Struggling with the inadequate feelings

[seeking info]

Hi Men, I need your help. I usually get great results with 20 mgs of Cialis and things work great. The only side effect I can complain of is a runnynose. But occasionally I take the meds and things just aren;t as they should be seems like I get cheated out of an orgasm. I have the build up and then I get to the edge and contract just a little and then that;s it.. nothing else.. No big bang no messy finish just a few mild contractions that tell me I am done! Then my mind gets into the action and I begin to feel like a failure and not a man and we all know what happens then.. You couldn't get it up if you tried, begged , prayed or anything it would take an act of God to move the thing. Sometimes when this happens I feel that the Cialis is in battle with the meds I must take to be able to even get around with my health conditions that have caused this problem. NO...ABSOLUTELY NO PRESSURE FROM MY WIFE cause I make sure she gets pleasured in one way or the other. I need to know how to not be so hard ( no pun intended) on myself. Please let me reap the benefits of you guys vast knowledge!! My helath issues are long and complex some of you now if you want to know all about them to safe space please just message me I will answer

Seeking info on how to handle the feeling of failure
aka Scott

[hockey]

seekinginfo:
I am not a doctor nor do I play one.
I haven't got a clue what other meds you are on. I am a Type II diabetic and my meds
caused me all kinds of problems. I would suggest to you that you set down with your urologist and have a very serious conversation about this problem.
He may order some tests that could help you out. You may be a candidate for the latest and greatest bionic implant. First and foremost seek out the best medical advice you can get. Life is to short to not live it to the fullest. If you feel it is important enough take your dear wife along. If she is like mine, at all, she knows your having a problem she just doesn't know how to help you with it or through it. Make that appointment today!
Best wishes and good luck! Please keep us posted as you travel this road. Talking with others helps. At least you can come here a vent! We have all been there at some point. Your doing the right thing just talking about your problem.

[seeking info]

Thank You and I actually already took your advice. I did call my Dr's.. Not just my uro but all of them and inquired about the issue. Each one told me the same thing. I was being impatient and too tense about the problem. Funny thing is... with me once I have the problem I feel like it's gonna happen everytime. If I could stop all the medicines I have to take then I wouldn't even have an ED problem... but I also would be in no shape to even think about having sex. You guys knowmore than anyone else how hard it is on the male ego when thinkgs don't go the way we want them too!! We get anxious and not real happy!!!

Thank you for your response and for each of you who post here. I really have found that I am not suffering alone with this problem. I believe I just need to relex. I am not sure I should get upset over one problem with the meds for just one time!
You guys have a wealth of information!! I appreciate all your candid comments and encouragement!!

S

[Dave48003]

I'm sorry I didn't notice this post earlier. I also had the problem of getting right to the edge and not being able to go over the top. There are many contributing factors, but in my case a major one was my antidepressant. These are famous for this effect, in fact, they are used to treat premature ejaculation!

All the other meds as well as your mental baggage also play into it, but I would suggest if you are on an antidepressant, work with your doc to see if you can switch and have better results. BTW, the culprit for me was Lexapro. I'm now on Welbutrin and the problem only rarely happens now.

Good luck!

[seeking info]

The only thing close to an anti=depressant that I take is xanax0.50mg and only when anxious. I have flat out refused any anit-depressants because of their efffects. I take alot of drugs for spasticity and I have an implanted intrathecal pain infussion system that gives me a continuous dose of dilaudid and baclofen constantly the dilaudid is at 8.5 mgs a day and the baclofen is 185ug daily! I only take numerous oral meds too! Mostly for muscle spasms and spasticity! I try to moniter all possible side effects of anything they give me that is new or if its an increase of curent meds!! Honestly if I could I would stop all of it right now but within a few hours I would be in such pain I wouldn't be able to move!! I get real good results with the cialis as far as the quality of my boners and the dependablity of them.. I just wish it did not take long as it seems to get to wonderland!!!! lolol Thank you for your kind advice. I sincerely appreciate anything anyone can contribute and take heed to all you guys advice!! BTW Do any of the natural products they advertise make any difference for any of you guys!

Scott

[Titan_Man]

Scott,

Very understandably upsetting. Have you tried other methods besides oral? Rings, pumps, injections? Do you know the reason for not maintaining? Sorry if you have answered these before, I'm just trying to offer another opinion. If I can offer any help let me know.

Dave from ma

[3mtrship]

Hi,

Eventually this is what worked for us. We learned how to "Edge" each other. Just Google "Edging" and go from there. We took proactive steps and started edging twice a week. We would bath or shower together with warm water and rub each other with soap. Dry off and apply skin care. NOTE: I went and bought a product whose smell I liked rather then use hers. Then we would play a little and stop on purpose before completion and go on with normal daily life.
Once we were in control of the "sexual incompleteness" we felt better. The next time we got together, we might go a little farther or not........ Eventually the inner sexual feelings build to the point where they HAVE to come out and the world is clearer and beautiful again till next time. The we start all over. Up, down, up........edging.

Feedback is Always Welcome, Jim

[regguy1967]

Though my problems are not the same as yours I understand. I started with ed at age 39.I have very low T at first had great success with orals then they stopped working for me. Have switched to injections lots of different emotions about this really worried about the 4 hour erection thing. I get a wide range of results from the injections then all the mental aspects kick int that can make ed worse.

[3mtrship]

Has low "T" been corrected?

Jim

[seeking info]

Yes the low T has been addressed I have been on it now for over 6 months and noticing results! I also get great quality boners with the cialis but I get to the edge and can't seems to jump off. Also I have noticed and maybe someone else who takes these ED meds have noticed the same problem and that is I leak so bad during intercourse that things get so wet that we lose all feeling and when you have nothing that you feel like you are thrusting against.. well it feels like I am screwin air!!

Ya'll ever had thatg problem and it so how do you solve it!!?

Thank you guys for all this VALUABLe feed back!
Scott