Impact on Career

[LeRoastBeef]

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[ETGuy71]

LeRoastBeef, I’m so sorry you’ve been dealing with this. All any of the FT friends can offer are words of encouragement. Don’t give up! Can you share what your career was/is without any details?
You are a smart guy, please seek some help from a professional counselor, suicide is a permanent decision to issues that can be dealt with. I’m not judging, I’m just concerned.
I too have VL and it’s consuming. But there is a remedy. Don’t throw yourself away, throw yourself into getting help and rising and restoring the real you.

[LeRoastBeef]

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[ETGuy71]

Mid February for me. You are correct competition in many career fields is brutal.
For what it’s worth, when I was the director of a large program and interviewed prospective employees, I viewed grades in one light but I placed more emphasis on personal interaction and how the applicant communicated. My reasoning was based on my experience. I had seen so many people that presented stellar grades and testing but could not function within the team. The truth proved to be that the people with decent grades and determination were the ones that excelled. Because they weren’t just book and test smart, they could think outside the box better and make things work.
Confidence, a willingness to learn, a great attitude and a smile went a long way.
I used to tell the staff a problem is just an opportunity in disguise! There’s a answer to most every issue.....find it fix it that’s the opportunity and a win.
So I decided to focus on fixing my issue by learning and understanding all I can. Yes it is consuming, this ED, but I’m going to be positive.
I hope you will find a way, I know you can.....don’t let quitting be part of you. All the best to you. If you want to take future communication via PM I’ll certainly be there to talk.

[Lost Sheep]

This may or may not apply to your situation, but here is a thought:

When I decided to get an implant, I posted on a dating site for a woman to accompany me on my "journey" out of impotence. I got a few applicants. More than a few of the respondents (even those not interested in accompanying me) commented on my courage.

The tenor of the respondents told me that women were attracted to me not because of my sexual ability, but because of my initiative and determination to "take the bull by the horns" and DO SOMETHING about my shortcoming rather than accept it. Of course, accepting what you cannot change is a virtue, but having the courage to change what you can is a virtue also.

Confidence is an attractant. (But remember, arrogance is a deterrent.)

What may attract a sexual partner may also attract an employer or colleagues with whom you might collaborate.


Another story: I was hospitalized with a condition that could not be diagnosed (for a while). During that time, it was very depressing. Once I had a diagnosis, my spirits lifted considerably. Because NOW there was SOMETHING I COULD DO about it.

A plan of action can do a wonderful job of lifting a cloud of depression and hopelessness.


A third observation: Aerobic exercise releases hormones in your system that lifts spirits. Take you time off work to do that. I know that getting motivated to go out for a brisk walk, much less a jog or a run, but a regular schedule of getting up in the morning and walking down to the grocery to pick up a fresh, ripe banana to eat with breakfast when you get back home can do wonders.

Good luck. My prayers are with you.

[LeRoastBeef]

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[DaveKell]

My circumstances are not quite what you are describing but here goes my reply anyway. I've been self employed most of my adult life by owning a sign company. When I speak at seminars for men looking for answers for ED treatment I always begin by mentioning I closed down a business I'd had most of my life at age 58 and retired. It wasn't because I was necessarily financially ready to retire so young, but because I had lost all determination and motivation from the mental ravages of ED. I became very isolated from everyone around me and even took to sleeping in a guest room of my home for some time. Since being implanted my motivation has returned in spades. My wife (a retired school teacher) and I started a new business together we have loads of fun with. It's nowhere near as lucrative as my former business financially but fills a need I have to be productive. I also began a rather unlikely 3rd career as a songwriter. For over a year I've been playing new original songs every week at a jam session and also at a songwriter circle open mic combination weekly. I've made some surprising new friends through meeting a new friend who was friends and in the tour band of some very heavy hitter iconic Texas musicians such as Guy Clark, Townes VanZandt, Billy Joe Shaver and the legendary Mickey Newbury. He also toured and recorded with Kristofferson and Hank, Jr. He's very impressed with my songwriting and will be recording some tracks very soon on a few demo recordings for me when he returns to Texas from some extended gigs in New Orleans clubs. I have a friend in Nashville who is a retired songwriter. His songs have been recorded by Garth Brooks, John Denver, Dianna Ross, Charlie Pride and many others. I send him raw recordings of my songs he heaps lots of praise on. Many well know Nashville musicians frequently gather at his house and have heard my songs. He told me a guy named Pete Wasner who is in Vince Gill's band liked some of what I sent. Pete wrote nearly all of Vince's most well known songs. 2019 is the year I expect something to happen with all this and I have lots of motivation to make it happen. My new friend is going to see to it I get to play some originals for Billy Joe Shaver very soon as Billy lives just under 3 hours from us. None of this would be happening if confidence in my manhood hadn't been restored. Being able to function sexually is a vital part of mental well being in men and this year I intend to prove how far reaching the results can be. The fact is there's a very successful means to that end available.

[LeRoastBeef]

Well done for all that!

[Skier123]

This post rocks - literally. Very motivating - thanks!

My goal is to get back in the sack in 2019! - I got my eye on my prize already ... you boys go find your own )

[Lost Sheep]

My circumstances are not quite what you are describing but here goes my reply anyway. I've been self employed most of my adult life by owning a sign company. When I speak at seminars for men looking for answers for ED treatment I always begin by mentioning I closed down a business I'd had most of my life at age 58 and retired. It wasn't because I was necessarily financially ready to retire so young, but because I had lost all determination and motivation from the mental ravages of ED. I became very isolated from everyone around me and even took to sleeping in a guest room of my home for some time. Since being implanted my motivation has returned in spades. My wife (a retired school teacher) and I started a new business together we have loads of fun with. It's nowhere near as lucrative as my former business financially but fills a need I have to be productive. I also began a rather unlikely 3rd career as a songwriter. For over a year I've been playing new original songs every week at a jam session and also at a songwriter circle open mic combination weekly. I've made some surprising new friends through meeting a new friend who was friends and in the tour band of some very heavy hitter iconic Texas musicians such as Guy Clark, Townes VanZandt, Billy Joe Shaver and the legendary Mickey Newbury. He also toured and recorded with Kristofferson and Hank, Jr. He's very impressed with my songwriting and will be recording some tracks very soon on a few demo recordings for me when he returns to Texas from some extended gigs in New Orleans clubs. I have a friend in Nashville who is a retired songwriter. His songs have been recorded by Garth Brooks, John Denver, Dianna Ross, Charlie Pride and many others. I send him raw recordings of my songs he heaps lots of praise on. Many well know Nashville musicians frequently gather at his house and have heard my songs. He told me a guy named Pete Wasner who is in Vince Gill's band liked some of what I sent. Pete wrote nearly all of Vince's most well known songs. 2019 is the year I expect something to happen with all this and I have lots of motivation to make it happen. My new friend is going to see to it I get to play some originals for Billy Joe Shaver very soon as Billy lives just under 3 hours from us. None of this would be happening if confidence in my manhood hadn't been restored. Being able to function sexually is a vital part of mental well being in men and this year I intend to prove how far reaching the results can be. The fact is there's a very successful means to that end available.

Dave, that post is the most inspiring thing I have seen from you since you reversed your decision to leave FrankTalk ("SIGNING OFF..." in Nov 08, 2017). Perhaps that hyperbolic assessment is due to me being a singer/guitarist myself, considering reviving tiny, tiny musical career.

Would you care to share any lyrics? I imagine you may have a poem or song we might find heartening (perhaps not suitable for most musical venues but might have ED as the source material?)

Thanks for sticking around and continuing to inspire us.