blue vein throbbers that can keep any woman nailed for hours if necessary.
There are so many good books and other resources, and believe it or not there are good psychologists who don't just want to take your money. The implant of your dreams won't mend your psyche so you will be Titanium Dick with the fragile ego - the best chicks actually dig the whole guy. The jackhammer lover of porno flicks is more myth than real life, if that's what you achieve then you will still tend to fail the RELATIONSHIP test.
Whatever you choose Ian, all the best.
Muz[/quote]
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